ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Hostile Work Environment: How to Resolve Harassment in the Work Place

Updated on August 13, 2012

What to do about harassment

If you are involved in a controversial situation at work, it is important to keep careful documents of the details of what has occurred to the best of your honest recall as soon as possible. This is imperative because the mind has a way of forgetting or twisting the events into your own personal perspective. As time goes on it will be more and more difficult to ‘accurately’ relay this information should the incident be called into question with management.

It is even more important for you to document what occurred if you have a verbal or physical altercation. If you are the perpetrator you should expect that your behavior will be reported and written up in a form of disciplinary action. If you are the ‘target’ of an argument or have been manhandled it is just as important to remember details of how it began and seek management assistance. Remember: it is always important to follow the chain of command. This supports your case.

Protect Yourself

In situations where you are the target and your boss is the perpetrator who is writing you up for unsubstantiated disciplinary action, document your side of the story and jot down names of witnesses who may be questioned should there be an investigation. Then, report your manager to the person he reports to-follow the chain of command. If you are unsuccessful in getting someone’s attention report this to the human resource department.

Immediately check your employee handbook for information which may be helpful in filing a claim against your manager. If there is a form, complete this. If not, inquire with H.R. about the appeal process. You may not be able to save your job, but you can go down fighting and let it be known what your grievances are.

If you belong to a union immediately contact your union representative and make your report known through her. In many companies there is no union for employees to join and you are on your own to defend your case. That is where good organization comes in handy.


Use Human Resources

Typically, there will be a meeting with a human resource representative who is a neutral party. If this occurs when you are the target and your boss is handing you a disciplinary action form that you read and disagree with you do not have to sign it. Although this may appear to be an insubordinate action on your part keep in mind that you will need to advocate for yourself at a very emotionally charged moment. To lose your temper will not help your case. To wilt like a wall flower will also be detrimental.

Refusing to sign a disciplinary action form is not illegal. You must jot on the form that you are the employee who disagrees with the accusation and will be submitting an attached letter explaining your side. Then, return to H.R. for an additional meeting away from your boss, to explain your letter and request its attachment. If there is an appeal process make sure you initiate this before its deadline passes and you lose your opportunity.

The appeal will buy you some time and allow you to pursue a longer plan of action. Your H.R. rep should advise you step by step on what to expect next, but again: check your policies and employee handbook.

Organization Helps

Organization is the key to having you and your case be taken seriously, should it get to the point where you will be attending a meeting with the offensive parties. Having a calendar of memory joggers, (a simple date book with a notation: i.e. ‘incident’ 4-27-11; call to H.R. 4-28-11, etc.), is sufficient to help recall dates.

Next, place copies of appeal letters: make three as a general rule-one for yourself, one for administration who is examining your complaint and a third to jot notes on during the meeting; copies of emails; letters or affidavits from witnesses; copies of disciplinary action forms, etc. in pocket binder or portable file.

Know what it is that you want out of the corrective action. Are you seeking a dismissal of unwarranted charges; your position back; your unpaid wages? It is important that the clearer you are about the outcome the more direct and confident you can be in negotiations.

Call a Friend

Meetings with human resource representatives or upper management can be very intimidating, but realize that you have nothing to lose if you are already threatened with losing your job. Rather than being nervous make a point to remind yourself you are doing nothing more than standing up for what you deserve, and then go for it. It brings honor to you and it often brings a respect from co-workers.

Utilize your support system whenever you are going through a highly emotional situation. Let your support team, (one or two key players), know when you will be heading into a meeting and ‘bookend’ a support call. Bookending means you make a quick call alerting the other person of the meeting and you listen to the encouragement and cheer. After the meeting you check in with that person once again for a few minutes to de-brief. It keeps you focused on the ‘prize’, (recall the goal you have set for the corrective action). It also reminds you that you are not in this alone.

The Dance of Negotiation

Finally, be willing to compromise. In the process of negotiation it is a little give, a little take. If you want blood, an apology from an errant manager, or ‘everything’, whatever everything means to you, you will be sadly disappointed and may actually end up with nothing.

In my experience, my new manager wanted to terminate me on grounds of insubordination, and she was attempting to build her case on fictitious information. As part of the termination process there was an investigation. This meant I had to meet with the Director of Nursing. I was in the meeting for one and a half hours. I was grilled by a woman who could put the best poker players to shame with her blank, attentive affect. I was aware that this was one shrewd woman who would hang onto everything I said and relay it back to me with a series of, ‘what if’s, why’s and other probing questions. She had the memory of an elephant and brought up incidents that she recalled from some of my earliest encounters that were not written in the books-off handed remarks about my character, personality and attitude.

In turn, I countered by taking my time, anticipating the direction of the questions and bringing the talk back to the issue at hand; giving examples of proper nursing standards I employ; offering names of witnesses; and emphasizing flaws in the allegations.

In the end, the D.O.N. set aside the termination of employment charges, and supported my transfer to another part of the hospital. After our meeting she brought the H.R. Director into the room to begin working on that next step. What a relief to know I was not being terminated after all.

It is very gratifying standing up and fighting for what you feel is right and have justice delivered. I am thrilled and eternally grateful for the wonderful family and friends across the globe that has been cheering me on during this very stressful time-many blessings to you all.

Please take the poll

Have you ever experienced a work related conflict?

