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How To Be Top Cat

Updated on January 11, 2015

How to be Top Cat in your Furever Home

How to be Top Cat in you Furever Home - this little persian tells the story!
How to be Top Cat in you Furever Home - this little persian tells the story! | Source

How to be Top Cat in your Forever Home

Human Beings! Such wonderful pets! Don't we love them? It is so important that we don't try to felinise them too much though. They try their best to attend to our needs and if we wished, we could make them do almost anything - but their understanding is limited and their mental processes are slow. If human beings had a soul like us, we might be forgiven for thinking some of them are wicked, but they can't help themselves by and large and the more intelligent and kindhearted among their number are trainable to some degree or another. Such are human beings! Their hearts are usually in the right place and some actually display signs of a primitive intelligence and the rudiments of language. Here I will give a few examples of how we can train and improve the behaviour of humans in the house.

All photos used in this lens are copyright to Photahsiamirabel. Some of her cat images are available on Zazzle

Become Computer Savvy

Become Computer Savvy
Become Computer Savvy
Become Computer Literate
Become Computer Literate

Master the Computer

Top Cats Need To Surf The Internet

Do not underestimate the power of the mighty computer. Whilst it is difficult to type accurately on these silly little keys human beings insist on using, it is equally possible to train your human to surf the interwebs on your behalf.

How do you achieve your goal? Use your powers of purrsuasion! This is easily achieved by leaping onto the computer desk and looking sweet and delightful whilst attacking mouse or power cables. You must look sweet and delightful or you may just be bundled off!

This strategy will occasional result in your human finding an amazing bird video for you to watch! My human has a little red bug to hand as well, so when she wants to check her messages, she distracts me with little red bug (a laser pen light). She is always careful not to shine it in my eyes though. Chasing the light around is nearly as much fun as watching this bird video she found for me.

Birds Singing in Paxton Pits - A Bird Video My mum Found for Me

Purple Laptops to sit on - and admire the birds with...

My mummy has a purple laptop - it is an HP Pavilion and she loves it very much - but she loves me more! It is a good job I am a little Persian kitty, not a huge mastiff! Just check out the quality of that picture! She hates Windows 8, but she can use a standard desktop and ignore the silly apps - and that is what she does!

Playing Baby Cat

Playing Baby Cat
Playing Baby Cat

Play Baby Cat...

Your voice is a Top Cat's biggest asset!

When we sing, we sound like newborn babies don't we? My voice is beautiful, so beautiful that my people immediately prick their ears up and sing back. You know, they have no idea what they are talking about. Human beings do not have the mechanisms for language and they have limited understanding, but with persistence it is possible to teach them a few tricks. The simplest tricks will delight them. My humans love to play "Babycat!"

As soon as my pets are back from the out - no sooner are they through the back door in fact - then I am there on the doormat singing for kibbles. It might not be the most comfy place to eat, but it is important never to let training standards slip! Of course, I am quite capable of feeding myself, and there are three full bowls of fresh kibbles around the house, but why bother when they so enjoy feeding me kibbles one by one?

Royal Canin - Cat Food for a Top Cat - High Quality Kibble for Different Breeds and Ages

The treats I especially enjoy are actually Royal Canin Aging 12+ Dry Cat Food (Indoor Mature 27 in the US). They look just like regular cat treats and taste really good too. My mum gives them to me as a change from Persian 30 which can get boring all the time. Regular cat treats upset my delicate tummy although I do enjoy roast chicken breast, leg of lamb or steamed white fish on occasion. All hand fed naturally! I also enjoy Maine Coon formula because they are bigger than regular kibble and great to crunch into but I have been equally tempted with Baby Cat from time to time. Here are some of the flavors I personally recommend.....

Top Cat - High Tea

Top Cats dine at the high table too! Of course, we pretty much eat wherever we want to...

Top Cat, Top Table

Top Cat, Top Table
Top Cat, Top Table

Always Stand Tall

Always Stand Tall
Always Stand Tall
Care for the Elderly
Care for the Elderly

A Top Cat Is Aware of the Needs of Others

A Top Cat Cares for the Elderly

Always stand and sit tall! As a Top cat, you are a Child of the Universe and a Chosen One of Bastis and you deserve to be here! Do not stand for human nonsense. Remember though, that a Top Cat has responsibilities to the household - noblesse oblige and all that jazz... Whilst you may be forgiven for hitting a child who deliberately pulls your tail or otherwise causes you distress, you need to be aware that not all humans are fit. Some humans are vulnerable and ill or unsteady on their feet.

