Everything You Know Is Wrong. This Hub Will Straighten You Out.

I’ve been doing some thinking, and came up with ten ideas that are prevalent in society regarding dating that contribute to domestic violence. Many of these ideas are not discussed. I think it’s so ingrained, most people don’t even think about it. Here they are:

One. Women are taught to seek only men who are potential mates, i.e., men who are older, taller, rich. A woman who flirts with someone much younger than she is, or of a different race, or obviously has no money, is looked at strangely. What’s wrong with enjoying another’s company simply for who they are, rather than what they can potentially do for you?

Two. Women are taught they think they have less value without a man. This attitude is supposed to be uncool now, but notice how single, unattached women are still pitied?

Three. Men and women are taught to hate each other. How many women sneer at men’s favorite pastimes of fixing cars, riding skateboards, or shooting hoops? How many men turn up their noses at cooking and couples dancing? Why can’t we just learn to appreciate what the other loves? We’d get along a lot better then!

Four. People are taught the ghetto culture is “cool”. The Big Island has very little school violence, compared to certain parts of the Mainland, yet they idolize such events as gang bangs and school shootings. I’ve had kids get bug-eyed, begging me to tell them stories about Bad Boys in Oakland, where I’m from. I just put it to them straight; there’s nothing cool or glamorous about living with that sort of thing. It’s DEPRESSING. The only good thing about it is getting out.

Five. Prejudice against homosexuality. If a person finds him or herself to be gay, that person should be free to express it, rather than contorting him or herself to be straight and fooling someone else into marrying them (as in this recent case of the married minister caught with a homosexual prostitute). Also, if someone wants to put down an idea, they call it “gay”. This is major discrimination; if they instead called it “black”, the ACLU would be all over them! If someone doesn’t date on a regular basis, that person is suspected for being “gay”. Even if the person is gay, what’s wrong with that?

Six. Women are taught to control the behavior of others through hidden, devious means, rather than coming right out and asking for what they want. It’s not fair to expect people to read minds; you have an issue, STATE IT!!!

Seven. People are not being taught courtship rites. Anyone attend any teen dances lately? Everyone just stands around, not knowing what to do. Some women have even told me in some nightclubs, the men will just come up and rub against a woman, and if she loses her cool, she could get into trouble! How about teaching people to dance, so this won’t happen! And teach them rules of etiquette, too. I wonder how much of this happens because people just don’t know any better!

Eight. There is tremendous pressure to rush into relationships. All too often, if a man gives a woman the time of day, she starts reading all sorts of things into it, like, “Is he really interested? Is he The One?” Why not just take it for what it is, and if the couple decides to get serious, have an open and honest discussion about it, and both agree?

Nine. Sex is being cheapened. Expecting sex on or by the third date doesn’t add to its quality in the least!

Ten. A lot of unrealistic beliefs are floating around, bringing about things like eating disorders and steroid use. Again, I think a lot of it is due to ignorance. Girls need to get more active; boys need to be taught that as they grow, they’ll develop more muscles without damaging their bodies through steroid use.

Knowledge is increasing at a tremendous rate, but unfortunately, a lot of it is being lost, too. It's important for people to think for themselves, and retain old knowledge while acquiring what's new.