New Apple iBoob Breast Implant Set To Explode!
Random Ramblings From Idlewild
Although I no longer practice, I am a licensed Private Investigator. During my years of investigating various nefarious characters throughout the U.S., I developed quite a network of cutthroats, thieves, informants, spies, and law enforcement officials looking to pass on some information for a couple of Ben Franklins. It was one of these spies that brought me the goods on Apple and their amazing new product.
Garage Where 1st Apple Computer Was Created
Not since Steve Wozniak and Steve Jobs built the first Apple computer with nothing but some wood, brass buttons, a few long strands of Woz's mother's hair, and some beetle dung, has Apple made such huge strides in the electronics industry - like the giant in the land of Lilliputians. First was the Apple and Macintosh computers. More recently, the iBook, the Powerbook g4, iPod and iTunes, which revolutionized the way we acquire and listen to music. Then came the long, 3-day lines of a hungry populace who had to be among the first to get the iPhone - which has built in GPS, a bomb diffuser, a tazer, and a direct connection to the space shuttle. It can do everything except make phone calls. But this, my friends, would crush them all. I say would, because Apple got cold feet and got kicked out of bed by some unknown, unruly mistress. Therefore, I wanted proof. Proof positive, and that's where my underground network comes in. My worm inside Apple uncovered this top secret, ultra-classified document. Because I believe in freely sharing information, the people's right to know, and apple pie, I share this document with you now. I encourage you to forward it to news agencies throughout the world. The people must know.