- Education and Science»
- Psychology & Psychiatry
How to spot a Liar: Quickly find out if someone is lying
Lies and lies everywhere.. !!
We all lie and we all have lied, many times in our lives. It may have been something trivial, or perhaps for the greater good. The fact is that we are not so innocent. However, there is a difference between lying and being a compulsive liar. It would be safer for us to build a defense mechanism against such traits and stay away from people who believe that we are cheating. Those who lie are frivolous, we know that a lie requires a series of lies in order to maintain credible statement. The only way to detect lies and catch the liar, is to be a good judge of people and to know their ulterior motive.
Liars of different kinds!
A pathological liar mind to get something and he does it without worrying about the consequences, it is generally manipulative, self-referential and not very empathetic to other people's feelings.
A compulsive liar does not mind to achieve a specific purpose, but out of habit they lie. Simply lie makes him feel better than telling the truth. Compulsive lie usually develops in childhood, in family environments where the lie become necessary, then the lie over time becomes an automatic response.
On a practical level it's really difficult to draw a real difference between these two types of people, because even the compulsive liar,tries to lie to get a result.
Consequences of Lying
By a voluntary and conscious lie, distorting or masking the reality of the facts, to deceive others, we deceive ourselves and it hinders us to be happy.
Lying leads to guilt and guilt disturbs spirituality.
To keep one lie you have to say 10 Lies, that means for a lie you are creating a world of lies that eventually will bring disappointment and frustration.
Sometimes our lie can go wrong and thus hurt those who trust us.
The more you lie is more difficult to discover the liar. When he who conceals the truth finds that his strategy is valid, acts with greater security and reduce the outward signs of nervousness. It will become increasingly difficult to catch them.
The act of lying is easily imitated. It spreads like a disease. On seeing somebody lying, let it be our friends, brother or anyone, we also think "If they can, Why not me too??"
And if who deceives you is someone you trust, one who is admired or wanted - a child, a partner or an idol, generates heavy disappointment, mistrust, loss of reference etc
So there are many reasons to avoid the spread of this noxious culture of deception, but how?
Prevention is the key. And it is essential to educate new generation.
Lying is manageable disease, but is a condition that has harmful effects on others, so it is unnatural to promote it.
But for many it is too late. They have become professional liars. Researches have shown this, there is only one effective way to stop one from lying. That is to give proper punishment. They should think of the consequences the next time. We know very well that forgiveness is not useful for this purpose.
But to put consequences before you need to identify who lie. But How??
How to detect a lie.
14 ways to know who is lying
1. Liars tend to be defensive. Sincere people are often willing to give explanations.
2. Those who lie often control much expression on their face . They smile but without emotion. They show facial expression normalized.
3. Usually they tend to avoid sitting in front of the questioner. Those who tell the truth do not hesitate to get in front.
4. Those who lie control much of hand movements , but move the rest of the body. Sometimes the voice sharpen, breathe deeply and sigh. The sincere emphasize and move their hands to the rhythm of speech. Their natural physiological reactions are shown .
5. People who lie often use vague words to distance themselves emotionally from the facts. For this reason, they often use words like "maybe", "some", "situation" etc..
6. Also often give evasive answers , ask to repeat the question or increase breaks thinking responses. They usually begin with phrases like "because to be honest ..." Those who tell the truth usually respond directly without pauses.
7. Someone sincere may issue inaccuracies but will not hesitate to re-explain if necessary. Those who lie show much resistance. And not only that, they may be avoiding data to try to rectify quickly. These lapses may be accurate clues. It's good to investigate them.
8. It is said that "The eyes that lie do not exist." But it is not completely true. There are many skilled liars out there who manages eye movements effectively.
9. The liars make up stories that never happened and therefore tend to reduce the number of times that explicitly refer to themselves. So be careful, with declines in tone in words like "I," "me," "myself".
10. Liars are much more hesitant about who is telling the truth and in fact tend to stall between one word and another. Eye to the various "um", "er", "errr" and other interstitial sounds that give them time to find details to add to the bootleg version that you are expecting.
11. Those who tell lies should think long and hard before turning out in detail. So they take longer to reply. Be very suspicious if someone breaks too long before you start to answer a specific question, which does not provide a lot of scope for interpretation.
12. Lairs become aggressive if the evidence of their failings placed before them .
13. Habitual liars are intolerant to criticism.
14. One who is lying tends to study the reaction of listener so that he can evaluate his own performance.
To live with a liar is very difficult, but even more difficult is to find a solution.Rarely a liar becomes aware of the damage that his behavior brings to people around him and how it can hurt the people who love him.
How to deal with a lair?
The first rule is not to go along for no reason.You must never allow his lies give a positive result.A good approach is to develop a climate of trust. We encourage our children to tell us everything: the good and bad that has happened at school, with friends ... only then we will be getting used to not hide anything and trust us.It will be a very long process and unpleasant, but remember: you can leave at any time the liar to his fate!