20 Signs You Have a Terrible Roommate
Just when you least expect it...
Everything has been going along OK. You got accepted into the college you wanted. You bought all the coolest stuff at Target to take to the dorm. You went through a lot of effort filling out your housing information and you've emailed your new roommate all summer. All is going according to plan, when lo and behold, you arrive at college only to find you want to kill your new roommate. You begin to realize that you have a terrible roommate.
Yes, these things do happen. First of all, most people are not terrible. They are just a terrible match as a roommate for you. Plenty of people are just lovely if you never have to live with them. Also, many college roommates are not so bad if you really get to know them. Sometimes you just need to work out the petty problems and learn to live with each other.
However, sometimes you get stuck with someone that is just impossible. You might have a roommate who lives as if she is about to audition for a spot on the show "Hoarders." Everything is cluttered, there is total filth everywhere, and the shared bathroom - you don't even want to know what is going on in there. Perhaps you have a roommate who is a major player and he brings home new girls every night while trying to steal your girlfriend. It is no fun sleeping out in the hallway - or worse - witnessing his activities every night.
So if you are trying to figure out if your roommate is just not for you, but a totally normal person otherwise, or if your roommate is the most terrible roommate ever, check out this helpful list.
The 20 Signs You Have a Terrible Roommate:
- Your roommate waits for you to go away for the weekend. When you return, the entire place is redecorated in a Halloween theme. It is April.
- You can't find your way to the bathroom sink because there are trash bags everywhere. There is also dirty underwear hanging all over the place. And the flies... let's not even talk about the flies.
- You've started to notice your roommate has been creating voodoo dolls for fun. One of them looks a little too much like you.
- Each day, your roommate sneaks in a new pet. So far, there are 5 small dogs, 3 cats, a ferret, 6 birds, 2 lizards, and 9 hamsters. Most of them sleep on or under your bed.
- Your roommate buries you under stuffed animals and pillows every time you try to take a nap.
- Your roommate tries to bury you outside, 6 feet under in the dirt when you try to take a nap.
- Your roommate succeeds burying you 6 feet under while you try to take a nap.
- There is a mystery smell that never seems to go away. When you ask what it is, your roommate tells you it is a secret.
- Your roommate literally never speaks to you, but speaks to others. He just nods at you if you say something.
- Some random person lives in your roommate's closet. Apparently, he is paying your roommate rent.
- Your roommate claims he is an FBI agent. Sometimes he climbs out the window when he thinks "they are coming for him." He never elaborates on who "they" are.
- Your dorm room is filled with mice; however, they are your roommate's pets. She simply does not like to keep them in a cage.
- Your roommate makes food and then leaves it sitting for weeks. She claims it is a science experiment, but you are highly suspicious she is just lazy.
- When you try to cross over to your roommate's side of the room to get something, he begins barking and growling at you.
- Your roommate wears all your clothes without asking. You are a size 2 and your roommate is a size 16.
- You and your roommate sleep in a bunk bed. Your roommate sleeps on top and enjoys dropping things on your head on regular basis and yelling, "Bombs away!" It would not be so bad except he likes to use bowling balls.
- Your roommate uses your toothbrush to clean the toilet.
- Your roommate waters your plants with detergent to get rid of that "annoying soil" smell.
- When you come home one day, you find your roommate installing strobe lights and a disco ball. She is going to charge admission for the dance club she is creating in the middle of your room. She is not even willing to share the profits with you.
- Your roommate is studying taxidermy. Unfortunately, your roommate has a lot of homework and it is done in the dorm room.