11 miles from home: Chapter 3: The Rescue

The paramedics rolled up to the scene and they jump into action. Next to me one of them opens up a medical case, that could be described as a really fancy toolbox. A couple of others come with the basics, a backboard, a cervical collar, and the like. They lift me onto the back board while one paramedic starts an IV drip. Toolbox boy pulls out a pair of scissors and starts cutting away at my clothing.

During all this a paramedic asks me my name and my social security number, I tell him. Seconds later another paramedic comes up to me and asks my name and social security number, I respond again. Seconds later another paramedic comes up to me and asks my name and social security number, I tell him. Seconds later another paramedic comes up to me and asks my name and social security number... well you get the idea. After what seemed like each paramedic was taking a turn asking me my name and social security number... I snapped at them and said, "Seriously, are you guys standing in line and using me as a training exercise? You all better listen because I've already said this 15 times... and once again for the final time my name is ... and my social security number is... I hope one of you finally has a pen and wrote it down so you will quit asking me the same two questions."

Then came the warmth of the IV pain meds .... oh yeah... so goooood. From that point I was cracking jokes, answering questions, and then the stretcher ride into the paramedic's truck. Which for the most part was smooth.

Inside the truck they kept the pain medicine dripping and the oxygen flowing. They would radio in things and receiving information. One medic looks at me and tells me that my left leg is 3 to 4 inches shorter than my right leg. I made some medicine induced joke and everyone in the truck laughs. Then the medic tells me that in many of these car versus motorcycle collisions amputation is a possibility, and I make some other wisecrack. Then a paramedic tells me that they are going to have to put my left leg into traction and even on pain meds it is going to hurt... but he will do everything he can to make me as comfortable as possible. I watch a guy pull my sneakers off... and I begin rattling joke after joke and anecdotes. We are all laughing it up. I feel this light pulling sensation on my left leg and I tell the head medic, "Hey admiral or general whatever your rank is... I feel some light pulling on my leg can't we just do this and get the painful part over with? I appreciate y'all trying to be gentle and all .... but." The medic interrupts with a puzzled look on his face and says, "We already put your leg into traction, that pulling is the weight action to keep your leg in place... damn, you can take some pain." We both laughed.

A Florida Highway Patrol trooper came in and asked my a couple of questions. I asked her to call my company's president and tell him to call my "roommate" and tell him to take care of the dog, and what phone calls to make. I also asked the FHP trooper to please contact my girlfriend and said that she'll need to be reached via email... we talked back and forth, I think a paramedic jumped in here and there... the trooper then left the medical truck.

One of the paramedics then told me that I was going to be airlifted to Bayfront Medical Center since they have a trauma center... there was talk amongst a voice on a radio, and paramedics that maybe just a local hospital would be a better route, because I guess BayFlite was handling another emergency at the time, but the decision was made to wait for the chopper and the trauma center was the best way to go.

The trooper had returned with my Motorola CLIQ and a few other import belongings from the spillage of my scooter. One of the paramedics asked me if the two packages the trooper brought with her needed to be mailed. I simply said yes. He just looked at me and said that he would run them over to the mailboxes and drop them in for me. Then he asked what was in them and I told him that my company manufactures cigarette rolling papers... everyone busted out laughing. The trooper then told me that she had contacted my company's president and she told me not to worry he'll handle everything. He even contacted our warehouse manager, who was near by on his "big date", to grab my scooter and whatever else that was mine... good thing the warehouse guy drove a pickup truck.

BayFlite had landed right in the middle of the road. The paramedics began to give the details to the on-flight nurse and paramedic. Then they rolled me out of the EMS truck on the stretcher and away... I was being wheeled toward the waiting medical helicopter. I heard a paramedic shout, "Hey! turn the video off on your phone! Turn it off now!"

(later I found out it was the warehouse manager who was the video villain... I'm still waiting for my copy, but he needs to cut it up some since its too big to send as an attachment... I hope to have it soon so I can post it.)

I was locked and loaded into the helicopter and away we went. Up, up into the sky. I said to one of the copter guys, "Just my luck.. I've always wanted to be in on one of these copter rides and now I finally get my chance and the view sucks."... he chuckled. I was on my way to the hospital via the friendly skies.