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Tough Questions to Answer

Updated on May 15, 2012
What do you see?
What do you see?
Do you see the beauty?
Do you see the beauty?
What colors do you want for your life?
What colors do you want for your life?

I used to walk through life thinking that it is black and white. But along the way, I realized there are a lot of gray areas in between. And the most wonderful realization was that we have been given a paint brush, palette and array of colors. Now it is up to us to mix and match and choose what images we want to create.

This request "Tough Questions To Answer" therefore drew my attention. The discovery of the greys and the colors happened because I asked a lot. I reflected a lot. I am a person who likes to ask "why" a lot of times. (I sound like a 4 year old kid...haha maybe deep down I still am or we all are.) And I know that there is also beauty in asking. It is a reflection that one is seeking for something, that one is desiring to understand certain things and more importantly that one is not just going through the motions of life in a state of unawareness.

Do you know where you are going?
Do you know where you are going?
Are you afraid of dying?
Are you afraid of dying?
Are you afraid of losing a loved one?
Are you afraid of losing a loved one?
Do I want to fight for my life or let go?
Do I want to fight for my life or let go?
When you look back at your life, will you be able to look at it with regret or bitterness or with joy and contentment?
When you look back at your life, will you be able to look at it with regret or bitterness or with joy and contentment?

On Living and Dying

On living, "What am I here for? What is the meaning and purpose of my life?" For some, they have already found their meaning and purpose. But for others, this question is still a tough one to answer. And when one doesn't know where one is going, we end up walking through life confused, restless and uncertain.

I know a couple of people whose mom or dad has cancer (stage 4) at this point in their lives. These people are close to my heart. It was very tough to ask questions. But I did ask because it needed to be asked and dealt with. "What do you want to happen now? Where do you think this will all lead to?" and to the other one, "Are you angry at your mom because she is not taking care of herself?" It becomes a tough question because of the uncertainty and the what if's. And death is an issue we sometimes do not like to deal with. And when we have to face it, it can be 'painful.'

When my Grandma was still alive, I asked her what was her 70th birthday wish. She said simply, "I hope to be able to celebrate our diamond anniversary." My grandparents had already celebrated their golden anniversary and diamond anniversary could be celebrated ten years after that. But I asked, "What will happen if you don't get your wish?" That was a tough question. I bit my lip after I said it. I would probably have been reprimanded by an adult if they had heard me for what seemed like a tactless question. Because in effect I was actually asking "What if you die and don't get the chance anymore?"

What is love?
What is love?
Will your love be strong enough to face the challenges of life?
Will your love be strong enough to face the challenges of life?
Does your love bring peace and joy?
Does your love bring peace and joy?
Do you believe that love is eternal?
Do you believe that love is eternal?

On Love

Ahhh, love. There are endless questions about love since the beginning of time. A battered, confused, lonely wife asks herself a tough question, "Will I forgive my husband? Do I have the courage to leave him? What will I do without him?" She stays, hoping he changes. She stays away from people, real friends, who would truthfully tell her that he doesn't love her. Or at least, he doesn't know what love really is. Who will she listen to? More importantly, she must ask herself the toughest question of all. "Does she love herself enough to know that she is worthy of love, that she is worthy to be respected and treated well?"

How one defines love and recognizes love and has experienced love would have a great and major impact on how one shows and expresses love. If we really want the truth, would we be willing to lay down our masks for a little while. Take a good look at the state of our hearts and ask the tough question. "Am I loving myself and others in the best way possible? Is my love giving a positive effect or am I hurting the people close to my heart? If I am, am I willing to change and be more positive?"

Can you forgive those who have hurt & betrayed you?
Can you forgive those who have hurt & betrayed you?
Will you be able to experience joy after the brokenness?
Will you be able to experience joy after the brokenness?
Is there hope for "holes of emptiness and anger" to be mended and healed?
Is there hope for "holes of emptiness and anger" to be mended and healed?

On Forgiveness

A wife watches her husband being killed right in front of her eyes. Her 5- year- old son silently cries as the coffin closes before they bury his father. I've watched that scene in the movies. But it was much more heartbreaking when the wife is my cousin and the litte boy is someone I know, who suddenly had to grow up too soon. People have asked the wife a tough question, "Will you be able to forgive the murderer?" And the question is for her to answer alone. I can't be able to answer it for her. Nor can you. I could only bow my head in grief and held her hand while she grieved.

Thousands of stories are shared about betrayal between friends or couples. Trust lost. Friendship taken apart. Families separated. Hurt pours out like hot lava from a mountain top of anger and resentment. Head pounds in agony and the valleys echo with the toughest questions, "Why?!!! How could you do this to me??!! Why did you do it?!! It would have been easier if it were somebody else?! But why you?!?"

