ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Forever a Telemarketer

Updated on March 13, 2013

I've been working in telemarketing for a long time, about ten years now, and not because it's what I wanted to do when I grew up (who the fuck would?) but because it's the only way I knew how to make any decent money without a proper college education.

I slacked off in high school, blamed it on my parents, my less than ideal upbringing, my angst and financial constraints, and voila - here I am. I had tried going to college, but had a meltdown, couldn't swing it emotionally or monetarily, and moved back in with mom. I then got into working in telemarketing, saved up, moved out, tried going to college several more times but couldn't swing it because of work, and I guess that's where this part of my story begins.

I work for an online "university"; for those of you unfamiliar with the terminology and the mocking parenthetical, it means I work for a for-profit college that offers completely online degrees. The money is fantastic, I'm really good at what I do (using my sales experience and training to get people to enroll), and I got to get my Bachelor's degree for free. Sounds great, right?

I'm sitting in a football field sized call center right now. Our cubicle walls are not quite like the ones you see in most call centers. The walls of the cubicles are low, and you're able to see the entire office from your station. The place is empty. There used to be close to 500 people working here, before the shit hit the fan. At this point, thousands of people have lost their jobs at this company. Most were laid off, but many were fired due to under-performance, and miscellaneous compliance and business needs issues. You see, this company - er, university - blew up in terms of profitability and popularity by being grown on the paradigm of metric-based compensation. In plain English, everybody on the Admissions end of the business had a monthly enrollment goal; they got the number of enrollments they needed to place them in certain tiers of dollars-per-hour pay (for management, they had tiers as well but were on salary). This ultimately turned out to be a disaster. If you dangle a carrot for the horse, the horse is going to run and run and trample over anything in its path to catch that damn carrot (we salespeople are the horse, money is the carrot).

We talk to the most down trodden folks in America. People, like me, from less than ideal upbringings that carry their angst and financial constraints like a badge of stratification that curses them to perpetuating their plights, most unknowingly, few conscious.

We sell them the American dream. We sell them snake oil school.

I am miserable.

I should be grateful, they say. You're living the dream, they say.

This might be the time to mention the fact that I got my degree from this place prior to working here, and I'm straddled with debt I can not repay.

More to come.

Comments

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    No comments yet.

    working

    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://hubpages.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

    Show Details
    Necessary
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Features
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Marketing
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Statistics
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)