Mia Sue, I will always love you.
My mia sue
Mia Sue, A canine companion, a true best friend.
I could tell you Mia was my dog. While that’s an accurate statement, it doesn’t encompass even a fraction of our relationship. She was more than my dog. She was my friend.
Mia came to us from back home in Oklahoma where my grandmother had rescued her from being a stray. She rode into town on an airplane and landed safely with my dad bringing her home to my mother in a dog crate. Surprised? She was. Happy? Not so much.
Mia was only about 18 months old when we got her, and she chewed, everything. She ate my mom’s cigarettes often, which didn’t make for a happy home life. My mom was gone 12 hours at work, and she would come home to pure chaos. She even tried to give Mia to my brother, but they had a new baby, and Mia was, well, we will get into that later.
Mom eventually started tearing toys open for Mia, just a little hole, and stuffing them with treats, so that she would have to work hard every day to get them out, and my mother’s ingenious plan worked!
Mia eventually stopped chewing anything but her toys and bones, unless, she found a flip flop shoe. That in her mind was fair game, for some unknown reason, and it always would be.
I didn’t live at home during that time, but came home to live with my mom and dad a few years later.
Mia became very much my dog, as did most of our pets. She was still the family pet, but I had a tendency to spoil anything that involved fur and tails. Mia was very playful and hyper. You would get home and she would literally cry and bark and whine and turn and jump and if she could have no doubt she would have thrown her arms out and hugged you like she hadn’t seen you in five years. It wasn’t just when you were gone a long time, you could be gone 10 minutes, same reaction. Mia was a loving dog.
Mia was also a stubborn dog and very territorial. I could tell you all the nice things about her, and she really was a good dog. If she didn’t know you, she was downright mean. Now she never actually bit anyone except one person, and that’s because she thought he was going to hurt me. She would growl and bark and act like she was gonna kill you, but in reality, she would nip and your hands and feet, not much to it really. If you didn’t know better though, you would be scared.
She was a medium sized dog, on the fat size of medium in her later years. My fault all the way, but she never let it stop her. She was black with some patches of reddish tint in her fur and she had somewhat of an apple head stemming from a mix of pit bull and,what we could gather from the sheer height she could jump with the tale tell terrior trait of leaving both back lets straight out, jack Russell terrier.
Mia was smart. I taught her about 8 tricks in literally an hour. You think I’m exaggerating maybe, but I’m not. She was that smart. She had a very large vocabulary for a dog. I could tell her to get on the porch, she would. I would test her at times. I would say you want to, and her ears would go up and I would say sleep, and her ears would go down. I would say you want to go… and her ears would really perk up and I would say to sleep, and she would again put her eaers down. I would say you want to go outside and she would start dancing and jumping and barking. She really knew what you were saying.
Mia genuinely loved you if you were a part of her pack. She would do anything to protect you. My mom used to play with her as we were sitting on the couch. She would start play hitting me, and Mia, half seriously would bear her teeth and snap at my mom. I was hers more than she was mine in her mind.
The only time she ever bit someone for real was when my brother’s brother in law was play fighting. She really thought he was trying to hit me, and she bit him hard. He was mad but I told him she thought he was going to hurt me, so he let it go. He had to let it go, if he had tried to hurt her it would have been a real fight.
I was on disability for some emotional problems that I had and still have, and mia was always there for me. Mia and I really bonded the most however, when I moved away from home, and she came with me.
It was just her and I and my tom cat. We were happy and we were together all the time.
We ate together, walked at the park at least 3 times a day, we slept in the same bed. I always bought her toys when I went shopping and she would be so excited. That didn’t start with me, but it sure didn’t stop with me. She went through every bag until she found her toy. After she squeaked her toy a few minutes she would come again and I would open the bag with her treats and give her 2 or 3. Then she would come back after squeaking her toy a few more minutes and I would give her a bone. Then she was content and sat down and happily chewed.
There was much much more however to our relationship.
You see, Mia saw me all the time. She saw me at my worst, and still loved me unconditionally. As I said before, I struggle with emotional problems. I would come home sometimes, and start out praying. I would get really into prayer and cry, and she would always come check on me. And there were times when some of my past would come up, and I would really cry really hard. Sob to be perfectly honest, and she would come where I was laying, on the bed or on the couch, and she would put her face against mine. She would put her nose on my forehead and she would lick at my tears. And if I still wouldn’t stop, she would get as close as she could and lay her head right beside mine until I was done.
