A Guide For Dressing Professionally At Work

Listen up! In the workplace conducting business, I've noticed a trend toward a lack of professionalism. It's called "baring skin" in the workplace. Look, I may be the ‘Old Chicken' on the block, but dressing like a nightclub princess while conducting business is tasteless.

Let me give you an example. Those plunging necklines....really! Is it necessary to reveal half your boobs working at the check out stand? Every time you bend over, a patron gets a clear shot. It's distracting, annoying, and unprofessional. Unless, that is, you're a male customer who's looking for a cheap thrill. What kind of message does it send to the customer? (Yeah, I know, Erin Brockovich was successful). Are you really so insecure? Do you need to show half your boobs to get noticed?

Here's one that really takes the taco - wearing leotards and tights to the office! The shirt fits like a snakeskin and the pants (may as well be tights) are so snug you can see a pimple on the butt! Every time you walk by, someone stares. But don't worry. Those who stare do it after you've walked past so they can watch your butt move from behind. What happened to the dress code?

Ah! Get a load of this: an advertising Account Executive came to my office looking like Mary Kay. I'm not kidding. She was promoting country music for her radio station and the chick was so overdressed it was unreal! The makeup was perfect, just an inch thick. She had rings on every finger, giant gold hoopy earrings, and the biggest chunk of gold chain around her neck I ever saw! When she walked in my office all I saw was' very shiny, very sparkly'. My eyes locked onto the hunk of gold around her neck and I wondered what else it was used for. Her dress was okay, but her accessories weighted her down like an Egyptian mummy! I couldn't take her seriously. Okay, so she wanted me to buy advertising on a country music station. I didn't buy the ad.

Then, there's the spaghetti strap tops. Now these are nice for the beach. But in the office? The first time a sales "professional" came to my office wearing a top like this, I thought ,"Where's the sleeves? This must be a ‘factory second' shirt with a brand label".

Not to mention the little puffs of skin bulging out the sides. Let's keep the bathing suit at the beach, okay?

What happened to wearing panty hose? (Seems like nobody's wearing them anymore unless you're over 50). I know they're "hot and uncomfortable", but if you work in an air conditioned office how long do you have to bare (HA) the heat? From your car to the office. Okay, so I'm being a prude about the pantyhose. As long as you have smooth, tanned, airbrushed legs, you can still look professional without wearing panty hose, unless you're over 50 and need to cover those spider veins. I still insist that pantyhose look more professional. But don't your feet get all hot and sweaty with blisters from going without hose?

Now let's get real. What looks professional? Coming from the Old Chicken on the block, I say a blazer or vest and slacks in a more casual work setting. How about Khaki slacks with a blouse (buttoned)? Not to the neck, ding-a-ling, but not below the boobs, either. You can spruce it up with a cool looking scarf. I know it makes a difference where you work. I wouldn't expect somebody who works on a construction site to wear slacks. Appropriate dress on the job is not that hard to figure out. It makes sense. Corporate job: business suit (minus the plunging neckline and bulging boobs). Casual office: Khakis and accessories. Blue collar: jeans in the office and out. It all depends on the job.

I don't claim to be an expert. But I believe the definition of "professional dress" doesn't mean the same in the 21^st century as it did before 2000. The new generation has been conditioned to accept more revealing attire as a ‘norm'. Just remember, 30 years ago it was taboo. I guess I'm having a hard time accepting it, but I strongly believe that what we wear reveals something about who we are. If you're attempting to conduct business professionally, don't you want to complete the transaction based on your ability, NOT centered on how much of your body you reveal? Think about it.

I know I'm going to make some people really mad with this article. So, it's okay to disagree. I just want people to see the other side of the picture. Hey! And maybe there's still a few folks out there who may agree with me! (But not under 40). That's right, us ‘Old Chickens' just aren't ‘with it'. But that's okay, too.