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Entitlement vs. Responsibility

Updated on September 2, 2013

Defining the Entitled, Responsible, and Their Enablers

The Entitled: Those inflicted with the Entitlement Syndrome show symptoms of being overly-pampered, completely dependent upon others, frequently whining about trivial matters, full of jealousy and rage, excusing themselves from physical labor and tasks that require too much thinking, and lacking the ability to lose or fail gracefully. They are, in reality, children in adult bodies. Like children, the Entitled will throw tantrums when they don't get what they want, especially if what they want belongs to someone Responsible. The Entitled are known to sue people simply for disagreeing with them, especially if they think it will fund their elaborate lifestyles for a little while longer. They feel Entitled, not only to what they need, but also to what they want... especially if someone ELSE has worked hard for it. And the fact that someone else worked hard for it makes them drool all the more uncontrollably for it. Their hunger for things they never earned is insatiable.

The only remedy for this disease is self-control. And the only source of self-control is their God-given conscience, which can often be lost altogether if the Entitled do not purge themselves from their Enablers early in life.

Don't get me wrong. Those inflicted with Entitlement Syndrome have great talent! This talent, however, is wasted by using it only to support their addictions to power, fame, and fortune; that is, they concentrate their efforts on rallying support from others so that they don't have to do their own advertising. Their supporters, or Enablers (defined below), are so socially dependent, lazy, gullible, morally barren, and unaware that people ought not to be worshiped that they end up advertising the cause of the Entitled... free of charge! You see, the tools the Entitled use are gossip and lies, sometimes outright and sometimes mixed with half-truths. The Entitled are great at making up catchy slogans, emotional responses and names for opposition that sound good but make no sense about the Responsible. They repeat these over and over again until they have gained the support of like-minded brainless emoters. For added security, the Entitled invent elaborate accusations and assumptions to pin on those blocking their goals (usually the Responsible).

Long-term research shows a common thread among those inflicted with Entitlement Syndrome that they failed to learn Responsibility as children. In many cases, their Responsible parents gave them everything they ever wanted and felt guilty for saying no. Bright as the Entitled are, they caught on to Mom and Dad's weakness, and milked it for all it was worth. As the Entitled turned old enough to leave the nest, one of two things happened: 1.) Their parents' money tree was depleted, and since they knew not how to take responsibility for themselves, they figured out how to get someone else to feel sorry enough for them to satisfy their voracious appetite for More. 2.) The money tree remained alive, and as adults, they were still free to go to Mom and Dad at any time for help. In fact, their wedding gifts were things like cars and houses, so they didn't need to go through the metamorphosis process from Entitled to Responsible.

The Responsible: Hard-working, self-sufficient, independent, resourceful, problem-solving people -- most likely business owners and top employees known and recognized for their hard work, dependability, honesty, creativity and resourcefulness.

Unfortunately, the Responsible frequently endure character defamation, slander, and theft of ideas due the ferocious appetite of the Entitled. However, the Responsible have a built-in advantage that saves them time and again:

Regardless of being robbed, violated, and slandered by the Entitled and their Enablers, the Responsible are intuitively able to pull from the well of their mentoring, which taught them to think for themselves, and their hope, resilience and character triumph over pomp and circumstance.

Since the Responsible care more about supporting their families and raising Responsible children than they do about their own reputation, they have no problem saying "no" to the Entitled. In fact, watching the Enabled throw their infamous tantrums is considered entertaining to the Responsible. You see, the Responsible know inner security, not from social acceptance, but from God's baton of wisdom. They are not interested in pulling others down to get ahead in life, unlike the Entitled and their Enablers.

The Enablers: Small-minded, insecure, cowardly, gullible folks who worship the Entitled and crave their approval. The Enablers claim that they are too busy and are often too impatient to research the sales pitch of the Entitled when questioned by the Responsible about their motives. Therefore, the Enablers will believe almost everything that the Entitled say. It is precisely because the Entitled didn't have to work for what they have, and achieved fame and fortune that way, Enablers often worship the ground that the Entitled walk on. And it is precisely because the Enablers worship the Entitled that Enablers are so high off the ground that they cannot see where they are being led; that they are being duped. Enablers are the wannabes (wanna be liked) who will quickly sell their moral compass to be noticed by the Entitled. Of course, this never really happens. The Entitled are too obsessed with liking themselves to notice Enablers. Sure, the Entitled will use them if they see how it will benefit their cause. But Enablers wouldn't think of accusing the "Worthy" Entitled of stooping that low. Now, don't get me wrong... the Enablers look like normal, intelligent human beings -- until they open their mouths, which is when the Responsible can identify who they really are. In fact, the Entitled have the ability to blend into society, posing as movie stars, musicians, politicians, media anchorpersons, columnists, bloggers, talk-show hosts, scientists, educators, college professors, and seemingly rich (or credit-card-laden) parents, or baby-boomer grandparents (who undermine their miraculously Responsible offspring's parental decisions).

