ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Favorite Quotes from Steve Martin

Updated on October 4, 2008

An apology? Bah! Disgusting! Cowardly! Beneath the dignity of any gentleman, however wrong he might be.

Boy, those French: They have a different word for everything!

Chaos in the midst of chaos isn't funny, but chaos in the midst of order is.

"Don't have sex man. It leads to kissing and pretty soon you have to start talking to them."

"A kiss may not be the truth, but it is what we wish were true"

"You know what your problem is, it's that you haven't seen enough movies - all of life's riddles are answered in the movies."

"I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy."

"I believe you should place a woman on a pedestal - high enough so you can look up her dress"

"First the doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me."

"I've got to keep breathing. It'll be my worst business mistake if I don't."

"I like a woman with a head on her shoulders. I hate necks."

"I gave my cat a bath the other day. . .they love it. He sat there, he enjoyed it, if was fun for me. The fur would stick to my tongue, but other than that. . ."

"I think I did pretty well, considering I started out with nothing but a bunch of blank paper."

"Love is a promise delivered already broken."

"Comedy is the art of making people laugh without making them puke"

"I believe entertainment can aspire to be art, and can become art, but if you set out to make art you're an idiot."

"When your hobbies get in the way of your work - that's OK; but when your hobbies get in the way of themselves... well..."

"I believe in eight of the ten commandments; and I believe in going to church every Sunday unless there's a game on"

"I believe Ronald Reagan can make this country what it once was. . . a large Arctic region covered with ice."

"It was so sweet backstage, you should have seen it: The Teamsters were helping Michael Moore into the trunk of his limo."

"There is one thing I would break up over, and that is if she caught me with another woman. I won't stand for that."

"A day without sunshine is like, you know, night."

"Talking about music is like dancing about architecture."

"Sex is one of the most wholesome, beautiful and natural experiences that money can buy."

"The real joy is in constructing a sentence. But I see myself as an actor first because writing is what you do when you are ready and acting is what you do when someone else is ready."

"Hosting the Oscars is much like making love to a woman. It's something I only get to do when Billy Crystal is out of town."

"These times are much franker. For example, in the first movie we have to assume that the daughter and the son-in-law who got married were lovers before they got married. That could never have been in the '50s."

"There are some people that will not pick up a phone and call you, but if you knock on a door and talk to them, they'll talk back to you,"

"There was a point when I was around 14,"

"There was a time in my life when I was very interested in relationship psychology. Relationships end, but they don't end your life. But people do often spending more time finding out about failed relationships than finding successful ones."

"I would have felt a little funny if another actor was playing this role."

"We are comfortable, collectively, that those 12 [shootings] are related."

"I just brush it off and try to make a joke about it. Over the years it's been interesting."

"I'm surprised even now that I was aware of things like that at that age. I don't know why. But I decided I would just rather not do them. So I quit for a while."

"a pile of near-misses."

"We are just happy that we are here in Brazil and that this was a good ending."

"[On his breakthrough 1977 album] Let's Get Small, ... There's a million people onstage and everything's moving real fast and you can't understand a word they say but it doesn't matter and you just sit there and go, 'Wow! Look at the (breasts)! I'll bet there's 57 (breasts) up there!' "

"Comedy may be big business but it isn't pretty."

"Lots of women are getting involved. They're not satisfied just being passengers anymore."

Talking about music is like dancing about architecture.

Comments

Submit a Comment

  • profile image

    ed77burns 

    7 years ago

    I felt really nice to read your quotes mentioned in this hub.Beautiful quotes!!

  • Patty Inglish, MS profile image

    Patty Inglish MS 

    10 years ago from USA. Member of Asgardia, the first space nation, since October 2016

    "Talking about music is like dancing about architecture."

    Exactly. :)

  • desert blondie profile image

    desert blondie 

    10 years ago from Palm trees, swimming pools, lots of sand, lots of sunscreen

    What a fantastic collection to share!

  • glassvisage profile image

    glassvisage 

    10 years ago from Northern California

    Such great quotes... I wanted to comment about a couple of them, but I can't choose just a few! He's so great... I just finished watching his Saturday Night Live collection. Genius :)

working

This website uses cookies

As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://hubpages.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

Show Details
Necessary
HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
Features
Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
Marketing
Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
Statistics
Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)