Here Comes Honey Boo Boo -- The Redneck Games And Etiquette Lessons

When I heard TLC was going to feature a show on one of the toddlers from Toddlers And Tiara's I had no idea what they could do about one. Just having them compete in contests? What I never expected was this show.

We get introduced to the family: Mama the matriarch and boss, Sugar Bear the patriarch, the siblings: Chick-A-Dee who appears to be an unwed mother, Chubbs [they're all kind of overweight to one extent or another so don't know why she's the only one that got pinned with this name] and Pumpkin. Of course, the star of the show is the outrageous Honey Boo Boo. I guess the one thing I can say for this show is if you find farting offensive, this probably is not the show for you, as they seem to do a lot of farting.

I actually wondered how Alana aka Honey Boo Boo came up with her nickname so I kind of took it apart. Honey means sweet and Boo-Boo usually means you've made a mistake. When you put them together you get Sweet Mistake. If that's the case and Alana was an unplanned pregnancy, it's not the nicest of nicknames. Kind of right up there with Chubbs.

Honey Boo Boo is preparing to compete in a natural child beauty pageant to see how well she does. Before that happens the family competes in the Redneck Games. One of the siblings declares that they're not rednecks because they have all their teeth, but then Mama declares she has to scratch her bugs, and the no-teeth rule doesn't seem to apply. Among the games in the Redneck Games, which Pumpkin and Alana compete in are: Bobbing For Pig's Feet and Belly-Flopping In The Mud.

While at the games, Mama won't let the kids go swimming in the swimming hole because there's a warning posted that the water might contain a flesh-eating disease. It doesn't seem to stop a lot of people who you can see out swimming in the water.

Unfortunately for Honey Boo Boo's pageant dreams she doesn't do well at the pageant. So, Sugar Bear decides to cheer her up by getting her the pet she's wanted for a while: a pot belly pig. Honey Boo Boo names it Glitzy in honor of the Glitz Pageants. She seems to hope to find a way to work out a routine with Glitzy to do in the pageants she competes in.

All the women have a weigh-in to see how much they weigh and Mama tops them all with a whopping 309 pounds. They decide to go on a diet. They talk about a diet I don't think most have hear of. The Farting Diet. They claim if you can fart a lot a day you can lose weight. However, when they go to an auction where they can also buy cheap food [every little bit they save goes for Honey Boo Boo's pageants] Mama buys a lot of junk food, which won't work with the diet.

Mama also decides to get Honey Boo Boo some etiquette lessons to try and improve her chances in the pageants. Pumpkin also gets a lesson, as well. Things don't go so well when Pumpkin declares she can fart sitting down. The teacher leaves and I don't get the feeling the girls are anymore well-mannered then when she came.

The family also goes with Chick-A-Dee when she goes for her ultrasound. Mama says she never wanted this for Chick-A-Dee. That she also got pregnant young. But she's proud that Chick-A-Dee is still going to school intent on getting her education.

This truly is Train Wreck TV. You just sit there watching it with an almost sick fascination. You know you should look away. You want to look away. But somehow you have to keep watching. I suppose in the loosest sense of the word this could be considered an educational program. You're learning about a new way of life. I personally never imagined someone would pick up roadkill off the road and use it for food or there was such a thing as a Farting Diet. Now I know better.