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Boshemia's Bohemia: Who am I?
Greetings and Salutations!
"None of us really changes over time; we only become more fully what we are." ~ Lestat
Thank you for stopping by my little home on Squidoo. You'll find me at various places across the net writing articles, fiction, and whatever else catches my fancy. I love writing, my specialties are self-help and philosophy but I am always finding new areas to study and share with others.
Standard about me stuff:
My name is Ayngel. I've been active online since 1999, and sharing my writing online since 2001.
I live in a tiny little town in southwestern Colorado called Nucla. It is two hours from the nearest stoplight. We have over 700 residents, and I love most of them dearly. I grew up between here, and Farmington, New Mexico, but Nucla will always be my hometown.
I am a 36 year old writer, graphic designer, and internet researcher. My interests range across a variety of subjects, psychology, sociology, religion, mythology, advocacy, law enforcement and the justice system.
I've been through a lot for one lifetime, some good some bad, but I wouldn't change a single thing. Every moment leading up to this one has helped me become the person I am today, and overall I have been truly blessed...
I am anything but normal, in fact most people don't quite know how to take me. My mouth runs non-stop and is often three steps ahead of my brain. The word prolific has been used more than once in describing me, and that applies to many areas of my life, but especially my use of words whether vocally or in writing.
Living for those you love...
After my divorce I was determined to stay single for the rest of my life, which as you know is a guarantee that you will meet someone right around the next corner. Two months after I swore off men, the most amazing man walked into my life.
I adore my husband for so many reasons. Before I met him I had no idea what it was like to actually be cherished. He spoils me rotten. He washes my hair for me. As silly as that sounds, that is how I knew it was love.
More than that he puts up with me. I have no problem admitting that I am not the easiest person to live with, but he takes my oddness in stride. We have been married almost seven years, and anyone who can live with eccentric old me for that long has to be pretty awesome. I am a very, very lucky woman.
I live my life for those I love. I am a mother of three, step-mother to one. My children are my life, and I don't apologize for it. I take my responsibilities as a parent very seriously, I brought them into this world and it is my responsibility to help them navigate it.
Brooke is 17, she is bright, funny, and very responsible for her age. I am very proud of the path she has chosen for her life and the decisions she is making to get her there. She just returned from living in Germany with her father and co-mom finishing up school, she plans to be a fully licensed cosmetologist after graduation.
Justin is 14, his is my serious little man. His compassion for others never ceases to amaze me, he will give his last dollar to help a stranger in need. When I ask why he did it, he tells me that they needed it more than he did. He is staying with his dad now to attend school.
Mystery is 12, and she is always happy and bouncing through life. Everyone is her best friend, and as far as she is concerned life is always good. She was somehow born with positive thinking in her blood and rarely allows anything to get her down. If she has a bad day she announces that she is just going to start her day over, and she does!
Jaid is 11 and looks just like her Daddy. Her father and I have been together since she was a year and a half old, and I love her very much. She is a sweet child and does her best to pitch in and help without ever being asked. When she is away, our family just isn't quite complete.
My kids amaze me every single day. They don't really act or think like most kids. They use words like constitutional and civil rights in daily conversation. They can easily discuss politics and religion with adults, and love Shakespeare and Broadway.
They share my love of psychology, and philosophy and use it on me when I forget my positive thinking. I get scolded if I show even an ounce of negativity!
My kids are my greatest accomplishment. They all strive to make the world a better place in their own little way and that makes me proud. They are honest, compassionate, strong and independent. I am proud of all of my little ones.
The rest of my family...
I am also a pet lover, famous for taking in any stray I can find.
Currently our life revolves around two spoiled dogs, WannaBe the ten pound terrier terror, and Kane the pacifist rott-en-weiler. Our dogs are every bit a part of our family, my kids refer to them as siblings. I love their individual personalities and have quickly learned why they say people with pets live longer, they know when we are sad or scared, and do their best to cheer us up. Most of all they make us laugh!
We also have Sayuri, the evil dumpster kitteh. She came out from under our dumpster last spring. She was only about three weeks old and barely weighed anything at all. She sucked us in with her cuteness - and there is a new undisputed ruler of our home. She even harasses the Rottie with no fear.
Writing not for a living, but for a life...
I believe in the power of words.
There is a rhythm to words that I am in love with, a power in words that fascinates me. The ability to make people feel specific emotions through nothing more than a few carefully chosen words is one of my greatest joys in life.
I like making people laugh, and sometimes making people cry. I like making people feel anything that leaves them more connected to their life, and the world around them.
