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Famous Woody Allen Film Quotes

Updated on February 19, 2012

Woody Allen Quotes

Woody Allen was always a great wit and started to write for gossip columns when he left school.He turned to comedy writing and wrote plays and screenplays as well as directing and starring in films.His many hits included Annie Hall(1977) and Manhattan(1979).

Woody Allen's Best Film Quotes

Sun is bad for you.Everything our parents told us is good is bad.Sun,milk,red meat,college. Stardust memories, 1988.

Sex alleviates tension and love causes it. A Midsummer Night's Sex Comedy, 1982.

Don't listen to what your schoolteacher's tell you.Don't pay attention to that.Just see what they look like and that's how you know what life is really going to be like. Crimes and Misdemeanors, 1990

Love is deep sex is only a few inches. Bullets Over Broadway, 1994

Some one asked me if my dream was to live on in the hearts of my people, and I said I would like to live on in my apartment. And that is really what I would prefer. 1987

To you I am an God I am the loyal opposition. Stardust Memories, 1980

It seems the World was divided into good and bad people.The ones that slept better.....while the bad ones seemed to enjoy the waking hours much more. Side Effects, 1981

Intellectuals are like the Mafia.They only kill their own. Stardust Memories, 1980

I worked with Freud in Vienna. We broke over the concept of penis envy. Freud felt that it should be limited to women. Zelig 1983

The prettiest girls are almost always the most boring, and that's why some people feel there is no God. The Early Essays, 1973

There is this old joke.Two elderly women are in Catskills Mountain resort and one of 'em says "Boy, the food in this place is really terrible."The other one says "Yeah I know,and such small portions."Well essentially that's how I feel about life. Full of loneliness and misery and suffering and unhappiness, and it is all over much too quickly. Annie Hall, 1977

Nothing is sexier than a lapsed Catholic. Alice, 1990

A relationship, I think, is like a shark. You know? It has to constantly move forward or it dies. And I think what we got on our hands is a dead shark.Annie Hall, 1977.

You can't control life. It doesn't wind up perfectly. Only-only art you can control. Art and masturbation. Two areas in which I am an absolute expert.Stardust Memories, 1980.

He left a note. He left a simple little note that said "I've gone out the window." This is a major intellectual and he leaves a note that says "I've gone out the window." He's a role-model. You'd think he'd leave a decent note. Crimes and Misdemeanors, 1990.


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