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How to Deal With a Dictator

Updated on July 7, 2017

Extremely Close and Incrediably Annoying

Few of us will ever meet one of those heads of state; but most of us have been subjected to the phylum at school, work, even in the home.

These are garden variety Dictators.

Garden variety Dictators are exactly the same in mind and nature as those famous ones.

The difference is that where Tammerlane could have had you killed, Mr. Tam. R. Lane, your math teacher, can only suspend you.

Just as if you woke up and found yourself facing Genghis Khan and his hordes you'd have to quickly adopt certain survival skills, so to when you work for Mr. Geng. S. Kahn.

Never Say No to an Ape

Persons who have dealt with large predators know never to look them in the eye. Looking a dangerous carnivore in the eye is read as a challenge. Hence never look at the Dictator unless he commands you so to do.

If you are at school or work, keep your head down. Focused on a book, a computer, even busy yourself with a stack of files so as to give him your back, or at least your side.

Do not look at Mr. Dick Tator.

Mr. Tator has issues with himself and the world. The sun doesn't rise when he commands it. The sea doesn't recede at his glance.

He is quite angry at these insults.

He is in an almost permanent state of being P.O.d. The only time Mr. Tator is happy is when he is given some award, commendation, appointment, and hailed as the 'leading expert' and/or has broken someone's neck.

As most times; Mr. Tator is P.O.d. whatever you are about to speak to him (unless you are telling him his Award has arrived and Oprah is here to interview him) is not going to go well for you.

Survival Skills - 1

Never looking at him nor speaking to him, unless he demands it are vital skills.

Don't let your usual courtesy and/or normalcy intervene.

Unless he is standing in front of you calling your name, focus on the book/screen/work whatever.

Dick Tator may be passing by your desk with his mind focused on the hailing crowds as he sits on the throne.

He doesn't see you, you do not exist in his world. To look at him, especially try to meet his eyes is a challenge he will not accept.

To speak to him without permission led to beheading in his past life as King of Medes and Persians. Hence, keep your head down to keep it.

Don't Talk Back

Mr. Tator wants to pronounce his Decree. He does not wish to hear anything from anyone. He is probably wrong, misguided, but one must never interject. One must say nothing.

Let him talk.

It doesn't matter if he thinks it is Wednesday or that the Sun goes around the Earth. Do not attempt to correct him.

This is another beheading offense. Let him talk. You are not being called upon to 'vote'. Dictators do not allow votes.

Say nothing.

One of the biggest mistakes, whether Mr. Tator is your grandfather, teacher, or boss, is to speak when not called upon. Let him do all the talking.

So he thinks Margret Thatcher is still Prime Minister of England; so what?

So he thinks if he repeats rubbish ten times it becomes gold, so what?

Why bother force a little daylight into the dark cave of his mind.

Be silent and disaffected. It has nothing to do with you.
Let me repeat that

It has Nothing To Do with You

A dictator behaves as he does
whether one, ten, one hundred
or one thousand persons at his

Hearing himself pontificate gives him orgasm.

To say anything, correct, disagree, even make a sound to prove you are alive will annoy Mr. Tater. Hence, become a deaf mute. A deaf mute who 'lip reads'.

This method of looking at his mouth when he is talking, not his eyes, is taken as being suitably submissive.

There is no reason to suppress a person who is already on his knees. Dick Tater doesn't have to force you to submit; by looking at his mouth and being silent he feels you have been conquered and will actually soften.

When You Have NO Choice

There are times you can't leave.

You Have To take this course.

You Have To put up with obnoxious Uncle Snot.

You can't quit this job. (Or you are in the Army or Prison).

To show any form of volition, intelligence, disagreement is going to end badly. For you.

Play the role of the deaf mute. Say nothing, hear nothing. Do whatever you are assigned to do. Whether it's stupid or a waste of time, make no response.

Do it.

School ends.

You will either leave home or Uncle Snot will die.

