Wackiest Dog Names

We used to have a dog. My brother called him “Dober”, short for Doberman. So, whenever there are suspicious people or unwanted solicitors snooping around our house, my brother would shout, “Hey, Dober come here!” in his big manly voice. Then he would pretend to be pulling Dober’s leash hooked by the gate. And that helps to shoo the people away.

Truth is, Dober is not a Doberman. Dober is actually a 4.5 pounds full-grown Chihuahua who stands around 6 inches tall. He can’t even bark because he was born with some kind of abnormality in his tongue. So, behind the gate of our house if my brother shouts for Dober, the people outside would kind of hesitate to come closer the gate- they get scared without knowing that it’s my brother imitating a Doberman’s bark. And yes, he can!

Dog lovers now a days are becoming more and more creative not only in dressing up their best friend pets but as well as in naming them. Although some owners would simply name their dogs using human names, some choose to deviate from the traditional naming to funny and some peculiarly creative, which to some may seem awkward or simply hilarious.

Now, here are some monikers, very distinctive names that dog owners really named their canine friend: Bear, Chopsuey, Cat, Chunky-Butt, Dick, Dinky-Pooh, Dogbit, Dusty, Dudette, Eww-Eww, Fish, Fifi, Foofie, Fry-Up, Funny Dogs Name (yes, they actually named their dog that), Ferbert, Ikkle-Jo, Intruder, Jiggly, Lollipop, Lunchbox, Meatball, Moo, Nacho, Naked, Naughty, Panda, Pau-Pau, Poop, Porkchop, Princess Conchita Consuella Bananna-Hammock, Princess Mo Qui Qui Leshae Amika Chrodate Vikki, Oink, Sane, Stay, and Wrinkles.

And what’s with those long sets of name? Would you really call your dog Princess Conchita Consuella Bananna-Hammock, just to say, “sit”? Truly, imagine that?

Celebrities tend to be very creative in naming their offsprings and are even creative in naming their pets. Here’s a few and let’s start with our very own former Mr. President Bush who named his Scottish Terrier, Miss Beazley. So, in one of his interviews, he was quoted saying, “ Miss Beazley loves to hang out in the Oval Office”, referring of course to his terrier.

Here's more:

1. Kate Middleton and her husband Prince William adopted a cocker spaniel and named him Lupo
2. Sexy singer Christina Aguilera has two papillions named, Chewy & Stinky
3. Two of Paris Hilton’s Chihuahuas are called Tokyo Blu & Harajubu Bitch

4. Comedian Adam Sandler owns an English bulldog named Matzoball. His previous dog that died in 2006 was called Meatball

5. The late Anna Nicole Smith’s (RIP) dog was called mommie

6. Kelly Osborne has got Boris and Piglet

7. Naomi Watts dog is called Chicken

No matter what you name your beloved pet, there’s always a good story behind how you came out with the name. For example, Ben Aflleck named his dog Martha Stewart because his wife, Jennifer loves to cook and do some gardening, a perfect Martha Stewart. I wonder though, if the real Martha Stewart felt honored or ticked for that matter.

And, if you just got one now, what would you name your pooch?

If it is me and it's my first dog, I would name my dog carefully. I will keep in mind that I will have to call my dog everyday of my life for as long as I have him/her around. But then again, this is me-traditional and we probably don't think alike. Again, if it is me, I will have to think carefully before naming my dog my favorite human name. I will consider the future of having to name my own kids. It won’t sound and look very nice when my child finds out he or she was named after my first dog. It simply won’t go well.

When you have the name in your head, try to practice saying it loud. Talk to your dog virtually. Say you want to name your dog, Stay. Now practice giving a command: “Stay, come here, Stay”. Lol, I think Stay will be insane.

I know of a guy who named his dog Naked. One time, he was yelling to his wife from the backyard, “ Honey, I’m going to walk Naked out”. Imagine, what the neighbors were thinking.

And then a friend, who called everyone in the house “Sweetie” from her partner to her girls, also calls her dog, Sweetie. So, when she says bye to the dog, she goes: “Bye, Sweetie” and everyone says, “bye” in return, including the dog.

So think carefully and practice. Say, “sit down Harajubu Bitch” or “stop licking Chicken”! Keep practicing and saying the name out loud a few times before you finally name your puppy. Remember, he or she will be your great companion for a lifetime depending on your life span or the breed of your dog—whoever goes to heaven first.

In 2011, according to the Veterinary Pet Insurance Co. (VPI), the top wackiest dog names are:

1. Almost-A-Dog

2. Franco Furter

3. Stinkie Mcstinkerson

4. Sir Seamus McPoop

5. Audrey Shepburn

6. Dewey Decimell

7. Knuckles Capone

8. Beagle Lugosi

9. Shooter Mclovin

10. Uzi Duzi-Du

Other names included in the top 50 are Sirnicholaschewbacca and Dexteronimous Prime. I can’t even pronounce these names. I think, I’m calling my dog, Dogie. It will be a lot easier for me to call him and teach him how to do the dougie dance. (:

1. It is a myth that dogs are color blind. They can actually see in color, just not as vividly as humans. It is akin to our vision at dusk.

2. Chocolate contains a substance known as theobromine (similar to caffeine) which can kill dogs or at the very least make them violently ill.

3. Dogs don’t like rain because the sound is amplified and hurts their very sensitive ears.

TO: GOD, FROM: THE DOG

Dear God: Why are there cars named after the jaguar, the cougar, the mustang, the colt, the stingray and the rabbit, but not ONE named for a dog? How often do you see a cougar riding around? We do love a nice ride! Would it be so hard to rename the "Chrysler Eagle" the "Chrysler Beagle"?

What did the hungry Dalmatian say after his meal?
"That hit the spots!"

And, what do you call a mixed breed of Bulldog and Shihtzu? If you know the answer, leave it in the comment box. I will send you a postcard with no return address (wink) as a token of appreciation for reading my hub. I hope this made you laugh. (:-

Copyright@CrisSp~TM /06-2012. Fearless but not Heartless!