And the mountains are silent. And you just hear your voice..the wailing doesn't stop. "Will you be willing to forgive and forget?"

Why God Why?
Why God Why?
Will I be able to soar through life like an eagle?
Will I be able to soar through life like an eagle?
Will I find rest?
Will I find rest?
Does life really hold peace and contentment?
Does life really hold peace and contentment?

The Beauty in the Questions

I know there are still many questions that surround our lives. As long as we are alive, we will have many questions along the way. There is beauty in the questions because man innately has the gift of curiosity. In asking, the opportunity exists for us to seek for that which is greater and that which helps us become who God has destined for us to be.

Some of these tough questions have been asked maybe by one of you at one time or the other. Or maybe questions related to this questions. I guess what makes it tough is because one is afraid of the answers. It is tough because one is uncertain of the answers. It is tough because sometimes the answers are painful. And oh sometimes it is tough because you need to go out of your "comfort zone" to think and act differently.

But it is worth it. I know because I watched these people went through their grief and moved on. They decided to react in a positive way and looked at things differently. I've watched them grow to be better persons with all the experiences they had to go through. I listened to what my grandma had to say. She had responded to me by saying, "It's okay. If it is time for me to go home, I accept that." I asked, "You will not get mad at God?" She smiled at me. "No, he has been a Kind God. I will accept whatever will be."

I could never forget those words. A few months later, she passed away. And she never got her wish. But I'm not sad because I knew she was okay with it. And I was able to assure her sons and daughters because I knew she was truly okay.

It did pay off to have asked.

Anyhow, i realized that one may not have all the answers to life. But in whatever questions you have, you can choose the answer that leads you to the path of joy and peace. I know it by heart because I too have walked that path. And I have found my peace.

Team Hoyt - Dick and Rick Hoyt : The real story of an inspirational love between a father and a son.

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    • AuraGem profile image

      AuraGem 9 years ago from Victoria, Australia

      A beautifully presented hub! A delight to read!

    • ripplemaker profile image
      Author

      Michelle Simtoco 9 years ago from Cebu, Philippines

      Hi AuraGem! Thanks a heap!

    • MrMarmalade profile image

      MrMarmalade 9 years ago from Sydney

      You are not a four year old Your maturity is showing through. Please do not stop asking the hard questions. Son 1 at 45 is still asking those same questions.

      Thank you

    • ripplemaker profile image
      Author

      Michelle Simtoco 9 years ago from Cebu, Philippines

      Yes sir! Duly noted. :-)

    • Kenny Wordsmith profile image

      Ashok Rajagopalan 9 years ago from Chennai

      You shared so much of yourself, when you wrote about your tough questions. Yes, He's a kind God, as your grandma said, and will do us no harm. One day He will love us so much to take us away.

      Thank you for this hub, which made me feel and think deeply.

    • ripplemaker profile image
      Author

      Michelle Simtoco 9 years ago from Cebu, Philippines

      It made me really think a lot too when I was writing it. :-) Thanks Kenny. And Oh Yes, we not only have a Kind God but the best God there is.

    • Zsuzsy Bee profile image

      Zsuzsy Bee 9 years ago from Ontario/Canada

      Your HUB is a very good read. I love the articles the best that make you think.

      Great HUB

      regards Zsuzsy

    • funride profile image

      Ricardo Nunes 9 years ago from Portugal

      Really a great hub!

      I think the beauty of some questions rely in the fact that there are no answer for them!

      Ohhhhhhh, it´s so good to stop for a while and think!! THANK YOU :-)

    • Bob Ewing profile image

      Bob Ewing 9 years ago from New Brunswick

      An inspirational and encouraging hub, thanks.

    • coolbreeze profile image

      Rik Rodriguez 9 years ago from Hawaii

      Very Nice Thank you !!!!

    • ripplemaker profile image
      Author

      Michelle Simtoco 9 years ago from Cebu, Philippines

      Hi Zsuzsy, me too. I guess that's why I love reading your hubs as well :-)

      Funride, I'm on vacation right now (christmas break), you are so right, it is so good to stop awhile and think.

      Bob & Coolbreeze, thanks for the encouraging words. Uplifting words always makes people want to continue 'soaring.' Thanks so much.

    • Dottie1 profile image

      Dottie1 9 years ago from MA, USA

      A beautiful hub and a delight to read.

    • dayzeebee profile image

      dayzeebee 9 years ago from Cebu, Philippines

      This is one hub that truly create ripples. Looking forward to read about your special relationship with God. I believe the time has come for you to share that too. Am evergrateful to be your friend. Godbless!

