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How to do Mentoring effectively

Updated on November 11, 2013
jacobkuttyta profile image

Jack has been a freelance writer since 2011 and has been graduated from Indira Gandhi National Open University, Delhi, India

Mentoring

A good listener
A good listener

How to do mentoring effectively

The aim of mentoring is helping a person to attain his or her full potential as a human being. It is not only focused on development of skills, workplace performance and knowledge but also the development of emotional, spiritual and personal growth. A mentor can help the person to overcome career, financial and personal issues and guide him in the right direction with appropriate solutions.

Exposure to electronic and web interactive media has improved the scope of mentoring. Most of the young adults are more informed and educated, are looking for mentors who are capable of handle their problems. Mentors should be experienced and well educated to handle the problems of this modern generation. A mentor has to put extra efforts to identify the limiting or stumbling blocks in the path of the growth of the person and help him to continue his growth journey.

Try to mentor a person when one is not in a need of a mentor is a wast of time and energy.  Generally people will not heed your free advice. I tried to give free advice to my colleague not to put all his savings in the stock market. But he was not in a receptive mode at that time. When the recession hit the stock market in 2008, he lost a lot of his money. Then he came to me asking for some financial advice. He wanted to know where and how to invest. Now he is in a mode to accept some advice. He listened me and took some action by putting some money in the property, some money in his personal development and carrier development etc.

So, when there is no need of a mentor, putting your energy and time to mentor a guy is a waste of time and energy. You will not get any result. 99% of your efforts will go waste. If you put your time and energy in a person who is dead broke and desperately need some guidance, put all your energy and time in that person. You will get 99% results. If you are a result oriented mentor, please scan and ascertain the level of his/her need of mentoring. You may classify high, medium and low level of requirement of mentoring.

If you deal with the high level of requirement, then you will get 75-50% result. Dealing with people who are medium level you get only 50-25% result. Dealing with group who are low level of requirement, you will get only 25-1% of result. A mentor can perform only when the aspirant is passionate for the mentoring.

Mentoring

To build rapport: to be comfortable with the person to share your feelings, issues and also to find solutions. Basically, the one whom you feel approachable. Rapport can be built in a day, in a month or for that matter many years. Also there are cases where the rapport cannot be built at all.Therefore, the the person who takes the plunge to mentor a person shall be capable enough to break the ice between both and thus establish and rapport.

To Listen: the skill is very rarely seen in people, as all want them to be heard by the others .But the mentor has to be a good listener .Not only a good listener, but also while he /she is before their mentee, one should keep a blank mind, not to be judgmental about the other person.Being non-judgmental helps to analyze the issues spoken out by the mentee.The mind should be a blank board. The mentor should let the mentee pour out his /her issues .This helps them to feel relived with their issues and find solutions by themselves.

To elicit the mentee’s own wisdom: many of the times we think that solution is received only when one is provided. But when the mentee pour’s out to his/her mentor, the solution can be checked in the conversation itself. The mentee will definitely be having some options in the mind to work on when the issue is creped in. Its only that the mentee needs a reason to get it out. The reason should be through the mentor. Therefore, if the mentee is allowed to talk and pour out about himself, the options of solutions itself line up. Then the mentor can work around those options in discussion with the mentee.

The mentor does not have to be older, wiser or have specialised knowledge in any field. They need to be skilled in leading a mentoring conversation. This would only come when the mentee would feel that the mentor is approachable. The mentor can as well work with his team together in terms of mentoring them. This is labelled as ‘group mentoring’. Here the mentor can be teamed with several mentees who meet at the same time. A wonderful synergy can develop in this environment. As the mentor poses questions, listens and reflects he or she engages all members of the group into the conversation. Each one has their own experience and insight to share and can draw their own learning from the discussion. This would also help the mentor to keep up the team motivation and morale. Since the major causes for the teams not to perform is due to lack of recognition, motivation and morale.

