Damon Albarn's gay pink house.(Part one.)
Fame helps you dodge people you hurt.
Alun said, "Damon Albarn is gay!"
Some times, a move to a new area can split a usual group of friends. Overenthusiastic, new admirers do not always go down well with regular friends. Occasionally, destructive jealousy can set in, which is revealed briefly here. This club night out is similar to West Side Story. The regular set of friends arranged to meet and try out the new local pub, which was called, "The County Arms." I had just moved to Highams Park, and I wanted to explore the night life a little. Being a single parent made nights out few and far between. A private function was being held upstairs at the County Arms, and a new band in its most infantile form where playing. I was my usual loud self and started to shout in a playful manner, as no music had yet begun. I shouted, "Lager, lager, lager, mega, mega, white thing." I suppose, I sounded like a typical twenty year old youth, but now I cringe at the bad manners. One of the creative music guys later added my words into one of his music tracks. Like the words in the song, after the new band's music in The County Arms, we did all go to Romford, or was it Ilford?
Well, that was the problem; the once tight group of friends suddenly became split by conflicting choice. I wanted to go to Damon's party, which did not go down at all well with my current group of friends. It felt really wrong to leave my current friends, but after a few drinks, I went to Damon's party. The decision I made, really aggravated my current group of friends, to the point they wanted to break friends, and end friendships, which made no sense to me at the time. I quite quickly became aware, that I also had become rated as unpopular with Damon's friends. There was obviously some negative situation lurking in the background, which I had blindly missed. I guess Damon and I were doomed right from the start. At Damon's house his friends flung strange accusations towards me. (If you want the hidden facts you must read part two, as they are not in part one.) It was now Damon's friends turn to split us apart. To be honest, half the things, which happened in Damon's house were a blur. I managed to partially escape their wicked pranks and games. I ran upstairs to find Damon, as his friends had quickly turned into immature jokers.
Damon's old house was a little creepy with a long dark hallway, and many doors, so I waited outside the noisy shower room for Damon to reappear. I was not sure, if I liked the prospect of walking home on my own, but I had to get away from the funny, rude people in the pop out eye-ball glasses. I had absorbed too many insults in this strange house already, so I decided to leave and go home. I felt pulled about and bullied by Damon's group of quizzical friends. Just as I was about to disappear down the long slope towards my house, Damon came rushing up behind me. Damon had changed his cloths, but still looked half dressed, so I sent him back to change again. After changing twice, he still managed to look silly, so I gave up on him putting on something I liked. I thought I had lost the battle for Damon's friendship, but one apologetic look from him, and we slid off towards my house hand in hand. I guess the styles of dress were different here. It is funny how quickly war wounds heal if opposites attract. As we walked Damon talked about the house and it's pink and silver paint work; Damon revealed he had actually balanced up a ladder to do the tall building's paintwork himself.
Well as Damon and I started to walk towards my house, which was quite a long way to go in high heels. Just as I started to tire, a little car pulled up. Damon's pals decided to offer us a lift, so I guess it was almost a truce. There was still no way his loony friends were coming into my house sporting their reckless party-time behaviour. I had already been accused of kissing Damon's father, and I did not need any more obscure wize cracks. Damon and I said goodbye to his friends, and thanked them for dropping us home. Cressida, who was quietly baby sitting, opened the door to us with her mouth open, this was not her normal composed stance. Cressida is a good, loyal friend and she was being child minder for the night. Cressida continued to stare at Damon, until I had to make excuses for her. I really did not understand why Cressida looked so shocked at my date. I think Cressida knew of the local pop scene, and Damon was already a little star in his local area. Damon and I managed to snatch a very long night of tender moments, which I will not go into detail about. Sleeping with Damon is like being loved by a huge wolf hound, so I was literally pinned down until morning. Damon is a generous guy, who always managed to give me something sweet, but so many people readily lied about the Damon and I. In the end, their destruction broke my heart in two, as I became at the mercy of their nasty lies. I always sat indoors as a single parent, and nights out were rare, so I missed out on a lot of regular fun. My current group of friends decided to manipulate me like an evil tool, which they used to hurt Damon with. I ended up like a ferried about idiot, and I was used to unwittingly rip Damon into two. In the beginning, my group even took me to a music rehearsal to potentially start a fight, and I did not even realise Damon was standing at the back of the hall on the distant stage. I was the dumb fool who got whisked along and told more disgusting lies to keep me ignorant. When in reality, Damon and I where the only ones who did not know the rules to this vicious game. It was months later, that I eventually realized Damon was a pop star. In fact, it was not until Damon starred back from the television, and only then did the penny finally drop. Damon had mentioned in conversation that he practiced in a band, but my daughter took precedence at the time. I later bought the Star-burst video and watched Damon and his band's tour. I found myself all over Damon's songs and my spoken words were embedded into the lyrics, which was a bit painful at the time. The pop scene fans can be spiteful, but enemies really mess with hearts. Why they would not let our relationship belong to just two people, I will never know. The strange games continued, even to the point of taking me all the way to the Half Moon in Putney where Damon was doing a private rehearsal. I should have been suspicious, as with no money people never invited me anywhere. My close friend Julie did not mention, or give me a tip-off that Damon would be there.
