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What Makes A Person Mature Define Maturity

Updated on December 10, 2013

Maturity comes in many forms: age, responsibility and socialy.

Mature in age

Depending on whom you ask and at what stage they are in their life everyone has a different perception of what makes a person mature in age. Ask that same person again in ten years and their answer just might change.

Different countries and states have ages of accountability. They must be a certain age to drink, leave home or join the military.

When I was in my twenties I couldn’t wait until I turned thirty so people would take me seriously. I have always looked much younger than I am and felt that if I were older people would stop thinking of me as a kid. It didn’t work.

Thirty was not a magic number that made others see me as an adult. The problem was that most of my friends were eight to ten years older than myself so no matter how old I get to them I will always be a kid.

To a forty year old people in their thirties are kids but to twenty year olds those in their thirties are old.

Age is relevant.

Mature in responsibility

That little boy in a third world country that takes care of his little sister making sure she eats before he does, hides her from danger and provides her with a place to sleep at night is mature. It doesn’t matter that he is only eight years old he has learned the importance of responsibility. If he lives he will be a good provider for his future family.

The young girl that takes care of her siblings as a surrogate mother is also mature.

An adult that does not take responsibility for their children, their job or possessions is immature no matter how old they are.

Those that provide for their families to the best of their ability are mature. They are putting others before themselves and realize the importance of taking care of ones responsibilities.

Socially mature

A person can be mature in age and even mature in responsibilities but not mature socially. This is not to be confused with those that are socially inept. Lacking social skills isn’t the same as being socially immature.

People who are socially immature tend to look for partners much younger than themselves. They don’t relate well with the opposite sex their own age and seem to lack the ability to realize when they look in the mirror how old they really look. Wrinkles, saggy skin and gray hair escapes their radar when on their own body but disgusts them on others.

Men tend to have this more than women. They are the ones chasing women much younger than themselves. These people are the dirty old men or cougars looking for youthful love interests.

Not all May December relationships have a socially immature half, sometimes people just happen to fall in love and weren’t chasing younger people but many times that is the case. Having a younger lover makes them feel more youthful when in fact dating or marrying a much younger person only tends to exaggerate their age.

Youthful or childlike in nature

Some people retain the ability to enjoy life and see things anew with open curiosity. This is not to be confused with immaturity although they can go hand in hand.

Keeping our minds young, willing to learn new things and always looking to the future keeps us young and can be an asset.

Having a playful spirit and being active are good things that should not be confused with immaturity.

Some have been told to act their age. Don’t listen to them. As long as you are mature in the ways that matter being childlike will keep you young.

Date sites that are for mature people

There are dating sites that say they are for mature people. This refers to people of a certain age and maturity doesn't actually have anything to do with the title.

You would have to read their terms of service to find out what age range of members they have. As I said before, age is relevant. One person's mature may be another person's youth.


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    • Pamela N Red profile imageAUTHOR

      Pamela N Red 

      6 years ago from Oklahoma

      Rob, making foolish decisions does not necessarily make a person immature. Maturity is one of those words some have a problem defining.

      I can see how some would think quitting a job to write full time is foolish but if you can make a go of it then you can prove them wrong. There are people who do it so it isn't an outlandish dream.

    • Robwrite profile image


      6 years ago from Oviedo, FL

      Hi Pamela; the definition of maturity is definitely fungible for most people. Taking responsibility is definitely a sign of it.

      I find people often use the word immaature as a way of manipulating people. for instance, I gave up a steady job late in life to be a struggling writer and people tell me I should "grow up" and stop dreaming.

      On the other hand, I have a cousin whos in his fifties and still acts like a wild teenager.

      Good hub; well thought-out.


    • Pamela N Red profile imageAUTHOR

      Pamela N Red 

      6 years ago from Oklahoma

      Thanks for reading, sergs_pogi.

    • sergs_pogi profile image


      6 years ago

      I find this hub impressively insightful. I totally agree with you that taking responsibility at an early age is a sign and a way to develop maturity. Truth really hurts, but perhaps I lack social maturity. This may be due to my life experiences. Thanks, Pamela, for yet another excellent hub. Voted up!

    • Pamela N Red profile imageAUTHOR

      Pamela N Red 

      6 years ago from Oklahoma

      Mann, thank you for reading.

      AEvans, being young at heart will keep us young.

    • AEvans profile image


      6 years ago from SomeWhere Out There

      Clearly defined and well-written. My friends have always been older then me too. So just like you I was always the youngest. As I get older I am still a child at heart. Thank you for this hub! Voted up and shared. :)

    • mann101955 profile image


      6 years ago from TRICHIRAPALLI, TAMIL NADU, INDIA-621216

      I really enjoyed reading this nice hub. Your points are very good.

    • Pamela N Red profile imageAUTHOR

      Pamela N Red 

      6 years ago from Oklahoma

      Angela, you may be familiar with a term we use here, " born old," referring to children that seem to be small adults and bypass childhood. Some of us do that.

    • Angela Blair profile image

      Angela Blair 

      6 years ago from Central Texas

      Very insightful Hub -- those of us who have been instrumental in the raising of our siblings (as your eight-year-old) definitely have an early start on maturity -- that does not, however, mean we're "old" sooner just a bit wiser sooner. Very enjoyable read and voted up! Best/Sis

    • Pamela N Red profile imageAUTHOR

      Pamela N Red 

      6 years ago from Oklahoma

      Sam, that is an old video that's been around a while. I think it's cool. Thanks for reading.

    • sam209 profile image


      6 years ago

      Nice hub! The eight year old taking care of his little sister was a great example of maturity; even at a young age the child knows responsibility! By the way, the video is classic! Caught me off guard. I didn't expect to see older mature people remaking a Who record!!!


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