Learning to Love Unconditionally
No matter what relationship it is, with your child, a friend, a sibling or your spouse, loving unconditionally is an important part of building a solid foundation. Loving unconditionally is defined a loving without judgements or limits.
As unconditional love is not easily found in Western culture these days, it is something that most struggle to learn how to do. While modern society suggests that we take revenge for wrong doings, loving unconditionally requires that we forgive and let go of these wrong doings.
Four Elements of Support
- physical support
- emotional support
- mental support
- spiritual support
So How Do You Love Unconditionally?
How is unconditional love shown? Being there, giving support, through thick and thin, no matter what may happen is unconditional love. Allowing someone to be who they truly are, despite what you want for them, is unconditional love.
Being there or being present physically is fairly self explanatory. It simply means that you are there to give them a shoulder to cry on, to listen when they need to talk, to let them know that they are not alone.
It simply means that you are there to give them a shoulder to cry on, to listen when they need to talk, to let them know that they are not alone. This does not always come at convenient times!
Offering mental support to a loved one means that helping them think through their actions, motives, and desires. Let them talk out what is going on, and help them see their options.
To support someone mentally requires you to help your loved one process their thoughts through to all possible outcomes.
Showing someone support emotionally means that you allow them to work out their feelings, being honest and open. Sometimes it can be quite difficult as you allow them to be negative while they work through their feelings and thoughts. Resist the urge to cheer them up. Eventually, they will turn to positivity again.
Often times spiritual support is given through prayer or an offering of healing energy. Sometimes you give this type of support with them, like when you pray with them. Other times this can be done for them, as in sending them thoughts of love and healing energy. This can be done with or without the person's knowledge, but only with their best interests at heart.
Unconditional Love Is Not Spoiling
Many times unconditional love is confused with spoiling. We may love our children unconditionally, and want to get them everything they desire. This is not always a good thing, and often times can actually be harmful to them. Consider what would happen if you let your child eat all the cookies they wanted!
Sometimes You Have to Let Go
Unconditional love is accepting someone for who they are, and loving them just as they are.
When you love someone unconditionally, there may come times when you must "let them go" because they refuse to take the steps to help themselves get better. For example if they are addicted to alcohol, you may need to let them go because they refuse to see their addiction. Often, this mean allowing them to fall and hit bottom, even though it may hurt you to do so. Loving them unconditionally also means that you will be there to help them when they want to try to heal.Overlooking mistakes and containing any judging thoughts is part of unconditional love, while grudges have no part in it at all.
Not Always Easy, But Worth It!
Unconditional love is not always an easy thing to be able to give. There are times when others try our nerves, or make decisions we wish they wouldn't.
Sometimes a bit of self sacrifice is necessary as our choices are not always the same as those we love. Other times we must learn to offer forgiveness for what we see as a wrong doing.
One thing to keep in mind is that loving someone unconditionally is as rewarding for them as it is for you. To see someone become better and grow because of the unconditional love you show them is quite a wonderful reward!
Being able to love unconditionally is a skill well worth having.
Find out more about loving yourself and others at 2Create Your Life.