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Jesus Was an Astronaut

Updated on December 7, 2013
dead ringer for a craft and not a star
dead ringer for a craft and not a star
note the spotlight from the mothership
note the spotlight from the mothership

I believe Jesus was an astronaut and not the Son of God, unless God is an alien, a real living thing, on another planet.

Whether or not you believe in God and the Bible and the Gospels and all the stuff that goes with it, it is a widely documented fact that Jesus did exist.

He was indeed born 2000 years ago, through whether that is 1950 years or 2020 years is open to interpretation. The absence of documentation relating to his birth, like a birth certificate, leaves those details cloudy.

Remember what the bible says about his birth. The shepherds were tending their sheep, when abright star appeared in the east, followed by the three wise men. They were following this star, knowing it would lead to the place Jesus would be born.

What stars do you know that move in such a way in the night sky that they can be followed? Even man-made satellites that float in space orbit round the planet could not be followed, especially by 3 men on Earth on camels, assuming they were on camels and not on foot – that would be even more difficult.

It was a bright star. We all know that the brighter a star is, the closer it is to Earth. It must also have been pretty big – again size is relative. I am tempted to think it was a craft not more than 500’ off the ground.

There were no street lights in those days. Night darkness was absolute, except for the odd campfire, so a hovering spacecraft could easily be mistaken for a star.

Now I don’t know if Mary and Joseph were aliens too, or if just one or neither of them was.

But I do have difficulty understanding why Joseph accepted Mary’s pregnancy excuse that she was carrying the Son of God.

Can you imagine telling your man that and him believing it?

I haven’t read the Bible stories in a long time, but I do believe either Joseph, Mary or both, were told in a dream that she was carrying the son of God. And again they believed it.

I think they had too much waccy baccy or something myself.

Of course, it could be an alien method of communication of some sort; perhaps a form of hypnosis?

Jesus born in a stable while the mothership hovered overhead

So, Jesus was born in a stable because there was no room at the inn.

It brings you back to wondering why the aliens didn’t just wheech baby Jesus up in their craft and take him away to their own planet?

Perhaps indeed, Mary was his mother but that his real father was an alien.

And Mary told him to GTF with his fancy ideas about taking the baby away to another planet, who knows? I don’t know much about aliens, but there aren’t many mothers who would let the father take her baby away.

So Jesus was born and survived King Herod’s slaughter of baby boys thanks to, was is Moses? (the bullrush’s story). Methinks there was a bit of divine intervention there. Perhaps the mother ship cloaked him or something.

He grew up and performed miracles. Well, he would do if he was an alien. Obviously aliens are much more advanced than us – they have probably worked out how to use all parts of a human brain among other things.

You do know that we only use a fraction of our brain’s capacity and scientists can’t figure out what the rest of the grey matter is for?

He turned water into wine; he cured disease including leprosy – they still can’t cure leprosy today, so that was no mean feat.

I’m sure regular Bible readers could quote a lot more miracles, but I doubt if that makes him the son of God. Surely that just makes him bloody clever – definitely from an advanced species.

Oh there was the story of the loaves and the fishes where he fed a cast of thousands with next to nothing. He should return to Biafra, he’d do some real good there with that trick.

Jesus on the cross
Jesus on the cross

Jesus was crucified

He was treated pretty badly though by the people on Earth.

I mean they nailed him to a cross and hung him there until he died. Crucifixion is one of the worst deaths ever.

Then they took him down and sealed his body in a cave.

Well of course, his real family came and took him away to give him a proper burial. They must have been heartbroken which probably explains why nowadays they avoid Planet Earth like the plague!

But what did we do? We built a whole religion out of his life and death. We decided he went up to Heaven to be with God after his death, that he ‘rose again’.

No he didn’t. Well yes he did but not in the sense religionists think. His family took him away, yes, ‘up there’, towards ‘The Heavens’ which is of course, as we now know, space (the final frontier).


