"Jurassic World" 2015 Movie Review

Movie: Jurassic World

Directed by: Colin Trevorrow

Screenplay by: Derek Connolly, Colin Trevorrow, Rick Jaffa, Amanda Silver

Based on: Characters by Michael Crichton

Cast: Chris Pratt, Bryce Dallas Howard, Ty Simpkins

Genre: action, adventure, scifi, thriller

Release date: June 12, 2015

My Rating: 8/10

IMDB: 7/10

Summary (w/spoilers) on Wiki

Verdict: Fun addition to the Jurassic series

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Review (spoiler free):

I have watched the first Jurassic Park movie more times than I can remember. So when I heard they were making a new one, well...I was really excited.

And hey, with a hilarious "Lord" at the helm, then yeah...I knew I was going to like it before I even saw the trailer.

Granted, it had issues....moments where I was yelling "Don't do it!!"....but that's such a Jurassic park trope that I wasn't even too mad about it. The whole experience is in watching people who think they have the world and dinosaurs figured out, and controlled, and we find out that that isn't really the case...and that nature can't be controlled. That's one of the biggest themes of this series, actually.

I guess it's a philosophy. And the stance is that nature cannot be controlled no matter how much we try to control it. I saw this in every JP movie, so I don't think it's all in my head.

Ok one thing to mention: It had a lot of plot holes and main characters doing really stupid things to further the plot...but it was still so fun that I was able to put those angry/annoyed feelings aside to enjoy the film.

Though you can bet that I'm going to complain about all those problems in the spoilery section.

Plot:

We follow Chris Pratt (Owen) and Bryce Dallas Howard (Claire) (ex lovers), who happen to both work for Jurassic World. Claire's nieces come to Jurassic world, and that's the same day that very stupid people do very stupid things to somehow get the new bad dino to escape and terrorize the whole park full of people. Lots of people die, minus our main characters (duh), and we even get a dash of romance thrown in within all the chaos of dead people. But no fear....the bad dino is under control.

*ignores all other dinosaurs loose in the park* >.>

Honestly...if the park opens again after all people that died there..I'm going to be very surprised. But there's going to be a 5th movie...so something's going to happen.

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Conclusion:

I know my quick review sounded negative, and it's about to get worse..but I promise you, even though I destroy this movie..I ENJOYED IT...A LOT.

In fact...a lot of times, I will complain like crazy ( most of my complaining stem from stupid characters doing stupid things), but I will still give the movie a decent score.

If you liked the first JP movie, this movie is really a homage to the first film. Some parts were almost mimicking the first film...which didn't feel insulting...it just felt nostalgic (for me anyways).

If you're somewhere in the middle and don't know if you should watch, I'd go with watching it rather than not. You might love it.

Note:

Howard was the vampire Victoria in The Twilight Saga: Eclipse (2010)

Pratt was the main lead in the Passengers movie (Review here)

The guy gives a rather pathetic reason for wanting to create a new dinosaur. They say that the old dinosaurs are becoming uninteresting for the viewers, and that they need something new and spookier to get more people to come visit their park.

I don't believe you!!! Zoos have been around a long time...and us puny humans still go there on weekends. All the time! You think anyone would tire of Dinos???? I don't believe you!!!!! I mean...how long has this park been open? A few years? A decade? It can't be more than that. There is just no way people would get bored.

I'm not buying their reason. I think they just wanted to mess with genetic mutation and came up with this new dinosaur and thought "hey, might as well throw it in the park and see what happens". Because they're stupid...for ignoring all signs to just put that dino down like a sane person.

Sigh....I just expect too much from scientists in movies. They're all dumb.

Okay, I'm just going to go through the whole movie and point out every stupid thing that I can think of. I'll start with the minor ones and get to the good ones near the end.

I usually like kids in movies. They bring an interesting dynamic into a movie.

Unless they're stupid stupid stupid.

Which, in this case, they were.

The first mistake they make is when they are all called back because there are problems" in the park...and the older brother decides "who cares, let's get out of our route, and go somewhere else and explore...because it's a great idea!"

Yeah...it's not.

I feel sorry for the kid, it's not even his fault.....but they really had it coming.