I don't write for money, I don't write for fame, I just write because I love doing it. It really is that simple. The process of telling a story, and bringing another person along for the ride is pure beauty to me. I am however attempting to polish a few of my novels and submit them for publication, and so far the feedback has been encouraging.
If you would like to read more of my writing, I am found several places on the net.
Anger or Advocacy
One of my many passions is advocacy.
Anytime someone forces you to do something against your will, you are being victimized, some are worse than others, and everyone handles it their own way.
The only way for me to overcome my own past was to take control of my life back from those who had taken it from me, I had to learn how to control my own life and to be responsible for the consequences of each action I take without fear of failure.
Then I learned to advocate for others. This, more than anything else has restored a sense of balance to my life, has brought everything full circle.
I now advocate for many causes whenever possible, children and youth hold a special place in my heart. So many children are damaged beyond belief by selfish and irresponsible adults. I try to be that one person they can count on to always be a safe place to come when they need to talk. I am a mandated reporter for children at risk, and I take that responsibility seriously.
I am also a trained crisis advocate. Though most of the people we work with are domestic violence and rape survivors, we also deal with depression and suicide prevention. We serve males and females, children and adults, anyone in any situation imaginable that just needs a little help or someone to talk to.
Elder Abuse is another important topic for me. My grandmother (above photo with myself and my mother) has been a victim of elder fraud and abuse for many years. I've seen how someone in a position of trust can not just steal their finances but their security, sense of well being and freedom.
Our elderly population is a treasure that should not be taken lightly. They are one of the most vulnerable sections of our population, and few of them have anyone to protect them.
We can all make a difference in the world, even if we only do it one person at a time.
New News from Nucla
(Update January 2010) My new book 'Sister, Survivor' will be released soon. 'Sister, Survivor' is a book dedicated to all survivors, male and female, young and old. There are many lessons to be learned along the path to healing, but those lessons are there to help us. There may have been shame in being a victim, but being a survivor is something to celebrate.
(Update October 2009) I made it to Giant Squid 100 just as my one year anniversary here at Squidoo came to pass. I have a few purple stars to show for it as well. Thank you Squidoo. You have changed my life in so many ways.
(update July 2009) I'm now a Giant Squid and Ugly Dogs Need Love Too! was the first of my lenses to be honored with a purple star !!! I am honored to be among the top squids in the pool but I'm not done just yet!
Next step Giant 100...
We are moving into our new home at the moment, it's a lot of work but the house is so beautiful! There are so many things to love about our new home, and I'll be sharing pics as soon as we get unpacked and find the camera. *Grins*
My oldest made it home safe and sound after a horrible experience with Greyhound, but I finally got my arms around her and am in the process of making up for ten months of missed snuggles before I have to send her back.
Right now I'm just trying to finish up the move and then catch up on missed rest.
(Update June 2009) I'm going for Giant!
The deadline for the current Giant Challenge is June 30, 2009 and I'm in! I made it to lens #50 as of June 4, so now I wait and pray that the Mighty Squids smile upon me!
On top of that we are finishing up the remodel on the new house and ETA for moving day is the 15th of this month. My husband and a friend will have about 60 work days on the job by the time it is completed... they turned a two bedroom home into a four bedroom with a new living room and remodeled dining area, adding almost 600 sq ft!
The best news of all this month is that my oldest will be home for the summer on the 16th! I have missed her so much, and can't wait to get that girl in my arms again.
So in short... life is AWESOME!
All is Vanity by Charles A. Gilbert
What is All is Vanity and why do I use it as a theme so often?
"All is Vanity" is a painting by Charles A. Gilbert, that at first appears to be a skull, but closer inspection reveals a woman putting on makeup in front of a vanity.
Life ends the same way for all of us, no matter how poor, no matter how rich, no matter where we stand, what we own, or who we know. We don't even get to take it with us, in the end all is vanity... so where should I really spend what little time I have?
We as humans waste a lot of our time on things that don't matter in the long run. Women are terrible about it. We worry about our weight, we worry abut our hair, we worry about our makeup. We worry about jobs, and kids, and bills, and lives.
In the end all is vanity.
What is right here and right now might be all we have in life, nobody knows for sure. If I died tomorrow, I really hope I would leave something worthwhile behind. I'd like to leave laughter. I don't mind leaving a few tears, but most of all I would like to leave something worth remembering.
I'd like to leave a moment, just a moment, that is worth remembering for the rest of your life.
I would like to know I at least changed one life for the better, and I do try.
The rest, to me, is vanity.