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The Jinxed Red Thunderbird

Updated on May 21, 2011

There it was, a 1991, deep red colored Thunderbird. It was the most beautiful car I had ever seen. The paint job was still shiny and hardly a scratch on it.

I had just moved back home to share a house with my brother Rick and a close friend, Randy.

That’s where I discovered this rare treasure out in the back yard sitting up on blocks. “What could be wrong with a car as beautiful as this?” I asked myself. I decided to find out.

It so happened, this Thunderbird belonged to our friend Randy. He had bought it from Rick, who had gotten it from his nephew who had bought it from a cousin, who had traded it for….well, you get the idea.

There was a long list of previous owners. According to Rick, the car was apparently jinxed. “Everybody who has owned it ended up going broke trying to keep it on the road.” he explained.

“What’s wrong with the car?” I queried. Randy arched an eyebrow sensing a possible deal.

“Well, I think all it needs is an electronic control module” he answered. I pumped him for more information.

As it turned out he had also replaced the ignition, the voltage regulator the coil, a myriad of sensors and the fuel pump…well, the list looked like an auto parts store inventory!

Of course he hadn’t replaced everything himself. It seems the entire family had sunk a fortune into what had now become known as “The Black Hole of Calcutta”.

Now, Randy who happens to be a master mechanic, has the car up on blocks. What does that tell you?

Randy quickly assumes a used car salesman persona. “I can fix that Thunderbird” he pitched. “I’ve replaced everything in the electrical system.

All it needs now is an electronic control module. I just haven’t had the money to get one.”

My mind was already wandering. I could picture myself proudly motoring about town in that gleaming machine.

Dreaming on, I imagined pulling into the parking lot at work while coworkers enviously stared at my spectacular entrance.

That did it. The deal was made. I got online and laboriously tracked down a dealer who had the elusive part.

Seems they don’t make them anymore. But being thrifty, I elected to get it from a salvage yard instead, costing only half the price of a remanufactured one.

Somebody once told me you get what you pay for. I think it was granddad. Anyway he was right.

Randy got the car off the blocks and on the road in no time. It ran for two days before the fuel pump and control module blew!!

So I went back to my computer and ordered the remanufactured part.

I’ve been waiting 7 days now for the part to arrive. I’m the proud owner of a beautiful red, shiny Thunderbird…still up on blocks.

But just imagine! I’ll drive it to work and watch my coworkers stare in envy as I make my spectacular entrance.


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