That’s not all. There are times I would get so emotionally upset, that I would start out praying and then go to just talking out loud, and then start screaming at the universe. I would throw a tantrum I guess you could say. At times I would throw something or punch a wall. I would feel so bad because she had to watch that and I would love her and say I’m sorry, and she would just wag her tail and lick me.
See, Mia was more than my dog, Mia was my best friend. She was my family.
Mia could be the most stubborn dog, she was strong, and if she wanted to go somewhere on the leash, she would literally pull so hard she almost pulled me over, a few times she actually did, and I am not a small lady. If I wanted her to come and pulled on the leash, she could plant herself there, and the only way I could move her was to literally pick her up. People might have thought I was hard on her, but the funny thing is, most of the time it was her doing the pulling. It didn’t bother her one bit.
She hated the rain, The only way I could get her to go out in the rain was to get all excited sounding and say let’s go for a walk and grab her leash, then she would face the rain and bound happily to the car. However, at times when we got back it was raining harder, and she absolutely would refuse to get out of the car. So again I would carry her in the house.
Mia was 13 years old when suddenly she got very ill. I didn’t have money for food a lot of times, much less to take her to the vet. So I tried to treat her as best I could. She was throwing up, and couldn’t keep much down. I took her for a walk through the woods which she loved and we went down to the lake where she got in, like she always did, but she was so tired, I had to carry her home, walking up the hill through the woods, crying the whole way.
I took her with me to my brother’s house where I was watching his kids, and she was in the bathroom and I would go in there every 10 minutes or so and stay with her a little while. I would love her and talk to her and lay by her and pet her and rub her head. I talked to her softly and I’m going to be honest, I prayed for her. I prayed for her very hard. I prayed that if she couldn’t get better that the Lord would let her go, because I couldn’t stand to see her suffer.
The moment came when I realized she wasn’t going to get better, and I had the agonizing choice of having her put to sleep. I didn’t have the money, but my mom and step dad said they would pay for it. So I carried her to my car for one last ride. I carried her in the vet and she was so pitiful. She was in such pain and I was holding her just crying as the vet came in. She asked if I wanted to stay and I said yes. Of course. She said well if you want you can just stay until We give her the anesthetic and she won’t know the difference. Well she may not have, but I would have. I told the vet I was staying until the end. How could I leave my friend, my dear friend, who had comforted me so many times, to go to her end alone on a cold table. I couldn’t. No way. They gave her the shot and I held her head in my hands talking to her and loving her and yes, crying my eyes out. She got still and quiet and the vet came in and we turned her around and they gave her the shot and I held her and talked to her and told her I loved her until the vet checked her heart and said she was gone. I stayed for a few more minutes holding her head in my hands. I had to know for certain that I wasn’t leaving her there alone. After I knew in my heart she was gone, I turned and left.
I went to church after that, and when I got home that night I Laid on the couch and bawled, and this time, she wasn’t there to comfort me. I bawled for 3 days straight. I cried harder than I think I’ve ever cried in my life. I’m crying as I write this.
My dear friend/sister paid for me to get her cremated and keep the ashes. I honestly believe it was the kindest thing anyone has ever done for me. That was such a blessing that she knew how much I hurt, and that she was willing to spend 200 dollars for me to keep her ashes.
I come home sometimes and open the door expecting her happy barks, and when the door is open, just silence to greet me. When I’m out buying groceries I will think about getting her a toy, then remember, she’s not there. I wake up sometimes in the morning thinking it’s time to get up and feed her, her warmth is not next to me on the bed. I don’t go to the park anymore, cause all I can think about is how she isn’t with me.
The worst thing about losing her, is that I start to second guess myself. Did I treat her right? Did I do everything I could? Did she know I loved her? Was I ever too hard on her? All of that weighs on my thoughts sometimes. But I know she knew I loved her. She was my baby, and I treated her that way.
I miss her greatly. I’ve never had a friend as close as her. She knew me better than anyone ever has. And yet she loved me just the same.
I know they say dogs don’t go to heaven, but it still makes me smile sometimes to let my mind wander and think of her in a wide open field, finally free to run as hard and fast as she wants, in the green green grass of home.
I will never forget my baby.
I love you and miss you
Mia Sue Mahorney