Qualities of a mentor


There are certain qualities which one should possess effectively doing the job of mentoring.  One of the quality is Patience

As different people holding different culture and values, it is very important to have patience to keep up with the mentee.  Many times you find people go back to their old habits or not taking action in a specified time limit even after repeated reminders.  In such situations, there are chances that you may loose your temper.  Having patience to understand the mentored and maintain good relationship is a good quality a mentor can possess.  Often mentored one would be complaining that the mentor is disturbing them or too much involvement in their day to day activities.   It is better to keep your interaction limited by once in a week or twice.    Some causes demand more interaction in a week.  Mutually agreed number of interaction per week is the better way to avoid such complaints.

If you charge money for doing mentoring, there are chances that you get good response from the client.  If you provide free mentoring, then the clients may take it for granted.  If the client get good results from your mentoring, they may reward you with good gifts in a latter date.  Whatever you do, do it with full heart and full mind.  Who knows when and how you will get paid for.

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    • Maraiya Storm profile image

      Maraiya Storm 

      6 years ago from Prescott, Arizona

      I saw you featured when I first logged on, remembered you were one of my past followers, so went to your site. Was perusing through your various hubs trying to decide which one to read, and I came upon this one which peaked my interest because I am going to be a group mentor soon. Took a coursework to prepare for this mentoring but have't actually started mentoring yet. We don't get paid for mentoring, but you are making me think I could possibly be a paid mentor for some other group in the future. There are certain benefits to doing it without pay, however, as it insures that the mentors are doing it strictly because they love people and want to help them, as opposed to money being their main motivation for doing it.

      The mentoring I'll be doing is to people who are struggling to get up out of poverty and overall improve all aspects of their life. We mentor in groups, where a group of mentors mentor to one person. In the very beginning, we have about two meetings a month. Later, we meet with mentee once a month. We strive to not force our advice on them, but to get them to figure out what to do themselves, to encourage their self-sufficiency. Yet, we do give advice, as well, sensing when that's appropriate. I liked what you said about how as they talk and you listen, they find ideas and direction and solutions as they talk....good point. I think more than anything they just need to talk and have someone listen. But there is a difference between talking to a friend who has the same problems that you do and talking to a mentor who has been there and done that and found a way out of it and can share some things with you that they learned from it. I think that taking some courses in psychology and counseling methods and mentoring methods will help, along with having a good solid spiritual foundation for life within you, as well. One thing that concerns me is that there are so many people out there needing help with all kinds of life problems, and yet many of them don't believe in God, don't have proper moral values and ethics, get involved with the wrong types of people, and then complain that they have all of these problems. They come to you for help if you are some sort of counselor or mentor, and you see that most of their problems would be solved, either quickly or gradually, if they would just develop some good moral values, change who they get involved with, pray to God and read the Bible. But they won't do this. So, their problems will continue on and on. You may be able to help them to budget better and get a job and go to school, but the deep down real causes of poverty are usually some sort of lack of faith, lack of spiritual truth, emptiness, lack of love of self and others. Psychological counseling can help, but without the spiritual lessons and teachings and prayer, also, it only half works.

      Looks like you have lots of interesting hubs which I will try to read in future. My goal is to read one hub every time I log on, as I don't have a lot of time to read lots of hubs every day. I'm spending lots of time right now writing more hubs. Was gone from HubPages for about a year because of lack of computer access, and now I'm back and am writing hubs like crazy, I'm in the flow! Right now I'm working on publishing a hub about healthy diets and losing weight, but want to write more about social work in future. You're giving me the idea to write about mentoring, myself, which I'll probably do once I get into mentoring to people more in near future.

      Glad to see you are doing so well!!

    • jacobkuttyta profile imageAUTHOR

      Siny J 

      8 years ago from Delhi, India

      Thanks Money Glitch for your visit and comment

    • Money Glitch profile image

      Money Glitch 

      8 years ago from Texas

      Mentors are great to have. They can inspire "the greatness" in you. Thanks for the reminder!

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