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Funny Work Quotes - Sayings About Working

Updated on July 8, 2011

Funny inspirational work quotes

Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance? work quotes

The reason why worry kills more people than work is that more people worry than work sayings.

   I find that a great part of the information I have was acquired by looking up something and finding something else on the way.
  ~Author : Franklin P Adams Great  Working Sayings

Conway's Law: In any organization there will always be one person who knows what is going on - This person must be fired.

The easiest job in the world has to be coroner. Surgery on dead people. What’s the worst thing that could happen? If everything went wrong, maybe you’d get a pulse

   The next best thing to being witty one's self, is to be able to quote another's wit.
  ~Author : Christian Nestell Bovee Popular Sayings

Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I'm not there, I go to work.

Doing nothing is very hard to do…you never know when you’re finished.

Satisfaction Guaranteed or Double Your Garbage Back.

  'These are days you'll remember.' If you recall nothing else from your graduation ceremony, remember you heard the New Jersey Governor quote from 10,000 Maniacs.
  ~Author : Christine Todd Famous Quotes

The trouble with unemployment is that the minute you wake up in the morning you’re on the job.

Whenever you are asked if you can do a job, tell 'em, "Certainly, I can!" Then get busy and find out how to do it.

A good rule of thumb is if you’ve made it to thirty-five and your job still requires you to wear a name tag, you’ve made a serious vocational error.

Business conventions are important because they demonstrate how many people a company can operate without.

I like work: it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours. Funny work quotes

I am a friend of the workingman, I would rather be his friend than be one.



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      related to work quotes 6 years ago

      God gave us two ends - one to sit on and one to think with. Success depends on which one you use. Head you win, tail you lose. ~Author Unknown

      Doors don't slam open. ~John M. Shanahan, The Most Brilliant Thoughts of All Time (In Two Lines or Less)

      About the only thing that comes to us without effort is old age. ~Gloria Pitzer

      Many people think they want things, but they don't really have the strength, the discipline. They are weak. I believe that you get what you want if you want it badly enough. ~Sophia Loren

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      google 6 years ago

      inspiring work quotes

      funny work quotes

      motivational quotes

      job quotes

      funny quotes

      life quotes

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    • profile image

      Mark 6 years ago

      Ha, great list of quotes here!

    • profile image

      Hemingway  6 years ago

      From what we get, we can make a living; what we give, however, makes a life.

      ~Author : Arthur Ashe Nice Quotes

      Virtue is praised but hated. People run away from it, for it is ice-cold and in this world you must keep your feet warm.

      ~Author : Denis Diderot Great Sayings

      Life is too long not to be happy.

      ~Author : Thom Barber Meaningful Sayings

      Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication.

      ~Author : Leonardo DaVinci Wise Quotes

      Humility is not disgraceful, and carries no loss of true pride.

      ~Author : Ernest Hemingway The Old Man and the Sea Motivational Sayings

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      Daryn 5 years ago

      They make a dollar, I make a dime. That's why I shit on company time!

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      works 5 years ago

      If Beethoven had been killed in a plane crash at the age of 22, it would have changed the history of music... and of aviation. Tom Stoppard Popular Quotes

      Friendships that have stood the test of time and change are surely best. Joseph Parry Inspirational Sayings

      Today, there is a drug and alcohol abuse epidemic in this country. And no one is safe from it-not you, not me and certainly not our children, because this epidemic has their names written on it. Nancy Davis Reagan Nice Quotes

      When a man wants to murder a tiger he calls it sport; when a tiger wants to murder him he calls it ferocity. George Bernard Shaw Motivational Sayings

      When you come to a road block, take a detour. Mary Kay Ash Meaningful Sayings

      If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music which he hears, however measured or faraway. Henry David Thoreau Famous Sayings

      Remember! Things in life will not always run smoothly. Sometimes we will be rising toward the heights - then all will seem to reverse itself and start downward. The great fact to remember is that the trend of civilization itself is forever upward, that a line drawn through the middle of the peaks and the valleys of the centuries always has an upward trend. Endicott Peabody Wise Quotes

      There is nothing more frightful than ignorance in action. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe Witty Sayings

      That consciousness is everything and that all things begin with a thought. That we are responsible for our own fate, we reap what we sow, we get what we give, we pull in what we put out. I know these things for sure. Madonna Great Sayings

      Creativity is essentially a lonely art. An even lonelier struggle. To some a blessing. To others a curse. It is in reality the ability to reach inside yourself and drag forth from your very soul an idea. Lou Dorfsman Popular Quotes

      They tell you that you'll lose your mind when you grow older. What they don't tell you is that you won't miss it very much. Malcolm Cowley Inspirational Sayings

      Promptitude is not only a duty, but is also a part of good manners; it is favorable to fortune, reputation, influence, and usefulness; a little attention and energy will form the habit, so as to make it easy and delightful. Charles Simmons Nice Quotes

      Everything was beautiful and nothing hurt. Kurt Vonnegut God Bless You Dr Kevorkian Motivational Sayings

      We not only live among men, but there are airy hosts, blessed spectators, sympathetic lookers-on, that see and know and appreciate our thoughts and feelings and acts. Henry Ward Beecher Meaningful Sayings

      I tended to place my wife under a pedestal. Woody Allen Famous Sayings

      I wish they would only take me as I am. Vincent Van Gogh Wise Quotes

      I cannot forecast to you the action of Russia. It is a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma: but perhaps there is a key. That key is Russian national interest. Sir Winston Churchill Radio speech 1939 Witty Sayings