So, who Enables the Responsible? Glad you asked! The Responsible depend upon the same person for EVERYTHING, which brings us to our fourth definition...

GOD: The One ultimately in charge when all is said and done, who wants His dwelling place (heaven) to be filled with willingly Responsible people who understand selfless living, rather than those obsessed with possessions, fame, fortune, and more, more, more! We must be aware that without GOD, being Responsible is not possible. GOD is the only One Who is safe to depend upon in the first place. Perhaps that explains why so many of those who want nothing to do with GOD are afflicted with the Entitlement Syndrome or act as Enablers to the Entitled. Responsible people care about others, but realize they are imperfect, thus attributing this humble deed to to the influence of GOD, Who cared first. But life doesn't matter much either way to the Entitled and/or Enablers who attempt to deny GOD's very existence in exchange for a self-centered lifestyle and a voracious appetite for things, pleasures, and undeserved recognition.

Today's Weather Forcast

WARNING: Heavy tantrums, with clouds of Entitlement and Enabling gusts of wind up to 100 miles and hour are predicted for today's guestbook.

Which one are you?

See results

There's nothing more dangerous than an entitled person with power!

Unfortunately, as time continues, more Entitled Enablers are raising their own children to be just like themselves. But there is hope (no pun intended). You see, the Entitled and their Enablers are usually unaware that they are sick. I grew up in a family of Entitlement-minded Enablers. I could have easily contracted the disease if it were not for God, who inoculated me against the disease. Eventually, He helped me to think for myself so that I could later recognize the dangers of that money tree mentality.

Someone was praying for me. Likewise, we need to pray for our nation and our youth to be intercepted and inoculated by God as well. Keep saying "no" to the Entitled and their Enablers. Tough love is their only hope for survival.

Portrait of a Tantrum

Portrait of a Tantrum
Portrait of a Tantrum

Surely you are responsible, or else you would have left this site by now. Have you ever observed an adult that acts like Opie's spoiled friend? Feel free to tell us briefly about your favorite experience with the Entitled.

Yes. It seems like I see it everywhere I go these days.

Yes. It seems like I see it everywhere I go these days.

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    • TanoCalvenoa 3 years ago

      I've known too many people like this, they're frequently very manipulative and lack a conscience and will betray friends and family if others don't go along with their agenda and their warped view of reality.

    • anonymous 3 years ago

      I have a 1 year old son with an entitled spoiled father and it is a nightmare. He's made my life hell and I worry about his future and the conflict the entitled creates to serve himself. I'm praying my son will take the light side.

    • anonymous 4 years ago

      Sadly I have a sister who screamed at me over the phone for not calling her on her birthday or Christmas. When I explained my husbands nephew died only three days before and I am recovering from cancer she replied "You are my sister. That's just not good enough!" Still reeling from that one when her 14 year old daughter leaves me a voice mail further berating me for my unacceptable lack of contact. Wow! I can let it roll off from strangers but it's tough to know what to do when it's family. She has no idea how normal people live. I wonder if adults in their 50's can actually recover from this serious behavioral problem.

    • Pat Goltz 4 years ago

      The word "entitled" comes from the word "title". A title is legal evidence of a right to something. It doesn't apply to people who have to get the government to steal that to which you have title, and give it to them. They are not ENTITLED to it. They are stealing by proxy.

    • anonymous 5 years ago

      Adult stepson who is still making myself and my husband feel guilty for things that happened to him as a child. He is now 35. He has not worked in 5 years and refuses to take any job that seems to be beneath him, even though his work history is shoddy at best and he never even graduated highschool. Still lives with his mom and acts like everybody needs to constantly help him. Last comment he said to my other stepson was "My dad owes me big time." Sad.... needless to say we do not have much contact with him anymore.

    Nope. I live in a bubble.

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      • nephthys lm 5 years ago

        I decided on bubbles.. because they're spherical, I like bubbles- a natural form of a sphere which proves a point.

        And yes, I do tend to ignore everything outside philosophy...

      Food for Thought: Are Students Entitled to a College Education? - Does this Occupy Wall Street sign hint at entitlement?

