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Bumper Crop

Updated on August 12, 2010
Bumper Crop, rickzimmerman 2010
Bumper Crop, rickzimmerman 2010

This might seem to you to be just another endearing little farm animal, a cute little billy of the bovine variety. But I gotta tell you, when I look at him lately, I see nothing but a 50-pound family dinner of chevon, waitin’ to be dressed, cooked and served (with a steamin’ side dish a buttered parsnips, and Mama’s hot muffins — don’t be spare with the cold brews, neither).

That’s because of this pint-sized prankster’s penchant for purloinin’ outta my personal patch of auto parts. Right now he’s gnawin’ away at what’s left of a classic fine-condition 1954 Chevy Bel-Air bumper that I was re-chroming for my nephew Duane Willard. You have any idea how much it’s gonna cost me now to find one a those on the Internet? I didn’t think so.

And that’s not the first one, believe you me! I’ve seen more salvageable bumpers — not to mention door handles, side view mirrors, hood ornaments, rain guards, hubcaps, and miss’laneous pieces of side-body trim — go down that goat’s gulpin’ gullet than I could sell in a month of Tuesdays of tryin’. I’d say that pest has got plenty of iron in his diet!

But that goat’s got my goat, ‘cause he’s the favorite of my pretty little Sophie Jane Marie, and whatever is the favorite of my pretty little Sophie Jane Marie is durn near untouchable to anybody else.

So I guess I got to grit my teeth while I watch this guy grind through yet another awesome automotive accessory.  


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