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Lifeforce, a Film That Will Literally Suck the Life Out of You

Updated on February 28, 2012

Cryogenic Chambers Instead of Coffins

The Queen Vampire
The Queen Vampire

If You Want Your Bones to Hurt, Watch This

Whether this was intended to be high schlock or accidental schlock is uncertain. This is from the director of "Poltergeist" believe it or not." It apparently was a British production, and you know how the British handle science fiction.

The basic premise wasn't terrible, but the application was incredibly awful. The initial idea: A space crew discovers a huge spaceship within the trail of Haley's comet. They investigate and find four human forms -- three male, one female. The human forms appear to be in a state of hibernation. They are brought aboard to bring back to earth.

The men onboard find themselves having psychic melt-downs because of the female form. The captain of the crew finds himself impossibly drawn toward the female and tries to destroy the craft by creating a fire then jettisons himself to earth. The interior of the spaceship is indeed ruined (I think there are no surviving crew mates before this point), but the four aliens survive within their force-field capsules.

Another space team is sent up to rendezvous with the the first derelict space craft, which discovers the aliens and transports them home. All four of the aliens are completely human in appearance. The female is (of course) gorgeous... faintly reminiscent of a young Kate Bekinsale ... who is completely nude from head to toe. Even upon her arrival on earth, she remains unclothed. Of course, things start to go completely out of control once the female (the leader of the group) is in the observation/examination room. She awakens upon being touched by one technician who (like everyone else) is drawn toward her. The female somehow is able to draw his life essence completely out of his body and re-charge herself.

Without effort, she then walks out of the facility (still completely naked) into the darkness. Naturally, there are no competent guards or safeguards. Compare this to "The Andromeda Strain" and you will think -- what a ridiculous joke. And you'd be right.

After some time you find out that these aliens are "vampires," although the term really has little bearing. They are the same "vampires" who have visited the earth in the past and created havoc. But, there is one major difference. These "vampires" do not attempt to suck blood out of people, they suck their "life source" out of them, and they can do this remotely, leaving behind zombie-like creatures that have two hours to rejuvenate themselves or explode (this part gets very sloppy toward the end -- where you just have a bunch of zombies roaming around but NOT exploding).

The film was made in the 80's so I overlooked the so-so special effects (although not all of them were bad in the beginning). The extended nudity of the lead vampire (also in the beginning) also seemed like it MIGHT be groundbreaking -- besides holding a prurient interest. The writers throw everything they can think of into the muddled plot. The chaotic/absurd nature of the "script" would cause most to turn this abomination off rather early, as it's quite clear nothing is going to get any better, and it doesn't. Back in the day when one browsed video tapes, I picked up and put down this film six or seven times.

I can only recommend it to a very few with an interest in "B" movies (on steroids) who don't mind an overwrought 80s slant. This is not a low-budget film, and it's simply amazing it ever got a green light. The film is over-long, and sitting through the whole thing takes either a lot of stamina or a masochistic streak.

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