      But, what if the money isn't there? What if your parents know they won't be able to pay it back when the student loans come due? Would you put your parents in debt of fifty to possibly over one hundred thousand dollars? What if the government can't pay for it? Would you add to its deficit? What if you can't pay for it? Would you be willing to work your own way through college? What if the occupation of choice doesn't require a degree? What if you would be happier simply going straight to work and learning to save and budget expenses? What if you prefer not to incur debts, especially one that costs more than you'll make in a year upon graduating and getting a job? And are scholarships really what they seem? I happen to know they are not. In spite of three large academic scholarships, a relative of mine went into the same amount of debt as a student on full tuition. I have to admit that I learned some valuable things in junior college while pursuing certifications, but what I learned is not something I couldn't have learned on the internet. Since then, I've learned far more on my own because the interest was there and I could bypass the useless jargon and find out what really matters before some politically-minded professor could kill my enthusiasm. (Anyone?) Today, I am able to secure a job in many areas, all due to self-study. I have gone to several schools and all but finished in many subjects, but I don't think I will ever finish, because I enjoy learning too much. My love for learning didn't happen, however, until I could focus on what I was interested in and stop listening to what others thought I should do with my life. I appreciate their good intentions. But I already knew deep down what I was supposed to do. Never let people tell you that you can't make a living by doing what you love. You can. Your gift will make room for you. Of course, you can't be one of the Entitled or an Enabler. You must be truly gifted and work hard. And if you know you are not good at it, do something you can do that will allow you to be near that which you love. If you notice that someone else is bad at something, speak up. You will not damage anyone's self-esteem by slapping reality to the forefront. You might get some wind in the face temporarily, but you'll be thanked for your honesty later.

      What about my parents' expectations? Well, many parents today are under the assumption that their children MUST go to college. Americans promote this idea with great fervor. This is a myth that the left especially promotes. One of the reasons is that almost every one of today's universities liberally indoctrinate their students, and rarely is a student allowed to disagree without consequence. Professors are encouraged to promote the theory of evolution as fact, Christian white males are discriminated against, and have you ever noticed that there is no Men's Studies Department on campus? Isn't that discrimination? Watch Indoctrinate U and see for yourself.

      What about trade school? What about certification in an area of interest? What about experience in lieu of college? What if you worked your way up the ladder the good "old fashioned" way? You would start out in the black instead of in the red, that's what. The only class worth taking at that point is Dave Ramey's Financial Peace University.

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          anonymous 7 years ago

          Amazing that no one has labeled themselves as the entitled...makes me wonder if they recognize themselves, or if like Narcissus they see themselves in the mirror and fall so deeply in love with what they see that they forget who they really are...hmmm.

        • profile image

          anonymous 7 years ago

          As a responsible atheist, I think you need to reconsider your definitions. It is completely absurd and simply false to say you can't be responsible without having an invisible friend in the sky. In fact, it is directly contradictory to your definition of responsible.

          So in the end you've done nothing but replace financial entitlement with a spiritual entitlement..

        • profile image

          anonymous 6 years ago

          @anonymous: 1) People can be responsible as a self-proclaimed atheist

          2) There is no such thing as truth without an eternal source of truth

          3) Most atheists did not have an emotionally available father

        • sousababy profile image

          sousababy 6 years ago

          Oh thank you so very much for writing this. In my life I have always been amazed at how "common sense is not that common". I have and am still dealing with the "entitled" and I feel like the only adult somedays. Even higher education (like MDs) fall well within the "entitlement" syndrome category. I feel less alone. Thank you for writing this excellent lens. It is a favorite and your writing is excellent. Keep up the good work, you really ARE doing some good in this world. Take Good Care, Rose

        • profile image

          anonymous 6 years ago

          this is very useful for my upcoming essay on this topic . still this doesn't give but so mayn examples or information about it so i can add this to my essay. theres nothing else ive hit everything that there is to say . but this didn't help as much butt the viddeeo was hellpfull in an odd way ? thanksss i guess .

        • Charlino99 profile image

          Tonie Cook 6 years ago from USA

          Bravo. You are not alone in your observations.

        • WhitU4ever profile image
          Author

          WhitU4ever 6 years ago

          For the atheists who responded, denying God is the most irresponsible act there is. By dooing so, you send yourself and everyone that follows your lead to hell.

        • Jack2205 profile image

          Jack2205 6 years ago

          This is an excellent lens. I work (away from Squidoo) with people that think they're entitled and people that enable them.

        • Lynne-Modranski profile image

          Lynne Modranski 5 years ago from Ohio

          My husband and I talk often about those who feel "entitled." My immediate family (as well as my husband's) grew up learning to be responsible, so it becomes very frustrating when we find ourselves working with or listening to the entitled. It's so sad that 90% of them don't even see it as a problem. But you are correct, those who discover Christ and His blessings are able to overcome the entitlement complex and begin to see that we deserve nothing, but the gift of God is free to us anyway! Thanks for sharing!

