ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

The Fear of Change

Updated on January 5, 2012

Entering the unknown

All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter another. ~Anatole France

I still remember the time when my husband had asked me to help organize his office as business expanded. I was more than happy to be of assistance, and use my skills to make the improvements. I immediately went to work, redesigned the spaces, moving, removing, adding furniture, and made sure there was going to be better work flow, and everyone would be happier. It was not the case, and i was surprised at what i sensed to be an indifference towards what i had done. It threw me off. I stood my ground, and kept my professional hat on, very tightly that day. It dawned on me, it wasn't really about me, as much as it was about change. The slight adjustment had created so much apprehension, it triggered fears of the 'unknown', of what may happen next. In time, everyone realized we had done what was right, and we managed to build trust in every decision we made.

Change can be a choice or an eventuality that has either occurred, or will yet occur to anyone of us. It defies gender, race, age, social status, and calling. The best, the mightiest and the least amongst us will travel this often unsettling road, with some, more than others. There are no permanent comfort zones in any lifetime. We know it takes only a catastrophic 'earthquake', a tsunami, or a call from a doctor, to change our whole world. We can be happy one day, and the next day, won't know what hit us.

When i was young, i thought of life as a fairytale, and believed i was a princess who would always be protected by her royal dad and handsome prince charming. But, that all went crashing down when the king lost everything and my husband prince messed around with other princesses. My life changed and what i didn't like was that fact that i had no control over anything. It happened. But, looking back now, it was a good thing. I grew up and wised up quickly. Of course there were a lot of struggles, emotionally and psychologically. Thank God for kind and caring souls who saw me through the changes. This is part of the journey, is finding gems of friendships and just goodness along the way.

Why do we fear change? It's facing the unknown, that which is unfamiliar to us. We don't like being removed from what we are used to, even if its a bad relationship. I know of some women who stayed with abusive partners and were more afraid of being alone. Year after year, they lived through their nightmare and just accepted their plight. That is sad. But, there were those who found the courage and the strength in giving up, rather than giving in. There is a point when a decision has to be made, a so called crossroad, when you know, you must make the move. You can stay, or remain status quo, but that decision may eventually 'kill' you, in more ways than one.

Its the same in our business life. We face the realities of a precarious world economy that has affected families in almost every level. But, most of us like to cry foul and complain, asking, demanding for change, from government, our leaders, our spouses, as if they have the power to save us. The truth is, they are just as limited, and probably clueless as to where to find solutions. So, where do we go from there? If they can't bring on this change, who will?

The first place we must go to is within ourselves. We determine if there is a need for change in our life, and if we are willing take the steps to see that happen. Here are a few tips, if you need to make changes.

1.Make the decision, don't look back. Be true to yourself and your conviction.

2.Step out of your comfort zone, which will require from you real determination to move on. If you don't get past this, then you lose.

3.Don't look for a crystal ball, there is none. Do your homework and learn, which is something nobody else will do for you.

4.Evaluate your risks, if there's any. Often what we fear is all in our imagination and are never realities. You can overcome fear, or let it stop you.

5.Think ideas. Brainstorm with trusted friends, or family. You never know what you can come up with.

6.Take the leap. Run. Once you do this, you will actually find just how rewarding it is.

7.Don't stress by looking too far into the future. Make each day count and give it your best shot.

8.Be confident and full of expectations. It never hurts to believe that good things can happen, esp, when you are convinced you are on the right tract.

9.Keep focused. No matter how difficult things may get, stick to your plans and vision.

10.Celebrate your success and breakthrough. It's OK to pat yourself, or blow your own horn, just in case no one else will.

Change can be dreadful. It has a way of putting our lives in a spin, like it did mine. I was married for almost 30 years to a man who had always provided for our family. He was 54 yrs old when was diagnosed with liver cancer, and within 4 months, he was gone. It was drastic and so unexpected, i was not prepared to face life alone. I mourned his death, at the same time, dreaded the uncertainty of my future. In my sorrow and loss, i found a wonderful loving community. Although my faith wavered at times, i found comfort in knowing i was not alone. Despite my doubts, i manage to take some little steps, recover, and redefine who i was.

Change can be threatening and liberating. It's like the seasons, when we make adjustments, but we cannot ignore the beauty and variety it unfolds. It's an inevitable cycle that the heavens purposed, just like every dark night that passes, then brings us, the most glorious morning.


    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment
    • IslandVoice profile imageAUTHOR

      Sylvia Van Velzer 

      8 years ago from Hawaii

      Thanks too htodd.

    • htodd profile image


      8 years ago from United States

      Thanks IslandVoice ..Nice info

    • IslandVoice profile imageAUTHOR

      Sylvia Van Velzer 

      9 years ago from Hawaii

      I shall be reading your hubs and thanks for following!

    • BeiYin profile image


      9 years ago from Ibiza Spain

      I really like your writing style, it comes out of your life and makes it so vivid and enjoyable. It is an important subject to know more about the difficulties with changes. I have written a hub about it.

      I want to read more of your hubs, but I have to leave now...

      I will be a new follower of you, right now! Thanks!

    • IslandVoice profile imageAUTHOR

      Sylvia Van Velzer 

      9 years ago from Hawaii

      Thanks General! I so agree with you. Thanks for the visit and kind comment.