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    • IzzyM profile imageAUTHOR


      7 years ago from UK

      Sirius as in the dog star? I think they made a mistake there, because Sirius is a star and not a planet, but you never know, historically it might have been a planet that went supernova? Then their inhabitants might have moved here...who knows?

    • Nell Rose profile image

      Nell Rose 

      7 years ago from England

      Hi, love your take on it Izzy, you never know, did you know that a tribe in the Amazon or was it africa, can't remember, actually have cave paintings and run their 'religion' around the fact that their gods came from sirius? and no jokes about you cannot be serius! ha ha

    • IzzyM profile imageAUTHOR


      7 years ago from UK

      I aim to please :)

    • Wesman Todd Shaw profile image

      Wesman Todd Shaw 

      7 years ago from Kaufman, Texas

      Well I can certainly say that I found this entertaining!

    • IzzyM profile imageAUTHOR


      7 years ago from UK

      The birth certificate comment was more flippant than meaningful, but it does highlight the fact that births and deaths were not so well documented as the are today.

    • Teddletonmr profile image

      Mike Teddleton 

      7 years ago from Midwest USA

      Thank goodness we all have our free will, we can believe how we so choose.

      Enteresting presentation IzzyM. Alien astronaut, or time travler, Jesus lived on this world before folks understood such things. As for a birth certificate, did any common people of that period have those types of records?

      Injoyed the read, thanks for sharing your thoughts. Mike

    • IzzyM profile imageAUTHOR


      7 years ago from UK

      Never mind the neighbors, I think my partner is from another planet! Pity he isn't as nice as Jesus seems to have been. That said, thanks for commenting and for not ridiculing what I believe :)

    • bearclawmedia profile image


      7 years ago from Mining Planet Earth

      A compelling argument to say the least. I think the idea of Jesus or even a men like Thomas Jefferson, anyone that has power , is remembered and speaks of, and believes in, the idea of the ideal, is great. They deserve our praise and admiration. Who cares if they are from another planet. Half of my neighbors are from another planet as well. Nice hub………..Bearclaw

    • IzzyM profile imageAUTHOR


      7 years ago from UK

      This is interesting because we all have different beliefs about who or what exactly Jesus was. Personally I think the alien theory is more likely than time traveller, unless he was an alien time traveller?

    • aguasilver profile image

      John Harper 

      7 years ago from Malaga, Spain

      Hi Izzy,

      Yep, before I came to know Christ, I worked on a story that He was a time traveller, which fits the bill very well and actually is easier to present than your take on things.

      I guess in a way He is a time traveller, as time has no part in eternity or our ability to move around in space and time once we break free of this mortal coil and return to spirit.

      But the truly relevant point is, even if He is a top dog member of a superior alien race, He deserves our attention, because He has managed to influence our world for the last two thousand years, and He told us He was coming back to tie matters up any time now.

      Sophia Angelique, why ask for the comment to be removed once read, it's hardly a top secret opinion!

      Secularists have been peddling it for years.

    • IzzyM profile imageAUTHOR


      7 years ago from UK

      Is there not some ancient scrolls or something to say he existed? No birth certificate, that's for sure.

    • profile image

      Sophia Angelique 

      7 years ago

      Actually, Jesus never existed. It was all built of heresay.

    • IzzyM profile imageAUTHOR


      7 years ago from UK

      No probs, Gordon, our personal experiences do shape us :)

    • Gordon Hamilton profile image

      Gordon Hamilton 

      7 years ago from Wishaw, Lanarkshire, United Kingdom

      I didn't mean to criticise you personally, Izzy - I hope you didn't take it that way... :) I am, however, very crabit and irritable when it comes to certain subjects... My fault only and down to long ago personal experiences,,, :)

    • IzzyM profile imageAUTHOR


      7 years ago from UK

      Yes there are believers too, I believe, but I believe that what I believe is believable :)

    • Gordon Hamilton profile image

      Gordon Hamilton 

      7 years ago from Wishaw, Lanarkshire, United Kingdom

      Presume as always you want the truth...??

      Jesus was and is the Son of my God. My Lord and My Saviour...

      I do not need to touch the wounds - I believe and always will...


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