See results


    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment
    • Denise Handlon profile imageAUTHOR

      Denise Handlon 

      9 years ago from North Carolina

      Thanks Stephanie. I enjoyed our chats earlier online. Take care and have a wonderful weekend.

    • Stephanie Henkel profile image

      Stephanie Henkel 

      9 years ago from USA

      Hugs, Denise! What wonderful advice you give! The proof of its value is that it worked! I'm so sorry for all the stress you've been through, but thrilled to hear that your perseverance, organization and determination paid off. I do hope your new position is in a happier and more supportive working environment. Good luck!

    • Denise Handlon profile imageAUTHOR

      Denise Handlon 

      9 years ago from North Carolina

      Hi Temirah--Thanks, it is WONDERFUL news. I have an interview with the new manager on Wednesday. I'm excited and hoping it goes well. Thanks again.

    • profile image


      9 years ago

      Great news for you Denise! I hope you're feeling stonger from your ordeal and good luck in your next role in the hospital.

    • Denise Handlon profile imageAUTHOR

      Denise Handlon 

      9 years ago from North Carolina

      I have written one last year this month: Sacrifices of Fathers. My mom's hub is: Mother's Day Madness. Thanks for asking. :)

    • Happyboomernurse profile image

      Gail Sobotkin 

      9 years ago from South Carolina

      Yes, we do learn through example of our parents as well as co-workers. I'm eager to learn more about your Dad. Have you written hubs about him that I've missed, or if not, have you considered writing a hub about him?

    • Denise Handlon profile imageAUTHOR

      Denise Handlon 

      9 years ago from North Carolina

      Thanks Gail. It has been quite an emotional roller coaster these past two months, that is for certain. I spoke with Cara this morning briefly and told her how my thoughts kept drifting to her grandfather. My dad was an advocate for justice and rights. At one time he worked as a tool and die maker in Detroit and was elected Union Rep. He always was logical and clear headed and on more than one occasion steered his children through legal procedures when, as teenagers, we met up with bosses who refused to pay, or other injustices because of our age and inexperience. I learned a lot from him-more than I could ever have imagined. He would have been proud of the outcome.

      Thanks for your well worded comments. I do agree with you. If I left nothing more re: an impression on my co-workers-it is the fact that there is an appeal process. NO ONE knew of this b/c 1. we just don't think that we are going to get into trouble; and 2.we don't have a printed copy of the employee write's book-it is all online. and 3. no one was aware of where to go for this. I only wish that the LPN who 'left' under duress in April had stood her ground and fought back. Thanks again for your feedback.

    • Happyboomernurse profile image

      Gail Sobotkin 

      9 years ago from South Carolina

      Excellent, factual hub that shows a clear blueprint for action should one experience a conflict at work. I particularly love your advice to gather a support team of a few caring people not directly involved in the work situation.

      I am glad, but not surprised (because of your character and strength) to see you using your own personal experience with a recent work conflict as a learning tool for others, here on hub pages.

      And I am thrilled that by standing up for yourself in an assertive, fact filled, well documented, unemotional (during negotiating meetings) manner you were able to achieve a positive outcome in your own situation and will be able to transfer to a new department and salvage the years of service you've already put in toward getting vested in a pension.

      I knew that your manager had chosen the wrong "victim" this time, and you are right, other co-workers develop much respect, and sometimes inspiration and courage when they see someone effectively stand up for their rights.

      Hopefully, that will be the final outcome regarding the manager- that she no longer be able to bully workers with impunity.

    • Denise Handlon profile imageAUTHOR

      Denise Handlon 

      9 years ago from North Carolina

      Ann-Got the hugs, thanks so much! :) Yes, there was much stress, anxiety, even a panic attack or two as this difficulty went from bad to worse. Then, much rallying from friends and much support. It is a HUGE RELIEF and I feel at times like it is still surreal--I had been at the door of dismissal. I'm still pinching myself.

      Marie--thank you, my friend, for passing this on.

      O.B.--I'm glad you found it helpful. Thanks for the vote

    • TheOnlineBlogger profile image


      9 years ago from Cairo, Egypt

      This is a great article and very useful tips.

      voted up!

    • VioletSun profile image


      9 years ago from Oregon/ Name: Marie

      Hi Denise, here is the link. I hired him for counseling sessions over a year ago,he is really good and very kind.

    • annmackiemiller profile image


      9 years ago from Bingley Yorkshire England

      so pleased for you Denise - it must be a load off your shoulders but doesn't take away all the stress and distress this has all cost you.

      sending huggle around the world to you.


    • Denise Handlon profile imageAUTHOR

      Denise Handlon 

      9 years ago from North Carolina

      Marie-thanks for reading. It is a blessing and an unexpected surprise. All of the positive thoughts, energy and prayers were influential I am sure of that.

      I am curious about this hubber and if you feel comfortable sharing it with me send it via my email. Thanks. How awful for him--this was my fear as well. I can just imagine this happening. It makes one feel very paranoid.

    • VioletSun profile image


      9 years ago from Oregon/ Name: Marie

      Denise, What a relief you can transfer to another area, and what an ordeal. Glad it's over for you! A hubber who is a social worker and had decades of service doing counseling work, was fired on the spot I believe two years ago, because he broke a rule, and he is at an age where he could not find another position. (61). It created a financial burden for both him and his wife.

      Your article is right on! Documenting everything is crucial.


    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

    Show Details
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)
    ClickscoThis is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy)