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Things You Can Learn From Me For Free!

Updated on February 12, 2012

Wisdom. I has it.

Source

Yes, it's really free!

I've lived a few years. Decades. When you get to be my age, you just have that feeling that everybody younger just doesn't get it. I don't know how some even function during the day with the lack of knowledge they have. I imagine it's pretty sparse in their head, but I'm here to fill it up! I've seen some things man! Things that can't be unseen. Bad things, BUT I've seen some fluffy bunnies, too! Bunnies are cute. That's the first thing you've learned from me, but wait, there's more! Read on...


  • A skateboard will stop when it hits a rock. The end result will be a short Superman flight into traffic. People will laugh. Your pride won't be the only thing that gets hurt.
  • It's hard to make a fried egg. It's either got that runny white stuff in it because you didn't leave it in the pan long enough, or the yolk is so hard it could be used as a weapon. My advice? Learn to love scrambled eggs.
  • Ladybugs stink. Needs no further explanation.
  • Write down the recipes, quotes, stories, etc. your parents and grandparents share with you. One day they won't be around and you'll forget all their wisdom.
  • The sunrise is worth getting up early for. <---don't end a sentence with a preposition. Two lessons in one!
  • I didn't like smoking. You won't either.
  • It's normal to feel different. Actually, I encourage it! Be different!
  • It's really not about who you know. You just think it is.
  • Everyone needs something to believe in.
  • If you kick a wall and your toenail falls off, another one will grow in its place.
  • A flat tire is not the end of the world. Neither is a broken fingernail or a broken heart.
  • Eating at McDonald's after your weekly weigh-in at Weight Watchers is not a good idea. I was doing good until someone led me down that greasy brick road to those golden arches. I ate those fries and never looked back!
  • Vanilla extract, straight from the bottle, is not as yummy as it smells.
  • When the dreaded Charley Horse strikes a calf muscle, don't jump up and dance around, just stay calm and pull your big toe up and towards you body. You'll pull it right out!
  • A job is not going to come to your house to look for you. Freddy Krueger, Jason, and killer clowns won't either.
  • We all want to be appreciated. We all want to be loved.
  • Not all guys turn into drooling zombies when they see a boob. A pair of boobs is another story.
  • Everyone makes mistakes. Yes, everyone.
  • Not all women are the bossy, whiny, jealous nags you see on TV.
  • Some people are just truly evil. They are here to teach us a lesson. Run.
  • Kindness does matter and it is not a sign of weakness.
  • You're never going to be 18 again, so stop it!
  • Don't like something just because a cute boy likes it. You'll end up with a whole lot of Phish and Radiohead CD's that no one wants!

So, there you have it. My wisdom and it was completely free! I'm sure there's more you don't know, but I'll fill you in as the need arises. Your brain won't hold it all just yet. It's just like with exercise, you need to stretch first so you don't pull a brain muscle. Hope to see you soon!

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    • Tom Koecke profile image

      Tom Koecke 5 years ago from Tacoma, Washington

      I'd like to think I don't make misteaks, but I probably do!

      Fun read!

    • billybuc profile image

      Bill Holland 5 years ago from Olympia, WA

      You had me laughing with the title and it just got funnier from that point on. This is a nice side of you I haven't seen before. Ain't fluff fun? Great job as always.

    • EclecticFusion profile image
      Author

      Lisa 5 years ago from Tennessee

      Tom Koecke, haha! Those sound so yummy! Thanks for reading!

    • EclecticFusion profile image
      Author

      Lisa 5 years ago from Tennessee

      Billy, I'm a big fan of fluff! I just didn't feel like being all serious today. Thanks for the comment!

    • annart profile image

      Ann Carr 5 years ago from SW England

      Good fun! We all know most of these things but it's the way to put it and a great reminder. Voted up and funny. Look forward to reading more.

    • tillsontitan profile image

      Mary Craig 5 years ago from New York

      Great hub with human wisdom. So many things we don't always stop and think about but you made us stop an laugh about them! I love the line that "some people are truly evil and here to teach us a lesson. Run!" Voted up, funny and shared.

    • EclecticFusion profile image
      Author

      Lisa 5 years ago from Tennessee

      annart: Thank you for stopping by and voting! I really appreciate it!

    • EclecticFusion profile image
      Author

      Lisa 5 years ago from Tennessee

      tillsontitan, I'm glad I made you laugh today! Thanks for the votes and for sharing!

    • peoplepower73 profile image

      Mike Russo 5 years ago from Placentia California

      Wisdom to live by. I like the way you took your life experiences and turned them into pearls of wisdom. I too am many decades old and often thinks that I can share my experiences to benefit others.

      Thansk for SHARING

    • EclecticFusion profile image
      Author

      Lisa 5 years ago from Tennessee

      peoplepower73, thank you! I'm sure others would benefit from your experiences. We could all learn a few things!

    • profile image

      lisa.bom 5 years ago

      A good laugh to start my day. And, I may have learned a thing or two.

    • EclecticFusion profile image
      Author

      Lisa 5 years ago from Tennessee

      Lisa, I'm glad I gave you a good laugh and some education today! Have a great day!

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