You just don't do that man. Not in this park.

He's a velociraptor trainer...and they wanna eat him occasionally. Sometimes they snack on other workers when the workers are really stupid.

I wonder what kind of paperwork you need to sign to work here. Does one include "Park not liable if you get eaten by the creatures you feed"?

But aside from that...how does one guy in the military think it's a good idea to release these animals and have Owen lead them to fight a bigger dinosaur??? Did he just not see Owen almost becoming velociraptor food? Is the guy blind to reality? "Bond" my ass....they're staying in their cages.

I mean...nobody listens to me...so you know,.....some people become velociraptor food later on.

Also..while I thought it was sorta cool how Owen and Blue(velociraptor) had a bond of sorts...I had a hard time believing in loyalties switching for Blue between Owen and it's hunger/other dinos.

Really....in reality it would either stick with Owen till the end, or just choose it's own side. I'd go with it's own side being more of the reality.

But we wouldn't have more stupidity and deaths if that were the case....so let's do it!

When i saw this part of the movie...I just thought of this scene from The Mask film:

Yeah..funny way my brain connects things...but when you see something you came for..you don't wait for it..you shoot it!

Also..why dont their weapons work? Like...why isn't it tested to be effective in case of emergencies? A lot of unnecessary blood is shed because of this.

Incompetent workers everywhere!!!!!

This was probably the first dumbest scene in the movie. It was so stupid..I was wondering if I'd entered the twilight zone or something. Not in terms of how weird or freaky it was...but how bizarre Clair'e reaction was. It. Was. Stupid.

It was dumber than the scientists in Alien: Covenant. And that's saying something.

It goes something like this:

"On nooooo, the big bad dinosaur has escaped!"

"Oh noooo." *Claire gets in car and makes a phone call to track dino*

Me: uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

*people - including Owen (because these people are beyond stupid at this point-probably an IQ of negative 90 (I'm going to assume it's possible for the sake of this argument)) get inside the cage to check out where the insanely powerful and smart and sneaky and meatatarian dinosaur is.*

Me: uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh + grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

*Claire finds out - after people track the dino - that it's still inside the cage*

*Cue the dino showing itself after hiding for a long time while the people were checking out the scratch marks it left on the wall.

*Cue dino chasing idiots.

*Cue people opening the giant gate to escape

Me: uhhhh + grrr + "why are they opening the giant door? It can escape now!!!!! Why don't they have a human sized door????"

*Cue dino escaping + tasting yummy human flesh.

Me: *bored* + "you got what you had coming"

yeah...this whole scene was right out of a.....a.....I don't have a word for it because it's so stupid.

Other people had pointed out that this cage should have included a moat around the dino (think of lions in zoo)..and while I didn't think of it, they have a point. If we take these kinds of precautions with our teeny tiny less harmful animals..you think we would risk it with dinosaurs? I don't think so!

Nuff said. Next!

This is one of the parts that really annoyed me..because majority of people died from this.

A bunch of dinosaurs (pteranodon) end up getting loose from their caged place and start attacking people. It's a terrible way to die....and nothing stops them.

I was really annoyed because early in the movie they say that they have chips inside the dinosaurs that can shock them. WHY DIDN'T THEY USE IT?????

I really can't say more than this..because it's beyond stupid at this point.

So Claire gets this brilliant idea to release the T-Rex to fight the abomination dino.

I'm not entirely sure how this really helps...considering the first movie had the T-Rex as the antagonist of the movie...but hey..the fight scene was sick......and also, what's a JP movie without a T-Rex!

Ha.

Conclusion:

The movie ends on this "yay, everything is solved" note...but we all know a bunch of dinosaurs are still on the loose, people are still dying....and you know..the T-Rex is loose too....and it's probably hungry.

I have to say..I must really love JP movies, because despite all the issues I complained about, I still thoroughly enjoyed the movie (I watched it twice!).

I think the next film is going to deal with the repercussions of this film. It should be interesting.

If I had to rate the series, I think it would go something like this:

1, 4, 2, 3 or 1, 2, 4, 3

Bottom line:

The film was still pretty fun despite it's maaaany flaws. If you like dinosaurs, there is no reason not to see this one.

Thanks!