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The Cactoose

Updated on June 27, 2016
A lone Cactoose in rare form. by rlz
A lone Cactoose in rare form. by rlz

Before development and relocating Americans began encroaching on their territory, the Cactoose grew wild throughout many parts of the Southwestern U.S., particularly in the more desolate reaches of desert. Like the camel and the dromedary (its chlorophyll-free evolutionary cousins), it can cover long distances over many days on little or no water. In fact, Cactoose that are too freely watered will eventually blacken, turn mushy, and reflect badly on one's gardening skills.

Having evolved the knack of photosynthesis millenia ago, upon the rare encounter the Cactoose exudes a minty breath, and will often display brightly flowered antlers through the spring mating season.

Unlike some other evolutionary oddities in rickzworld, both genders of these gangly green ungulates sport antlers. While it is a rare regal deer or reindeer buck that displays a 12-point rack, most Cactoose antler racks range from 843 to 917 points (and those points are like needles!).

Here a fine Cactoose is caught in a rare smile — they normally have quite prickly dispositions. And who can blame them? Since the 1950s, numerous young Cactoose have been stolen from their herds by nature-walking Reno kindergartners!

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    • rickzimmerman profile imageAUTHOR

      rickzimmerman 

      8 years ago from Northeast Ohio

      Thanks, Veronica!

    • Veronica Allen profile image

      Veronica Allen 

      8 years ago from Georgia

      How clever and imaginative. I enjoyed this very much.

    • rickzimmerman profile imageAUTHOR

      rickzimmerman 

      8 years ago from Northeast Ohio

      Magic: my daughter, who has grown up with the likes of The Cactoose and his elk ilk, is an artist and cartoonist of quality also, and did (does) enjoy it. Enelle: watch for news of a book collection in the works. ralwus: I've actually unearthed many more related species: the Punkupine, the Reinbird, and the Range Frog, among others. Thanks all, for reading. — RickZ

    • profile image

      ralwus 

      8 years ago

      cousin to the famous BT Evilpants and wild Haggis in Canada I think. fun stuff.

    • Enelle Lamb profile image

      Enelle Lamb 

      8 years ago from Canada's 'California'

      Love the picture! You should expand on this, it really is quite funny.

    • MagicStarER profile image

      MagicStarER 

      8 years ago from Western Kentucky

      LOL! Your kids must love you! :)

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