A Philosophical Opinion About Depression
Not everything´s black and white.
DO NOT PANIC. That comes first of all. Everyone at some point in their life experiences this type of mental situation (I hate calling it a disease as if I had been ill for a decade back in my teenage years) and it is not a crime or harm to anyone to feel this way. I've suffered both depression and insecureness for a whole load of time because of a bad family structure and poor emotional stability/education. I am not going to say things like “change this” or that because I feel like it is a whole load of pressure on your shoulders that you don't need to worry about just now. I think you need to change your perspectives. Focus on things you can change or not change, before focusing on more superficial attributes such as beauty or seeming healthy (most do). Don't worry about it just now, believe me. Being pretty or thin doesn't equal happiness (I've had a chubby phase and I have been everything but sad, given the mental ‘powers’ I acquired thanks to a proper reparenting). I know it because I've felt the same way that you are. Being the one everyone made fun of and played around isn't fun or dignifying; feeling like your world is going apart because of different heavy reasons isn't either. I've considered running away from home on various occasions if that helps you believe me.
But that girl is buried way behind in the past, a different soul now living under my skin to be proud of. I had been given, thanks to my lovely father, a proper reparenting from three to four years and I've learned so much since. I've started not giving fucks about people. I've started to elaborate on my very own opinion about things (not even my crush can change my mind now). I've started taking care of my food diet.
How did I make the change? The answer will surprise you, and if you're very sensible, you might not like what you're about to read. The answer is that I didn't make the transition from weak to stronger in a second. There isn't a secret. There isn't a plan or a magic trick. It's just you. You, and who you are, who you want to be. It's all about understanding who you are and where you want to head, the direction you want to follow. You must spend time with yourself to find these answers.
Let me tell you something. We humans need very little to be happy. We only need food, sleep, and mental health. The rest is secondary. Let's say that people that live in cities surrounded by idiots and having to pay bills, will never be happy if they appear to be insecure or depressed. No one likes that way of living. My theory is that if you are going to depend on debts to live under a roof, that's it, you're doomed. You're going to be exploited forever, and you're lucky if you ever win a lottery or your parents decide to help you economically. The answer is that you don't need anything to be happy other than primary needs and mental health, and the rest is secondary.
I am going to repeat myself just in case you're not taking the previous paragraph seriously. YOU DONT NEED MUCH TO BE HAPPY. I'm not a philosophy teacher, but the Glasgow triangle defends that if you don't have your primary needs covered, you could go an entire day depressed just because you're lacking nutrients or a certain vitamin. Or even water. You could go an entire day being mad or feeling terrible just because you didn't have enough water. Believe me. What's my point? You shouldn't be even considering thinking about happiness if you are not eating well. You can't because your mind is not going to focus on happiness while you're going hungry or lacking sleep. Focus on the important. Just on the primordial things that you can solve. What I'm trying to say is that happiness will come alone if your body doesn't need anything, if its fuel storage is full. It's like a car. When a car is being well taken of and has enough fuel, it will ride just as fine. Having certain colors or stickers is just a decoration, something you can take care of after the main problem is solved. Makes any more sense now?
Next point? Problems. We all have problems. I have problems. Any person reading this too. You too. The difference between the present me and the past me is the way I took care of my problems. The thing is, most of your problems won't stop you from realizing that there's a way for you to be happy. There is, and there will always be. It's universal, free, and accessible. So don't panic! As long as you don't drown yourself in debts or get married, you will be just fine. Chances are, maybe you can fix a big chunk of your problems right now, just by sitting down and coming to terms with them, suffering what you need to suffer and realizing that probably they don't matter as much as they seem. An unrequited crush? A lot of people have crushed on you by now and didn't gather their guts to tell you. Self-esteem? Every man and woman are perfect and unique in their very own adorable way, and who doesn't sees this is either ignorant or is too tired from work. Emotional ups and downs? Make sure you're not surrounded by idiots or taking drugs. If the last one's the case, you better drop that shit now. I'm so tired of listening to a close one taking weed and complaining about how bad everything seems. Bruh, don't do drugs, please just don't. They alter neurological functions and block serotonin (happiness hormone), that's it, period. Don't discuss drugs with me because I've already seen what they do to people twice. And lastly, depression? Do. Not. Go. To. The. Doctor. Don't. It's not an illness that you have to wail and cry over. Please, don't do that to yourself. You are way better than taking pills every day and suffering from side effects that include worse depression than the initial one. You thought the doctor cared about your well-being? Karen, they care about their pockets and their family´s well-being. Just please, don't take pills to be happier. You know what's going to make you happy? To set achievable life goals (with what you can do, and what you do best), to have a balanced diet, to take people who alter you out of your darnit life, to focus on being humble and simple (that way you won't need much, which comes in handy in happiness terms) and to realize that complaining never drives anywhere. This was something hard for me to digest, but complaining doesn't take anywhere. It just holds you back. Life is beautiful, and it's yours to live. Someone holding you back? Out of your life. Something annoying you right in front of your nose? Avoid it. A solvable and realistic problem? Take care of it and leave as it is, no matter how much pain it can cause you. (Seriously, if you're depressed over a crush, don't be. I was once, and it just consumes the best of you and turns you into someone else. I won't accept things like “I used to be like this but now that” or “I'm usually more this or that", no, quit that. Unrequited crushes are forgotten in the end. I've wasted so much time over the matter that I'm ashamed of myself for doing such. Just focus on you, you, you. I prefer to be guilty of selfishness that guilty over wasting my time on people.)
If you want to know how to stop complaining and start your journey into a happier version of you, read the whole article I wrote for you, and also inform yourself on the side effects of drugs and ways of being more optimistic. They are really helpful. Don't waste your time on articles about happiness. Don't. Just look down the ones I told you.
And one last thing. You shouldn't be asking about what happiness means to people. No one knows, are just as lost as you, and pretend to be Gandhi for their own good. You should have your own definition of happiness, what it means to you, and in some beautiful point of your meaningful life, you'll realize that no one does better at loving yourself than you do. Because honey, you don't and shouldn't need anyone else to love you for who you are. Just be you and love yourself and the aesthetic of your awesome and unique life.
Hope this helps anyone. Depressed or non-depressed. I'm off to playing Animal Crossing on my switch after I do my vegan pasta. Later, young and naive explorers of this extravagant adventure that we call life! Don't do drugs ;)
This content reflects the personal opinions of the author. It is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and should not be substituted for impartial fact or advice in legal, political, or personal matters.
© 2020 m a r y k i i