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An Explosive, Elderly-fueled Muscular Movie That Delivers

Updated on March 31, 2013

The Grumpy Old Mercenaries

Antiquated Crew
Antiquated Crew

The Expendables 2

You know you’re in a Stallone action movie when the plot was merely utilized as an excuse to blow things up and pile lifeless bodies after lifeless bodies on screen. The script was well, expendable but the action set pieces in the movie were definitely not. There were plenty of explosions, hand to hand combat, body counts and silly one-liners and dialogues that didn’t let up from start to finish. My favorite scene from the entire movie was the banter between Sly and the almighty bearded one Chuck Norris; who made his glorious comeback on the silver screen by appearing out of nowhere (especially behind a thick smoke and whenever the antiquated crew needed it the most) and spraying bullets at the hapless foot soldiers and inanimate objects at the opposite side of the conflict. The conversation that made me jump out of my seat went something like this:

Sly: “I heard that you’ve been bitten by a king cobra?”

Chuck aka ‘Lone Wolf’: “Yeah I was but after 5 days of agonizing pain, the cobra died.”

Boom!!! That right there is cinematic gold. Whoever thought of that succinct yet highly comical exchanges should receive an award or at least a raise for single-handedly fueling the movie to blockbuster success.

Usually, the sequel is less compelling than the original. Not in the case with Expendables 2 though. This time, the star power was more muscular albeit antiquated and there were plenty of gratuitous fight scenes to keep the viewers entertained in the movie theater. The opening scene was furiously explosive which set up the mood perfectly for the entire film. Van Damme was interesting enough as a villain and though Arnie and Willis seemed to have made a conscious decision to just phone in their performances, it didn’t matter because there was very little acting involved in this picture—which I think is always a good thing for any Stallone movie. My only complaint is that they didn't show Van Damme's decapitated head in the end which honestly left me hanging quite a bit. Come on! This isn’t one of those corny, sanitized kids movies, right? Not that it mattered though because at that point of the film I was already thoroughly entertained.

The audience at the movie theater—including me of course--cheered and laughed the entire time. There were no quiet moments I tell you. This is how an action movie should be made--80's style: visceral, over-the-top and silly with minimal CGI for maximum effect. New movies, take note.

Cinematic Gold!

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