Feedback on my articles and how to submit successful to network site

1. 68

   curiousdestinyposted 4 days ago

   Hi, I am relatively new to HubPages and I have submitted a couple of articles.
   
   A few questions to ask for feedback as I can't seem to go beyond my own perspective. Some new pair of eyes would be really good.
   
   
   1. I have this article that was submitted but not featured. I have made a couple of changes but I am puzzled on why it is not featured.
   
   https://hubpages.com/relationships/Succ … hip-Advise
   
   
   2. My articles by far, have been in HubPages. I have attempted to submit some articles to relationship site like PairedLife but have not been successful.
   
   For example this article:
   https://hubpages.com/relationships/karmic-relationship
   
   I really enjoy writing and write during my free time, would love to hear objective feedbacks to improve my writing.
   
   Thank you in advance!

   replyreport
2. 97

   theraggededgeposted 4 days ago

   Hi there, I'll take a look at the first one. It's likely that any issues will apply to all your articles.
   
   Firstly, 'Relationship' occurs twice in the title. It looks clunky. secondly, it is grammatically incorrect. Try, 12 Relationship Tips for Men
   
   There's a spelling error in the url, but that doesn't matter too much. Just make sure you have it right next time.
   
   Be careful of generalisations, such as women 'tend to throw curve balls'. That clearly is not true. That sentence would be enough to make me press the Back button because I can't relate to it. And remember that the majority of your readers will be women.
   
   I'm finding the whole introduction to be be a bit patronising towards men. As though you feel you need to hold their hand. Remember you are addressing grown adults. Implying that relationship issues cause them to lose their sanity is somewhat extreme.
   
   The first three tips are dating advice, which is not what we were led to expect. It kind of works, but you are missing an opportunity to get three articles out of the topic. If someone was hoping to get 12 tips for their long-term relationship issues, they are going to be disappointed to find only six.
   
   I can't go through all the tips, but you should work through them and edit the writing. Try the free app, Hemingway to help you structure your writing and get rid of unnecessary padding.
   
   Make sure your subtitles are in title case and contain a keyword relating to the topic.
   
   Get rid of all those call-out capsules. Use a maximum of three quotes spaced throughout the article.
   
   Ensure you credit your photos and include a link to the source. They must be Creative Commons licensed.
   
   Lots of work to do. Good luck.

   replyreport
   1. 68

      curiousdestinyposted 2 days agoin reply to this

      Thank you so much for your help and what you have commented back is 101% more helpful than trying to figure improvements out on my own. Will certainly relook into this article to improve on it!

      replyreport