    • ripplemaker profile image
      Author

      Michelle Simtoco 9 years ago from Cebu, Philippines

      Thanks Dottie! Dayzeebee, it has been great creating ripples with you. :-) I will do as you ask..write about God and me. :-)

    • LdsNana-AskMormon profile image

      Kathryn Skaggs 9 years ago from Southern California

      Lovely Hub and beautiful article.

      By the way, I now know what to refer to myself as.... A 'ripplemaker', PERFECT! Thanks for defining my life:-)

      tDMg,

      LdsNana

    • MoralsEthics1960 profile image

      MoralsEthics1960 9 years ago from Florida

      You never cease to amaze me as I review your hubs.

      They really make you stop and think.

      So down to earth but yet so brilliantly stated

    • ripplemaker profile image
      Author

      Michelle Simtoco 9 years ago from Cebu, Philippines

      LdsNana and MoralsEthics, your kind words warm my heart. Let's continue to create ripples of love and joy.

    • In The Doghouse profile image

      In The Doghouse 9 years ago from California

      ripplemaker

      Thank-you for this thought provoking HUB. I too, am a person who never stops asking questions. I am always amazed at how eventually they are ALWAYS answered. Keep healing and making ripples.

    • ripplemaker profile image
      Author

      Michelle Simtoco 9 years ago from Cebu, Philippines

      Thank you for your encouraging words. It's wonderful to meet another person who never stops asking questions. :-)

    • dayzeebee profile image

      dayzeebee 9 years ago from Cebu, Philippines

      this is one of the hubs that you took the time to work on and you did well. i still remember the first time you showed me the video of the father and son --that touched me deeply and i'm sure glad you shared it here. hats off

    • ripplemaker profile image
      Author

      Michelle Simtoco 9 years ago from Cebu, Philippines

      The Hoyt story really made me cry. Thanks for dropping by. :)

    • SweetiePie profile image

      SweetiePie 9 years ago from Southern California, USA

      Very inspirational hub Ripplemaker.

    • weblog profile image

      weblog 9 years ago from 1India

      Nice questions and great hub. Thumbs up!!

    • ripplemaker profile image
      Author

      Michelle Simtoco 9 years ago from Cebu, Philippines

      Hi Sweetie Pie and weblog, thanks for reading and commenting. It's always nice to see you Sweetie Pie :) Have a great day ahead of you.

    • SweetiePie profile image

      SweetiePie 9 years ago from Southern California, USA

      I submitted your hub to mixx.com because I thought it was so special. Hopefully you will be seeing some extra traffic for this.

    • ripplemaker profile image
      Author

      Michelle Simtoco 9 years ago from Cebu, Philippines

      Wow, that is truly nice of you Sweetie Pie. (I wonder if you got funnebone's "airbrushed teddy bear" which he asked if he could copy from my hub to give to you. LOL cute hmmm) I am still actually groping in the dark regarding social bookmarking sites. I just started familiarizing with Digg and Stumble Upon. Thanks so much. :)

    • SweetiePie profile image

      SweetiePie 9 years ago from Southern California, USA

      I prefer Mixx because it is easier to use.  Have you tried Facebook yet?  I also promote some of my hubs on there. 

    • ripplemaker profile image
      Author

      Michelle Simtoco 9 years ago from Cebu, Philippines

      I tried to sign up for Mixx last night...well it was 3 am. (Many thoughts running in my head...and had to deal with more tough questions too so was wide awake) Connection wasn't so good so I will try again tonight. Nope, not facebook either hehe I'm that 'bad' when it comes to promoting. I guess I was pretty touched by what you did. It felt like this when In the Doghouse (Diana) recommended me to be featured in the Hubpages newsletter. Thank you for warming my heart.

    • SweetiePie profile image

      SweetiePie 9 years ago from Southern California, USA

      Congratulations on your newsletter recommendation.

    • ripplemaker profile image
      Author

      Michelle Simtoco 9 years ago from Cebu, Philippines

      Yes that was months ago when I only had 16 hubs. Now I have 20. LOL It's pretty slow huh? :)

    • profile image

      bismark 8 years ago

      how to love someone

    • solarcaptain profile image

      mike king 8 years ago from california

      thank you for a super hub

    • ripplemaker profile image
      Author

      Michelle Simtoco 8 years ago from Cebu, Philippines

      thanks solarcaptain! :)

    • emohealer profile image

      Sioux Ramos 7 years ago from South Carolina

      You may not always remember your hubs from long ago, but they are still being found by people like me and are as beautiful now as they were the day they were written. Thank you for the ripples!

    • ripplemaker profile image
      Author

      Michelle Simtoco 7 years ago from Cebu, Philippines

      Hi emohealer, I do remember this hub vividly because it came from the deepest part of me. And I had to laugh out loud...all the why questions are here. LOL Now you know why I was drawn to your hub!!! :-) Thank you for finding this hub and reading it. I appreciate your comments and your friendship. Hugs...