This human has a stick because she is frail. She cannot see so well either. I sit with her because she needs some Top Cat vibes. (We are great healers you know!) I do not play with the feet of this human when she walks as she could fall and hurt herself nor do I expect her to move out of her chair for me. We enjoy each other's company in a sedate manner and I respect her because my mummy is her kitten.

Training your Human.... - Could a Dog do this?

Do you find your human easy to train?

A Top Cat Loves Music - Always take the opportunity to join in with some quality mewsic

Cat, dolphin, violin.... And so it goes, the great Tripod! Be aware that human beings enjoy mewsic too although they may not always be expert at producing it. It is our duty to help where we can. I am currently learning to play the guitar, but here I help the hairy faced monkey with his flute playing...

Top Cats Love Music

Top Cats Love Music
Top Cats Love Music

Anyone can play guitar!

Christmas Kitty

Christmas Kitty
Christmas Kitty
Nip Party
Nip Party

A Top Cat is not just for Christmas....

Top Cats Rule All Year Round

We Top Cats rule all day round in this household. This is as it should be, of course. We sleep wherever we want, we do whatever we want. If we want to dine on the sofa, on the bed, on the tower - wherever.... what we say goes! However, if you wish to be a Top Cat, you must learn to integrate with the family celebrations too. It is advisable to pose in front of the Christmas tree, not raid it for the sparkly things. As for eating, try to avoid the turkey.... I for one cannot eat turkey, in fact I am unable to eat any kitty noms that contain turkey as it makes me HUUUUUURRRRRRLLL! If a cat were meant to eat turkey, he would be at least seven feet tall!

Human beings have an acute sense of fun. If you want to make their Christmas (or any other celebration) a happy event, try to encourage a Nip Party! There is nothing more sweet than rolling in dried catnip and tissue paper - and it makes them happy to know we are entertained too.

And so to bed....

And so to bed....
And so to bed....

Top Cats Sleep AnywhereThey Like...

But they prefer your bed....

Top Cats promise you, it doesn't matter what you spend on a bed for them so long as it is big enough for you as well. When the Winter chills draw in, a cat likes nothing better than to snuggle next to a human for warmth. Why! They will even snuggle up together if there is sufficient room. Of course there are those untrainable humans who will insist you sleep elsewhere, and may I suggest you adopt the technique of sneaking up in the night?

It never was a problem for us - we pretty much own the entire house!

Persimew Cards on Zazzle - If you love Top Cats, here are just a few of our Top cat gifts....


Woolly Bear

Woolly Bear the cream point Himalayan wishing you a Mewy Chwistmouse.

A Study in Lilac


Dolcie says....

nything you want her to say! This beautiful lilac persian card is customizable for thank yous, birthdays, invitations, congratulations or just about anything a human pet might need to say.

Your Pad or Mine?


Your Pad or Mine?

Mew wants to know the answer so he can get on with warming this mousepad for you!

All Warm and Fuzzy


Warm and Fuzzy

What could be nicer than a fluffy kitty pile? Dolcie and Mew get so close at times it is hard to see where one ends and the other begins.

Persian Cat with Orange Eyes


Dolcie Again...

This time I tried to enhance her bold orange eyes to make her look more commanding!

Thank You Card with Lilac Persian

If you enjoyed browsing through my Persian pictures, why not follow the link to my Zazzle store where you can see more cat themed cards and gifts and explore gifts you can personalize.
If you enjoyed browsing through my Persian pictures, why not follow the link to my Zazzle store where you can see more cat themed cards and gifts and explore gifts you can personalize. | Source

© 2013 Lisa Marie Gabriel

Please leave your Pawmark here - we, the Persimew Top Cats thank you for your visit.

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    • CherylsArt profile image

      Cheryl Paton 

      4 years ago from West Virginia

      Your top cat is quite the charmer.

    • profile image


      5 years ago

      "Meow! Thank you Top Cat, for your tips on training my human!" ~Celestial Dawn, Orion, and Mystik Blue

    • Stazjia profile image

      Carol Fisher 

      6 years ago from Warminster, Wiltshire, UK

      I'm sure cats around the world will be grateful for your instructions on training humans.


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