        • quickcutterss profile image

          Mary 5 years ago from Midwest

          Your lens gives people something to really thing about. Nice lens

          MERRY CHRISTMAS

          AN A GREAT NEW YEAR.

        • WhitU4ever profile image
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          WhitU4ever 5 years ago

          @quickcutterss: Thanks, Quickcutters!

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          pbfinance 5 years ago

          Wow, what a unique lens. Bravo!

        • profile image

          kfres39389 5 years ago

          I was married to an entitled person. I held two jobs, went to school to get a better job, and she wanted me to take on a third job. I slept four hours a day, if that, and I was still expected to carry the majority of the housework. Somehow, she still found ways to make me feel like a failure. Now that I divorced her, I no longer feel like the empty shell of a person that I felt like. Beware sociopaths, they are destructive.

        • Tiggered profile image

          Tiggered 5 years ago

          Us - good, them - baaad... I can't decide whether you are just someone good at heart who seriously wants to make the world a better place for everyone or just a self-righteous preacher who wants to tell everyone how to live their lives... I surely experience your language as highly invasive - I keep wondering whether it's just anger at the way the world is (I know it too well from my own experience) or just a ghastly witch hunting. I hope the kinder version is true!

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          LCTD975 5 years ago

          Great lens! Reminds me of the "king baby" syndrome!

        • WhitU4ever profile image
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          WhitU4ever 5 years ago

          @LCTD975: I had to go and look that one up. You're right... the entitlement mentality is very similar.

        • WhitU4ever profile image
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          WhitU4ever 5 years ago

          @Tiggered: Oh dear. Did this offend you?

        • WhitU4ever profile image
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          WhitU4ever 5 years ago

          @kfres39389: So sorry to hear it didn't work out. God's peace always be yours, regardless of circumstance.

        • WhitU4ever profile image
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          WhitU4ever 5 years ago

          @pbfinance: Thank you, pb!

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          anonymous 4 years ago

          If you were to analyse the Old Testament you clearly see a deity that shows Entitlement issues; narcissistic wrath... destroying civilisations on a rage-fuelled whim, EXPECTING worship, and punishing ruthlessly those that don't obey. The Enablers are those that blindly follow this personification of entitlement, unquestioning the ruthlessness of its assumed authority, and attributing to it notions of 'love' without any demonstrations of that emotionality. The laziness of the enablers in accepting the notion of the bible as an object of historic fact, despite its nonsensicality, hypocrisy, and primitive brutality is utterly unscientific (the realm and hard working endeavours of the responsible). The existence of a divine presence is beyond my capacity to fathom, so I will neither deny nor accept its existence, but I am confident that the attribution of divinity by any world religion is a flawed, misinformed, and an utterly HUMAN interpretation of something beyond human comprehension, and I am certain that notions of all-encompasing love (as attributed to divinity) do not fit with the severity of punishment and persecution attributed to the notion of Hell. My humanism, and my RESPONSIBILITY, stem from reason and the capacity to make rational judgement; to externalise this is to negate the choices and struggles of the individual to overcome parental negativity. Ok my rants over (lol)... now i'll do something more productive!

        • WhitU4ever profile image
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          WhitU4ever 4 years ago

          @anonymous: Thanks for your input, Rob. Now I know which one you are. Anyone who has the guts to deify himself and lower God to the level of a man reveals himself to be infected with a SEVERE case of entitlement mentality.

          The FOOL says in his heart, "There is no God."

          Rob, you didn't just say it in your heart, you said it to the entire world via the internet. I wasn't exaggerating when I described your disease of the mind as SEVERE.

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          anonymous 4 years ago

          As an interesting read

        • Pat Goltz profile image

          Pat Goltz 4 years ago

          Your comments about enablers were very helpful. I have been trying to get a family member to stop supporting the people who think they are entitled, even though he himself is responsible. Now I think I can explain it to him. Thank you!

        • iijuan12 profile image

          iijuan12 4 years ago from Florida

          Great lens!

        • siobhanryan profile image

          siobhanryan 4 years ago

          Absolutely brilliant

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          Mary Norton 4 years ago from Ontario, Canada

          I want to help but I don't want people who think they are entitled.

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          WinWriter 3 years ago

          Wise words indeed. I've dealt with and worked with entitled people - spoiled children.

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          TanoCalvenoa 3 years ago

          This is fantastic. I've known adults who I've thought are exactly as you describe, immature children who throw tantrums if they can't have what they want - but they won't work for it or earn anything, they just want everything given to them.

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