Top 10 Best Jobs in the World
European fun merchants First Choice Holidays are looking for one water sports enthusiast (no, not that - the other non freaky type) to jet around the world hurling themselves down blue tubes for money. Their last waterslide tester Tommy Lynch just threw in the towel, literally. He resigned after travelling more than 50,000 km around the world, visiting watermarks. The only real qualities you need for the job are the ability to obey the laws of physics and rate things out of 10. The slipperiest bloke in the running will probably get the nod, so pub up, lads, and get into that wet tunnel of fun.
Man V. Food Host
Seppo guts-ache Adam Richman's job is hosting Man V. Food - a half hour culinary suicide attempt thinly disguised as a reality TV series. Adam's paid to drag a camera crew around the US to record his efforts to consume ridiculously large, spicy, expensive, artery-clogging lunches. In the course of his travels, Richman has chomped his way through a two-kilo steak, the worlds hottest curry, eight breakfast tacos, noodles with five types of chilli, a three and a half litre milkshake, a dorito/hotdog/cheese pie, and a fish sandwich made with six fillets and eight slices of bread. Which brings us to the worlds worst job: cleaning his toilet.
Budweiser UK made one lucky punter's week when they offered him a position as a "beer taster" at music festivals. The duties included drinking beer, and...well, thats it, really. The PR boffins behind the stunt said they were trying to make sure the beer was good enough to serve to the fussy muss on the event line-up. There were plenty of fellas who would've done it for nothing, but Bud chucked the lucky bugger $20,000 for six days piss sinking.
If you're the sort of bloke who's secretly fond of a nice pinot (clam down its a wine) you just can't go past this job. A Californian winery decided to offer $10,000 per month, as well as providing a two-bedroom apartment, for someone to drink wine and tweet about it. Refined pisshead Hardy Wallace got the gig, and as well as being thrilled, emerged after six months, alive and with his heterosexuality intact.
Paid to do Nothing
In 2002, BBC bigwig Mark Thompson ditched his cushy - $300,000 a year gig to take a job over the strew at Channel 4. Even though he had a six-month notice period in his contract, the Beeb sent him home on full pay for the rest of his contract. During that time Thompson picked up a neat $60,000 bumming around the house, gardening and "spending time with that family". Worst of all, the last part turned out to be true, instead of code for blowing his wealth on hookers and coke. After returning to the BBC to be the top dog from 2004 to 2012, he's now CEO of the New York Times.
If you're a midget brickie who thinks his job involves a bit too much heavy lifting, this is for you. New York Sean Kenney bills himself, a little creepily, as a "professional kid", whose full-time duty it is to make giant sculptures out of LEGO. He gets the sweet corporate commissions from companies like Google, Mazda, Nintendo and Samsung, Sean's achievements have included a 150-kilo LEGO polar bear, and his personal collection contains over two million pieces. I reckon the only downside has to be finding about 70,000 of them every week by stepping on them in the dark.
After a Formula-1 career that saw you qualify for only one race, and retire from that race without finishing, most of us would go home and have a long, hard think about whether we're cut out for this fast-driving caper. But not enterprising Algerian Pierre-Henri Raphanel, who managed to channel his pathetic on-track record into a sweet job as Bugatti's test-driver. If there's a better gig out there than zooming around in a 400km/h beaver magnet for money, i am yet to hear of it.
Sydney councils can spend up to seven to eight thousand a month sending lucky private dicks to investigate the antics at unlicensed brothels. In order to shut down the dodgy knock-shops, the authorities have to prove they're doing the dirty. So some highly-qualified bloke is sent in there to get polished by an expert "masseuse", then rat on them in court. Their fee for investigating a single brothel? About $1500. You may now puke in jealously.
Fake Foreign Executive
Want to get all the perks of being a business honcho without having to worry about budgets, spreadsheets and whatever it is that suit wearers think about all day. The solution is simple - just bugger off to China and be a white man. Companies in the People's Republic are paying pale blokes a grand a week to smile, shake hands and give speeches, all so they can look like they've gotten in with slick, rich, foreign businessmen. Us fella Mitch Moxley bagged a gig as a "face man". "You'd be amazed how often this happens," he says. "For a few days, we sat in the office swatting flies and reading magazines.
Professional Prostitute Tester
Chilean bloke Jamie Rascone is a DJ, male model and prostitute tester. Yes, you read that correctly. When a top class brothel run by Madam Fiorella is hiring, the final, practical stage of the interview is taken care of by Jamie. One on one. If they don't gyrate, groan, moan and move to Jamie's liking, they're kicked back onto the street of Santiago. Jamie's official title is Director of Quality Control, and it;s so draining he can only work once a month, poor bloke, testing about 70 hopeful hookers a year. This is after they've already made it through the interviews, psychological testing and photo session. At least you know he stands behind his product.