You will eventually leave this job.

When you are not in class, when you aren't at work, don't think about it.

Do not ever think about class or about work until you are physically present.
Learn to stop caring to the extent that it all becomes a blank.

Learning not to care is your task.

This class starts at 9:00 and ends at 9:45. As you enter, consider the work, not the teacher. Focus on the work until you can virtual 'blank' that teacher.

Uncle Snot is in the dining room. He is pontificating at the table. Shut your ears, eat your food. If he starts to call your name, look at him stupidly, if forced to speak say you were thinking about the food. As soon as dinner is over, go away. Ignore him entirely. If he speaks at you, then do the 'lip read thing'. When he's done, go away.

Having Mr. Tater for a Boss can be managed. Think of the happiest moments of your life on your way to work. As you enter, carry the joy as long as you can. Take every possible chance to be out of the office and work as slowly as possible.

Don't tell Mr. Tater; "Sir I completed that document", wait for Mr. Tater to ask you; then nod. He's likely to ask; "Is it correct?" You will say, "I think so..."

This should set him off on a tirade of 'Know as opposed to Think' he will probably waste at least five minutes of his time, (not your's because you get paid for sitting in the chair at your desk), demand you check it again, then go away.

When he goes, you write another article for Hubpages.

By working for Dick Tater you do substantially, and I mean substantially, less work than if you were employed by a human being.

As you are so demotivated by Dick Tater, you need a lot of time to gear up.

By this, I mean, needing a lot of time to get into the job.

You come to work.

You turn on the computer, you set up. Do your personal internet. Look over something you did yesterday, or the day before, and have that open.

Nit pick it if you want.

Dick Tater may ask for it in an hour or two.

Dick Tater may dump ten files on your desk, or given you ten chores. Write everything down.

Sure it will annoy him, because he won't get orgasm is you do everything right;
and if you write it down, he'll have difficulty in saying you forgot.

Do not think that those ten files or ten chores will be done today.
You are not going to finish them today.
You may finish two, perhaps.

And leave them on your desk until he comes for them. He may not come until tomorrow.

In real life, you'd kill those ten files within two hours. But this is not real.
This is the world of Mr. Dick Tater; its all cartoon.

Let's study obnoxious Uncle Snot.

By Uncle Snot being what he is you are driven from the complacency of your home to meet new people and experience new things. You are no longer home bound, tied to your computer, you are out in the real world. Escaping Uncle Snot is a great benefit to your life.

Take that horrible teacher, Mr. Lane. You are forced to learn on your own. How is it a bad thing for you to teach yourself?

There is an up side to Dictators.


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    • qeyler profile image

      qeyler 5 years ago


    • mattdigiulio profile image

      mattdigiulio 5 years ago

      Oh, bosses. Great insights

    • qeyler profile image

      qeyler 5 years ago

      It can be managed, and almost becomes easy when you catch the tricks. Many people who could easily complete twenty tasks in a day get to do one due to Dick Tater. Letting him rant and rave is cool. Cause you ain't doing nothing during that 5/10 minute break. Many people spend all day playing games on the Internet because Dick Tater is ignoring them. Alas.

    • gail641 profile image

      Gail Louise Stevenson 5 years ago from Mason City

      That's true!

    • qeyler profile image

      qeyler 5 years ago

      esp. when you work for one

    • gail641 profile image

      Gail Louise Stevenson 5 years ago from Mason City

      Dictators sure aren't any good. Great hub!

    • qeyler profile image

      qeyler 5 years ago

      Most of them I've met are the kind who are inferior people...who have gotten power (even manager of a small office) and abuse and oppress the staff. So they use their power to bully sure.

    • charmike4 profile image

      Michael Kromwyk 5 years ago from Adelaide, South Australia

      Can a dictator also be considered a bully in your experience qeyler? BTW are looking forward to seeing the Sacha Ben Cohen film, The DIcator, when it is released later this year. Cheers Michael