    • GeneralHowitzer profile image

      Gener Geminiano 

      9 years ago from Land of Salt, Philippines

      Great insight about changes, we need to change for our betterment that is the key to survive any elements positive or negative... Thanks for sharing...

    • IslandVoice profile imageAUTHOR

      Sylvia Van Velzer 

      9 years ago from Hawaii

      Thanks skye2day! fear is not from God, for He has not given us timidity, but power, love and a sound mind. You are a blessing as well! God bless.

    • skye2day profile image


      9 years ago from Rocky Mountains

      Hi Island Voice, Thank You for sharing. I know fear but am grateful to say faith replaces fear. It takes practice. You gave awesome tips to avoid the fear. Fear is of the enemy. He comes to steal kill destroy. (False expectations appearing real) Christ is the ONLY word that is concrete, he will carry us. Today I know I have the SWORD 'in his name' the liar has to leave. Fear is real and can take your breath away or freeze you or make one get mad at the creator. That is what the enemy wants. I know this hub touched hurting hearts, Bless you for that. I stand on a scripture "no weapon formed against me shall prosper' is one of my favorite and it helps me to get back to why Jesus went to the cross. I am a new fan.

      I so love Hawaii it is a 'paradise'I felt like I was in heaven when we were there. I hope to go back some day. Blessings Galore sister.

      Read my butterfly transformation hub on change if you get a moment.

    • IslandVoice profile imageAUTHOR

      Sylvia Van Velzer 

      9 years ago from Hawaii

      Frogyfish: Thanks for your very nice words

      Thanks Wmh! Appreciate your visit and comment

    • Wealthmadehealthy profile image


      9 years ago from Somewhere in the Lone Star State

      Wonderful reading in this day of change...Thank you for writing this...

    • IslandVoice profile imageAUTHOR

      Sylvia Van Velzer 

      9 years ago from Hawaii

      Thanks too frogyfish.

    • frogyfish profile image


      9 years ago from Central United States of America

      Very well expressed, and very good reminders that I must keep. Thank you!

    • IslandVoice profile imageAUTHOR

      Sylvia Van Velzer 

      10 years ago from Hawaii

      Cindyvine: Yes, that's for sure! Thanks for your comment.

    • cindyvine profile image

      Cindy Vine 

      10 years ago from Cape Town

      Change is inevitable as nothing stays the same unfortunately.

    • IslandVoice profile imageAUTHOR

      Sylvia Van Velzer 

      10 years ago from Hawaii

      Trish: Thanks for sharing your own dilemma. Such is our one lifetime journey, where some events will just happen, and others we can make choices. I must read your hubs.

    • trish1048 profile image


      10 years ago

      This is beautifully written.  I am one of those who resist change.  It doesn't matter what it is, whether it affects my spending habits, my love life, my family, my professional life or my health.  I tend to get a knee-jerk reaction and my brain scrambles to have to suddenly think of a different way of doing things.  It starts with lots of questions.  Is this the way to go?  Should I talk to someone?  Should I stay with the status-quo?  Eventually, I adjust, and as you mention, realize that sometimes things are beyond our control.

      I certainly can identify with loss.  I lost both parents and my hubby.  They were young when they passed.  Both parents were 59 when they died and my hubby died in an accident at age 36.  I have been single ever since.  I've written about that in my hub Suddenly Alone.

      This journey called life certainly has its bumps and sometimes even ditches.  How we handle them says a lot about our character.  I know I've made some wrong decisions, but who hasn't?  It's the getting beyond the circumstances and moving forward with just a little more wisdom than we had before.

      Great hub, and thanks for sharing :)

    • IslandVoice profile imageAUTHOR

      Sylvia Van Velzer 

      10 years ago from Hawaii

      aka-dj, you are right. It's a much broader topic and i'm sure we have more to address about why we resist and fear change. I can write about my God orchestrated personal journey, maybe next time. Thanks for your input.

    • aka-dj profile image


      10 years ago from Australia

      Good hub. BIG topic. So many fear change, yet it's the one constant in life. It helps if we can take some control of the changes that happen to us. Even better if we let the Author of Life, orchestrate the directions of our life journey.

    • IslandVoice profile imageAUTHOR

      Sylvia Van Velzer 

      10 years ago from Hawaii

      Thanks Sally! It was my pleasure to share a bit of what i understand about the subject of change. It's very timely. Taking the leap is easier said than done for many of us. But, once we've overcome that which stops us from doing it, wow! There;s nothing like being liberated! Thanks for the visit.

    • Sally's Trove profile image


      10 years ago from Southeastern Pennsylvania

      Thank you for using my request to share your insightful thoughts on change. I identify very much with number 6..take the leap. You are so right that once you are actually running and on your way, your fears are on the backburner, or maybe even gone altogether, because you are so busy moving forward.

    • profile image


      10 years ago

      One day at a time

    • IslandVoice profile imageAUTHOR

      Sylvia Van Velzer 

      10 years ago from Hawaii

      Thanks mermaid! It's something we all need to apply in this current situation we all find ourselves.

    • profile image


      10 years ago


    • IslandVoice profile imageAUTHOR

      Sylvia Van Velzer 

      10 years ago from Hawaii

      Thanks so much goldentoad.

    • goldentoad profile image


      10 years ago from Free and running....

      Well said.


    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

    Show Details
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)
    ClickscoThis is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy)