The Bully Project
What is Bullying
There are two mainstream types of bullying
- Bullying: “Bullying a pattern of negative acts of aggression towards another individual. It can take many forms. There is an imbalance of power where the victim/target cannot defend himself.”
- Cyber bullying: “Cyberbullying is online social cruelty using cell phones, computers or other electronic devices to humiliate, harass, embarrass or taunt someone with words or images. It may include social-emotional threats or threats of violence.”
Why do people Bully?
Cultural Causes: As we all live in a world where winning and power are so emphasized, would it not be far-fetched to believe that some people find themselves at a point where the only way they can feel like they are in power and/or they are winning at something is to display this type of behavior.
Institutional Causes: If the location the bullying takes place does not have established policy and ramifications for negative behavior…then by avoiding bullying they are actually fostering an environment where bullying can thrive.
Social Issues: In society those who display negative behavior receives much more attention than those who display positive behavior. Maybe as a society we have a standard and if you follow it you are merely doing what you are supposed to do. We seem to expend so much more energy correcting bad behavior, rather than rewarding good behavior.
Family Issues: As stated before, some bully to merely gain attention, though negative attention it is something. Those who bully are often associated with families who have no disciple, structure, or open communication to share their feelings.
The Bully's Personal History: If someone has been constantly rejected and/or has been labeled and treated as a social outcast often return the gestures to others. In other words, this behavior has become learned behavior from their environment.
Having Power: Most everyone likes to display their power, unfortunately some do so in negative ways. But, as the quote from the Superman movie goes; “with great power, comes great responsibility”…one must know how to display that power so that it portrays positive behavior.
Provocative Victims: Sometimes bullying can come from being provoked into doing it, especially if the behavior is not cut off by authorities
Signs of Bullying
Changes in eating and sleeping patters
Frequent tears of anger
Begins to target siblings
Frequently losing money
Comes home with cuts and bruises or hungry
Doesn’t want to go to school
Takes a different route to school
School performance begins to declines
Has a strong need to dominate others
Repeatedly makes fun of the same target
Feel the need control others
Special needs bullied
Effective ways to counter bullying
The victim: find out what is happening, meaning listen to what they have to say without interrupting them. Talk with them without the conversation turning aggressive in nature; remember they are encountering an aggressor every day, so they do not need to have that happen here. Record everything that is being told to you so when you contact the school, work, etc. then you have a list of detailed occurrences that you can provide. Finally, give sound advice informing them that the problem will not just go away, tell them that by staying home will not help but make things worse, and tell them to get involved with a club, group, and sport and surround themselves with positive behavior and a good support system amongst peers.
The aggressor: stay calm while you are digesting the news and remind yourself that the behavior is the problem here, so the behavior should be addressed. Educate them that bullying in inappropriate and society will not tolerate it. Ask them to put themselves in the shoes of the victim, remembering that sometimes this is the case. Assist them identifying why they do it. Brainstorm with them on alternate methods of expending this energy; perhaps they need to get involved with clubs, groups, sports, etc.
Experience in bullying
What do you think is the #1 reason the aggressor bullies?
Works cited and additional resources
Information was gathered from the following resources. You can also visit your applicable school
and ask them to show you their Anti-bullying program.