I had already been told previously by one of my old school friends Alun, that Damon was actually gay, and this was a few days after Damon had stayed over at my house, so I had already cried over that nasty bombshell. Plus, I had some items stolen from my house, a gold sovereign and a unique fossil, which was given to me by my father. The theft was blamed on Damon by Alun. I did go to Damon's house to look for the fossil and apparently Alun had actually given The fossil to Damon. I felt too out numbered to argue, so I said, "You can keep the fossil Damon." I wanted the fossil back really, but it was like too rival gangs and Damon's house became a war zone. Plus, I had already punched one of Damon's friends on the nose for spoiling a private song, which Damon had started to sing to me in his back garden. So to diffuse the situation I left without my fossil; I had to make a hasty retreat after apologising to Alex, as he moaned clutching his nose. Most of the information about Damon's sexuality had come from Alun a brown-eyed blonde gay guy. I later fell for many more spiteful tricks, which were thrown on to my path by Alun. I ended my friendship with Alun in 1989. I can still hear Alun's words.
Alun said, "Damon wants nothing to do with you as a person, as he is seeing me now. Damon is gay and you just don't get it!" I do not think Alun knew, I had just made love to Damon, as it was a secret, but I was truly gutted. I think back to how tragic the whole event was to me. I remember, I fell to my knees and felt insane with the loss at the time. I ended up in hospital, as I self harmed my wrists. It was supposed to be a romantic partnership, and I felt totally used and undone. The only way to keep my sanity was to erase all memory of Damon, and that is what I did, as I lay in the hospital bed all bandaged up. Damon had become a homosexual to me after Alun's spiteful words, and I wanted to totally forget all about him. I told myself Damon had just used me, and I cried. With my deep hidden sadness buried, I did not foresee that the evil group would continue to try and use me as a tool to wind Damon up further, and even people I thought were close friends, stitched me up left, right, and centre.
It was vegetarian, hippy, Julie who asked me to go to the Half Moon with her. Julie sublimely covered the truth by saying, "A T-rex copy gig are playing, so I must go!" I knew T-rex were Julie's favorite band. The copy gig were playing at the Half Moon, but there was no mention from her that Damon would be there also, which is sublime deceit. On arriving at the gig, a large group of fans all turned and seemed to envelope me and love me for a second or two, it was a strange feeling of fame, which I did not think belonged to me. A wave of noise and lively chatter suddenly arrived and it seemed to be all about me. One person asked, "Hello, are you still seeing the lead singer." I really did not have a clue who they spoke of, and an argument started, as I tried to figure out just what the large crowd were on about as they all stared in my direction. I replied, "No." which seemed to disgust the crowd. The Damon I loved, and a lead singer of a band did not gel in my mind, as the same person. I thought Damon dumped our relationship ages ago, and I had sulked indoors for months and saw no-one.
Julie pulled me away from the crowd and pushed me in to a quiet entrance where the band would later sing. There were only a few people inside, which I later found out to be the band members of the Blur. Damon and his band were inside already and admittedly, I did liked Damon all over again when I saw him at the Half Moon, but did not recognize him as my Damon. This new guy had a confusingly different look with long hair pulled into a ponytail, and it was very dark inside. Damon is my type of guy what ever look he is wearing because I like blue eyes and nice cheekbones.
So unaware it was my Damon I spoke briefly, and flirted with him all over again. I think I mentioned to Damon, I had come for the other gig, which must of hurt, but it was not intentional. Julie had specified to wear something suitable for the T-rex gig. I even remember pointing Damon out when we first arrived, as a lovely looking fella, and I said, "Cor! Look Julie, long hair and black string vest, isn't he gorgeous." Why do people talk so much behind a person's back, but nothing to their actual face? I will never understand why all this cruelty went on. I felt excluded from my own life path, and so angry with the two opposing groups.
The continuous strange, destructive behavior left me with a feeling of alienation, and I no longer speak to most of these people. The crowd of fans did not come into the rehearsal at The Half Moon, which at the time I did not understand, and I stood solo and watch Damon sing. Damon became so angry with me at one point he threw a booted kick towards my face whilst singing on stage, which just missed my face. I could not get over the lead singer's sudden violent reaction. A lead singer of a band, had just tried to kick me in the face, and I was politely clapping at the time too. So what had I done? I still did not recognise the Damon on stage with long hair, and the changed style, as my Damon! I thought the lovely lead singer of this new band, which I had just met, suddenly hated me. I still did not realize this angry man as my Damon, the same bloke who apparently dumped me to be homosexual with Alun a few months back? Damon ran out of the building, and after a few minutes, I felt my heart sink, as I tried to fathom out this man's sad angry out burst. I briefly left the building to look for the singer, but I was too late. I shouted out into the night after him, but I was not sure what I would say, if I caught up with him. It is obvious now, Damon also had a plate of lies to eat about me, people are so cruel! What did Damon and I have, that needed taring apart so badly? I never thought people would go that far to destroy two people, but they did. Even now, I would like to ask them why?
Our relationship might have survived as Damon and I bonded, but our two groups lied to keep us apart. Both group's tactics got decidedly unsavory. Damon and I were the only casualties in this strange game. At least now, I have some of the lies sorted, and Damon now looks more like an innocent casualty, which makes me feel a little better about the first part of this true tale. I knew I had fallen in love with someone sweet and innocent in the beginning, but various people chose to meddle, so viciously I was left brain dead about the whole situation. Damon was a bitter pill, and our story will always be like West Side Story, but the eventual, long awaited center is sweet. My Advice would be, no matter how close you think your friends are, go and get it from the horses mouth, especially, when it is in connection with love and matters of the heart. Or like me, you could get your heart broken, and it will not be by your lover, but by jealous rivals and their lies. On a lighter note truth eventually prevails. If this item is perceived as written in a choppy manner, it is because this was my state of mind at the time, and I also have the write to with hold parts and certain information.
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