How To Survive the Worst Bosses
The worst employers have easily labeled mental problems. They use the office as a psycho drama, a stage, a fiefdom.
For example, those with Inferiority Complexes plaster their offices with images of themselves and their successes.
Dictators who need to control everyone and everything around them use the office as their fiefdom.
Psychopaths are very successful in business, probably the 'murder' of their competitors, the abuse of their workers, prevents them from becoming serial killers
So if you think your boss is Wacko, you are probably right.
When You can't Quit...
Many times you have to put up with whatever is thrown at you;. Just as where it rains on your garden party or your car breaks down en route to your wedding, you deal with it.
You learn to know what you can't control and what you can; and what you can control is YOU.
You can control how you feel, how you think, how you respond, even how you place the event in your consciousness.
Once you catch that your Boss is a psychopath everything falls into place. You don't need to look for logic, you don't need to waste time trying to find a reason.
What causes one to experience stress at work is being put into a situtaion of illogic.
The moment you realise what you are experiencing is more psycho-drama than business and doesn’t have to make sense, you lose 50% of your stress.
To get rid of the other 50% requires a readjustment of perception, not totally impossible.
Once you do a bit of reading about psychopaths and recognise your boss, it is suddenly clear.
You then develop strategies which don't merely protect you, but reset your work environment to as close to lounging in a spa as possible.
Although it seems impossible, it isn't.
You can reassess your relationship to the job when you know that your boss is mentally ill.
When you know that the work isn't important to him, it is the power, the control, the posturing, the sound of his own voice, that takes priority, you coast.
He wants to force you to work on weekends or overtime. It is not because the business requires this but Boss needs to express his 'ownership’ of his
Use what ever lie or trick you can to NOT work on weekends. NOT do overtime; Unless...
you aren't working for him but using his office, his supplied to run your own business.
It may be unethical, but so is being made to work on weekends.
Think of it like this; you have a free phone, free Internet, free paper; etc. Use your imagination. Turn the ‘punishment’ into profit; or to be trite; turn lemons into lemonade.
This is not impossible.
If the Boss comes in on Weekends to watch you, don't come in. If he fires you, well, you must know which governmental agency you can complain to.
When one has a dictator for a Boss, stop caring that he demands you do the work wrong or waste time on protocols.
Do what he says as he says.
You might be the leading expert in the field and he might be a beginner; if he won’t listen that first time you try to explain, stop explaining.
When one has a micro-managing boss who must vet every keystroke or recount every shipment, one does substantially less work than if the boss would take a trip to Antarctica.
Doing less work is always good for you.
If, in real life you can type ten letters in thirty minutes, for the Boss From Hell it is one letter in thirty minutes.
You do this by making mistakes and having him shout at you to slow down.
Trust me, this strategy is sure fire.
It works for all Bosses, from the Psychopath to the Micro-Manager, and gives them pleasure. They find fault, and feel better about themselves. They berate you for working too fast.
What can be better than a boss demanding you slow down?
That you do Less Work?
When one works for some inexperienced duffer, who has inherited a business and/or knows nothing, remember, you are not being paid to teach him.
Arrive on time and leave on time. He can waste the whole day. If he demands you perform useless tasks, as long as you’re getting paid, why grouse?
Take it for comic relief.
Do not fret about being unproductive, do not think, “I have so much work to do!”
You have nothing; the company has the work to do.
If the work piles up until the company has to rent another premises to hold it, so what?
To protect yourself from Monster Bosses disengage your mind from the business.
Concentrate on what is important; i.e. how late can you arrive without penalty?
How long a lunch can you take without question?
How early can you leave?
These are important. What you do during the day is not.
You are to be at work at 8:30, arrive at 8:37. Log in, go to the bathroom until 8:50. Set up to begin and start at 9:00. Just giving yourself that free half hour does a lot for your spirit.
Take lunch from 11:55 until 1:05. That extra ten minutes of non-stress has a real health benefit.
Prepare to leave at 4:15, closing down so that by 4:27 you are out the door. Hence your actual work day is not eight hours, your actual day is slightly over six.