      How vain is learning unless intelligence go with it. Stobaeus Great Sayings

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      King 5 years ago

      The great thing about television is that if something important happens anywhere in the world, day or night, you can always change the channel. From Taxi Popular Quotes

      If the only prayer you said in your whole life was, 'thank you,' that would suffice. Johannes Meister Eckhart Inspirational Sayings

      He is as mad as a March hare. Miguel de Cervantes Nice Quotes

      Sigmund Freud once said, "What do women want?" The only thing I have learned in fifty-two years is that women want men to stop asking dumb questions like that. Bill Cosby Motivational Sayings

      There is more learning in the question itself than the answer. Andrew Weremy Meaningful Sayings

      Like President Reagan, President Bush has not shied from calling evil by its name or declaring his intention to defeat its latest incarnation, terrorism, just as free men and women of all political persuasions, here and abroad, defeated fascism and communism before. Donald Rumsfeld Ronald Reagan Library and Museum October 10 2003 Famous Sayings

      Never despair but if you do, work on in despair. Edmund Burke Wise Quotes

      All men have an equal right to the free development of their faculties they have an equal right to the impartial protection of the state but it is not true, it is against all the laws of reason and equity, it is against the eternal nature of things, that the indolent man and the laborious man, the spendthrift and the economist, the imprudent and the wise, should obtain and enjoy an equal amount of goods. Victor Cousin Witty Sayings

      More men are killed by overwork than the importance of the world justifies. Rudyard Kipling Great Sayings

      Jerry I am out here for you. You don't know what it's like to be ME out here for YOU. It is an up-at-dawn, pride-swallowing siege that I will never fully tell you about, ok Jerry Maguire Popular Quotes

      Let a short Act of Parliament be passed, placing all street musicians outside the protection of the law, so that any citizen may assail them with stones, sticks, knives, pistols, or bombs without incurring any penalties. George Bernard Shaw Inspirational Sayings

      For aesthetics is the mother of ethics. Were we to choose our leaders on the basis of their reading experience and not their political programs, there would be much less grief on earth. I believe-not empirically, alas, but only theoretically-that for someone who has read a lot of Dickens to shoot his like in the name of an idea is harder than for someone who has read no Dickens. Joseph Brodsky Nice Quotes

      People always call it luck when you've acted more sensibly than they have. Anne Tyler Motivational Sayings

      A poet must need be before his own age, to be even with posterity. James Russell Lowell Meaningful Sayings

      Never say never, for if you live long enough, chances are you will not be able to abide by its restrictions. Never is a long, undependable time, and life is too full of rich possibilities to have restrictions placed upon it. Gloria Swanson Famous Sayings

      Nobody speaks the truth when there is something they must have. Elizabeth Bowen Wise Quotes

      It is a pleasure to give advice, humiliating to need it, normal to ignore it. Author Unknown Witty Sayings

      I have been like a child walking along the shore line. Quickly discarding one sea shell for another of more outward beauty-- never to know the pearl within! Robert Anthony The Man Who Would Never Be King Great Sayings

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      Johnson 4 years ago

      Amusement is the happiness of those who cannot think. Alexander Pope Popular Quotes

      Too often we... enjoy the comfort of opinion without the discomfort of thought. John F Kennedy Inspirational Sayings

      Never esteem anything as of advantage to you that will make you break your word or lose your self-respect. Marcus Aurelius Antoninus Nice Quotes

      If in the last few years you haven't discarded a major opinion or acquired a new one, check your pulse, you may be dead. Frank Gelett Burgess Motivational Sayings

      In prosperity our friends know us in adversity we know our friends. Churton Collins Meaningful Sayings

      Confidence is a plant of slow growth; especially in an aged bosom. Johnson Famous Sayings

      And the wild regrets, and the bloody sweats,

      None knew so well as I:

      For he who lives more lives than one

      More deaths than one must die. Oscar Wilde The Ballad of Reading Gaol Wise Quotes

      I think that somehow, we learn who we really are and then live with that decision. Roosevelt Eleanor Witty Sayings

      The Pig, if I am not mistaken,

      Supplies us sausage, ham, and Bacon.

      Let others say his heart is big,

      I think it stupid of the Pig. Ogden Nash The Pig Great Sayings

      People who insist on telling their dreams are among the terrors of the breakfast table. Max Beerbohm Popular Quotes

      I have known sorrow and learned to aid the wretched. Virgil Inspirational Sayings

      Skepticism is the chastity of the intellect, and it is shameful to surrender it too soon or to the first comer there is nobility in preserving it coolly and proudly through long youth, until at last, in the ripeness of instinct and discretion, it can be safely exchanged for fidelity and happiness. George Santayana Nice Quotes

      A great many people think they are thinking when they are merely re-arranging their prejudices. William James Motivational Sayings

      Money, we know, will fetch anything and command the service of any man. George Washington Meaningful Sayings

      A college education never hurt anybody who was willing to learn after he got it. Author Unknown Famous Sayings

      I don't fly any awards at the house. Any award you get is usually for something you've done in the past. And I like to keep looking forward. Garth Brooks Wise Quotes

      Divine right went out with the American Revolution and doesn't belong to the White House aides. What meat do they eat that makes them grow so great Sam James Ervin Jr Witty Sayings

      STRATEGY is; A style of thinking, a conscious and deliberate process, an intensive implementation system, the science of insuring FUTURE SUCCESS. Pete Johnson Great Sayings

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