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American Idol Top 8

Updated on March 15, 2011
 

This week they were BORN with the dream of being pop stars on this very stage. They're trying to look for more dramatic ways to say the same thing every week. It's just so Ryan can have a buildup to when he says "This....is...American Idol!" When I watched the show on Tuesday night, I was creeped out by the dude sitting in the front row all stalwart like. I found out later it's some cross-promotional deal at Fox with some other show I don't give a crap about. That's special.

I thought that this episode, overall, was just ok. Songs from the year they were born would have been more interesting if they weren't all born between 1984-1986. Nobody Wang Chung-ed! Oh well, onto the performances.

Danny can put away the paternity test, that's definitely his dad. They look so much alike! I thought that was a weird version of "Stand by Me." I sort of expected him to break out into a rap or something with the way it was building. Instead, Danny took us to church! It was good, but I think it was safe for him. I know Paula loves to dance, but she was over-doing it--maybe she was expecting a little hip-hop action too.

I can't believe I missed Kris at the Santa Monica pier. That's probably best for everyone involved. I don't really feel like going to jail for sexual harassment. Too bad he performed "All She Wants to Do Is Dance" in the bad-luck pit. He shoulda learned from Matt last week. I didn't think it was terrible, a bit weird maybe. When the judges begin their critique with "I'm a big fan of yours" it means they hated that performance. Obviously, Paula showed her dismay by remaining seated instead of cutting a rug. I have to agree that Kris's voice got lost in the band. Simon LOVES the word "indulgent" this season, did he run out of word-of-the-day toilet paper on indulgent day?

Lil's name is Lil; get it right or pay the price! Now that we're all clear on that, I'd like to say her hair looked amazing (in Paula-speak it means her performance wasn't that great). I really expected phenomenal things from her version of "What's Love Got to Do with It?" but I was disappointed by its mediocrity. Sometimes when she sings, I feel like she slows down too much. Since I'm musically handicapped, that's the best explanation I can give for that. She can hit the big notes, but the last note didn't make any sense. Lil has dropped down big time on my list this week, and it was no shock that she was in danger of going home.

GO HEELS! However, Anoop's performance was not that of a champion. Cyndi Lauper's version of "True Colors" is so haunting and his was just solid. He sang well, but I didn't feel the emotion that makes that song a classic. I'm kinda glad that he apologized for acting like a foolclown last week. Of course, Simon says make no apologies. His motto is: Be an ass! It's made him a ton of money. I wasn't really surprised to see ol' Anoop in the bottom 3, either.

Scott attempted to inspire again, this time by using the guitar instead of the piano. I actually liked his vocals on the slow part of the song. Other than that, I don't have anything new to say. It was a boring song like Simon said. However, I like Scott's personality a lot more than Allison's (even though she's a better singer). He's a sweet little geek. He said he wanted to show his versatility before he goes home, but he knew his days were numbered. Later, gator!

I like the song "I Can't Make You Love Me" that Allison chose. I don't have much to say about her either because I get distracted every time she comes on stage. It wasn't bad or anything, I just don't care. Simon is exactly right, her personality is missing. She's a good singer, but people (i.e. me) don't like her. Meh.

Matt's video of him in the angel costume was hilariously adorable. As an adult, I wish they would stop dressing him like Justin Timberlake. It's like they want to make him into a heartthrob, but that means he's not that good looking. On a positive note, I dug his version of "Part-Time Lovers." It was great. What was up with Paula's cheerleader move in lieu of a traditional standing O? Freak.

Adam was not interested in sports as a kid--wow, I wouldn't have guessed that one. I'm sure his parents told stories of Adam wearing his mother's clothes too that got edited. I can only hope it'll be in the DVD extras. He actually gave another screech-free performance this week, and my eardrums thank him! His rendition of "Mad World" creeped me out, but this time it was in a good way. It was haunting (I think my toilet paper is stuck on that word), as it should have been. He went back to the man-bangs, and still managed to keep it under control. Paula wants his junk so bad--I think she's a little off-base.

On the results show, was that Adam's dad directing their Ford video? They had matching coifs. Of course Adam loved the ridiculous costumes. Poor Scott, it was awkward watching him try to sing Britney Spears. At least he did a great impression of Simon. On an unrelated note, the mayor of Kalamazoo, Michigan is Akon's uncle?

Here's the dwindling list (in order of my favorite to the bottom feeders):

Danny Gokey

Matt Giraud

Adam Lambert

Kris Allen

Anoop Desai

Allison Iraheta

Lil Rounds

Scott Macintyre

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