This withdrawal of two hours of torture a day is precious.
During those Six hours of your Eight Hour work day do as little as possible.
Enjoy traveling the Internet if you can, looking out the window, fussing with your desk, enjoying your snack, anything that does not bring your mind into this building, to this job.
Take Control of Yourself
When you analyse what is going on, and realise that you are part of a 'fantasy world' created by a mentally ill guy, develope strategies which turn stress into relaxation.
You use his tools against him.
You recreate the job in the way that cuts out all of his incursions into your head space. You beome not simply proactive, you take control of yourself so that you know what you are going to do, you know how your boss will respond, and it all becomes a game.
You just have to control yourself and not burst out laughing.
Many of the worst bosses demand you work late or on off days.
Make up your mind yesterday that you won’t be working late tomorrow.
As part of your 'program', have someone call you ten minutes before quitting time, so you; ‘have to leave’.
Even if the call is from someone who invites you to a party, make your face serious nod, say, "Alright...yes...yes, I understand. I will be there..." And then, look around, harried, and say, "I have to go."
Get someone to pick you up. Say whatever it takes to get away from that office.
When he demands you work late, say, “I’m sorry, I can’t.”
He can’t legally fire you for not working late. If he does, you have a sweet lawsuit. In fact, a complaint to any agency which deals with Employment is sufficient.
Parents will say, at some easy point, “I have to pick up my daughter at school.”
If it is a job in which you are told before hand that you will be required to work late on occasion, (and are paid time and a half) then you know what to expect .
But in most cases these Bosses of Hell spring late work on you a few minutes before you are about to leave. “I can’t,” you reply. Don’t get into an argument,
Learn to shut off your cell phone.
If you have to buy another phone so as to avoid missing calls you want, do it. It is cheaper to have your work cell phone turned off until thirty minutes before you are about to leave for work, and off again as you leave the office.
This prevents those late night calls, those weekend calls, and those crack of dawn wake ups.
If he complains, look blank. Remember, slavery was abolished.
Lectures; yeah, he’s good at that. Everything is a vicious attack, and a long insulting diatribe.
Most of these characters will say things like; “We demand professionalism..” especially when he’s the only boss.
Using the royal ‘we’ helps those who have deadly inferiority complexes feel powerful.
Say nothing, for even if you agree with him, he won’t shut up. He is talking to hear his lordly voice, not to impart information.
Consider his lectures deductions from your working day. If he babbles for 5 minutes, you work 5 minutes less.
Keep reminding yourself that your boss is mentally ill, which is manifested by his diatribes. He has personal issues he can’t confront so he uses his slaves to take out his frustrations. Don’t listen, don’t take it to heart.
Normal brains may once in a while snap under pressure, abnormal minds don’t need pressure.
Don’t give yourself an ulcer trying not to respond, nor let the stress cause you to speak up.
Let the words flow past you like confetti. He needs to talk, you don’t need to listen.
Sure he’ll get more abusive when he hasn’t reduced you to quivering jello, but think of it like this; most of these people have bad hearts so if he goes on long enough, he’ll suffer, not you.
Many of the worst employers create a chaotic situation.
No one knows what comes next,
This is to keep the workers off balance.
The point is; Why Do You Care?
If the business tank, if he goes to prison? So What?
Cut the Stress
Go over the work day and locate those moments when you feel powerless and remove them.
It could be waiting for your lift home, which will always be late. When you get 'free' transport it is often worth what you pay for it. Better to pay for a Taxi and get away from the office when you want then stick around.
It could be that 'free lunch' which, as said above, costs you in stress. Better to bring your own lunch from home, or skip the meal.
It could be calls every minute on the minute, which is why you shut off your cell,
It could be when your Boss learns you love the Internet and removes it from your computer, or knows you have obligations which he seeks to thwart. Whatever it is, remove the sting.
Often you can mislead by making him think you have to leave early on Monday for a Class, this will cause him to find much to do for you; but the class is actually on Tuesday and you have no problem getting out on that day.
Once you know that you have a boss who has serious mental problems you can easily deal with him, and even enjoy it.