    • Kebennett1 profile image

      Kebennett1 7 years ago from San Bernardino County, California

      Awesome. Heartfelt. Healing. Lasting impression. Thank you.

    • ripplemaker profile image
      Author

      Michelle Simtoco 7 years ago from Cebu, Philippines

      Kebennett: Thank you for reading and commenting. :)

    • glassvisage profile image

      glassvisage 7 years ago from Northern California

      Another wonderful Hub, sweetie. I think what makes these so hard to answer is how personal they are... There are so many "It depends"s that contribute to their difficult in answering. One that I'm personally struggling with is "what is my fire?" What drives me? I have many vague answers, but nothing so concrete as to truly inspire me moment by moment.

    • ripplemaker profile image
      Author

      Michelle Simtoco 7 years ago from Cebu, Philippines

      Glassvisage: Those are things we really think about from time to time esp. when we begin to search for something more. Thanks for dropping by and sharing your thoughts. :) Hope all is well with you!

    • indanila profile image

      Inda Blackwell 7 years ago

      Beautiful hub, I truly enjoyed reading it! What a blessing!

    • ripplemaker profile image
      Author

      Michelle Simtoco 7 years ago from Cebu, Philippines

      Thanks indanila. :)

    • Dechen profile image

      Dechen 7 years ago from Gurgaon

      I enjoyed reading...i can relate myself so much to it...for me the colors were only black and white and the same applied to my outlook in life...

    • fullofwisdom profile image

      fullofwisdom 7 years ago from Miami, Florida

      Well said. I enjoyed reading. Puts a twist on things. I too believe that we ought to learn how to operate in a gray area. Thank you.

    • lilian_sg profile image

      lilian_sg 7 years ago from Singapore

      Definitely tough questions to answer. It would take more than a lifetime to find the answer!

    • ripplemaker profile image
      Author

      Michelle Simtoco 7 years ago from Cebu, Philippines

      Dechen, fullofwisdom and lilian, thanks so much!

    • profile image

      Reagan Magolo Omollo  7 years ago

      Love is better for life.

    • Rossimobis profile image

      Chibuzo Melvin Mobis 7 years ago from Biafra

      Did i get here by accident? This is one life question to me but what if i tell you that i found peace reading this hub therefore, i got to you because it was destined and just like Micky Dee said.."CIRCLE IN OUR CIRCLE".I voted this hub up and what really struck my heart is this...

      "Am I loving myself and others in the best way possible? Is my love giving a positive effect or am I hurting the people close to my heart? If I am, am I willing to change and be more positive?"

    • ripplemaker profile image
      Author

      Michelle Simtoco 7 years ago from Cebu, Philippines

      So much of life is full of miracles...and I am heartened with this truth today. Your beautiful comment gave me joy. Thank you so much Rossimobis.

    • drvosjeca profile image

      drvosjeca 6 years ago

      This is great article...

      I will be your follower from now on :)

      I wonder, how you people manage to make your hubs be allways at such a high rate level, specially when having so much of them? Is this hard to do?

      Im bothering with one site for my friend to bring it to first page of google. Could you please visit it at http://nailtechniciancoursesonline.com and give me some advice? I would like to help her out, becouse this is something that makes her happy.

    • profile image

      Wowasntpectnthis 6 years ago

      um I didn't see this coming a mile away.

    • Amanda40 profile image

      Amanda40 6 years ago from Paris

      Complex issues very much. I would like to find answers to them (

    • Toby Simon profile image

      Toby Simon 6 years ago from Kansas City, Missouri

      Very very good hub! Two Thumbs up!

    • profile image

      Dean Fan 6 years ago

      I find this article quite interesting. Im new here and see there is a lot of good reading here on Hub Pages. I will probably join and try to contribute some good stuff on my own.

    • profile image

      benbes 5 years ago

      is really good to read you, living and dying is a million dollar question, the purpose why we are here is puzzling everyone.

      http://www.homedecorline.net

    • KoffeeKlatch Gals profile image

      Susan Haze 5 years ago from Sunny Florida

      Beautiful hub. You are right on about questions had to answer. Some of them are impossible. Great jo as always.

    • profile image

      cuty_kei 5 years ago

      in the name of love, would you choose you hearts desire or obey your parents advice?

    • ripplemaker profile image
      Author

      Michelle Simtoco 5 years ago from Cebu, Philippines

      cuty: It really depends on the situation. You have to tell me more.

    • profile image

      rita 5 years ago

      my boyfriend is loving another girl.so what should i do

    • profile image

      ok why not ? 5 years ago

      it is though sometimes in life but,,,u know it should be dont reply ,,,, cz i knw the answer

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