The day a snake ran me down there's a snake in the toilet grandpa come QUICK

HOW A SNAKE RAN ME DOWN

One Saturday afternoon I was home alone and decided to wash some loads of clothes. Well I love to sing and when I listen to music I always like to sing louder than the music itself. So anyhow I went to the washroom which is on the outside of the house and I started washing of course because I was washing I could not hold my phone in my hands so I decided to use my headphones.

So there I was washing and singing loud and sweetly like a lark, but while being engrossed in the clothes I was getting this feeling to remove the headphone something is around, you've got company . I did not take heed at first then something whispered to me again remove the headphones from your ear so I decided to listen to the voice least I be surprised.

I did remove it and I looked around to my utmost surprise there was this long horse whip snake about fifteen feet away from me looking at me as though we were enemies. Well my dears I dropped whatever was in my hands and ran like hell I jumped over a little barrier at the back of the washroom and sped around the house in the background I can hear the snake scuttling on the vinyl in the washroom. Yes sure he was coming for me, but guess what? I surprised that slimy whimp I out witted him with the skills of a cheetah.

So by this time I was scared as hell adrenaline had my heart pumping faster than a machine gun. When I got around to the front of the house and tried to get my balance and let my heart go back to its usual beating rate . Ah! I forgot to mention while running around the back of the house I skidded on moss and almost fell, but sure as hell I break danced and kept running. My predator wasn't going to make me his victim. I raised my head and what could I see about twenty feet away from me it was the very said snake. His head set to charge at his enemy. What happened seemed like I frighten him when I took off in my jet plane mode around the house and he turn back from chasing me. Well I forgot my heart rate I grabbed the knob on the house door and pelt myself in and locked the door. Of course I was in there worrying would he have the sense to climb through the brick holes over the door? What if he/she comes in what will I do would I be able to run upstairs and jump from the second floor. My uncle came home about thirty minutes after so I was relieved.

So after such an adventure I quit washing for awhile, luckily I have lots of clothes so it wasn’t a big deal except for the back loads. Eventually when I finally told myself the horse whip snake isn’t there anymore. Yet I always look around and yes there are no more headphones in my ears when washing in the yard.

There's a notion in the Caribbean that horse whip snakes only run down pregnant women and according to how many months you are, it will give you those amount of whipping. Well let me tell you I have never been pregnant, nor was I having an immaculate conception, so for Caribbean people HORSE WHIPS RUN DOWN ANYONE.

THERE’S A SNAKE IN THE TOILET GRANDPA COME QUICK

Well growing up with my grandparents in the western part of the country it’s very mountainous and bushy so you know it’s the ideal place for snakes. My granny use to mind ducks, chickens and rabbits anyone who minds chickens knows where there are chickens there’s snakes so we saw them pretty often. People call it the Rat snake its real name is Macajuel or Boa Constrictor. I for one don’t care if it's rat, ants or butterfly snakes get it as far away from me please I hate these slimy serpents.

Years passed and granny stopped minding these snake animals so one night we went to fish and got home around midnight. I had a hot pee on me so I headed for the washroom immediately as the doors was opened. So as I was in motion to sit I looked up and to my dismay what could I have seen halfway on the ceiling and partly dangling over my precious head?

It was a Macajuel with a rat in his mouth I flew out that toilet so fast screaming. My step granddad who was in the kitchen heard me and said what is it I said it’s a snake he went for the lutchet “a solid piece of iron with a sharp point”. He saw the snake still in its posture with the rat in his mouth and he slammed it in the belly with the lutchet the snake dropped the rat and made a squeal and pelt his face forward almost snapping my step grand dad’s face. Wow! What a close one, he then pulled back his head and slipped into a space that would have caused him to fall outside of the house.

Again this was by another washroom where this snake fell, the next morning we went to see if he had died when he fell outside apparently he was only wounded and crawled away into the bushes. Yet another time these evil creatures hindered my washing I got stiff neck every time I was washing I would always be spinning around ever so often to see if I saw the snake, coming from his hidden secret place.

Well that’s it now for snakes and me maybe a next time I’ll talk of another experience.

~ © Joanna Chandler copyright 2014