The Loneliest People in Theatres

Writer’s note: Have to be honest. In this hub, I used a brand-name, MayTag, you remember those TV commercials with a man (the serviceman), who was not happy with his work. I did not mean any endorsement or suggestion that I was pushing you to purchase (this) brand-name just because that I used in my editorial usage. Thanks, Kenneth.

was probably the loneliest guy in Alabama (at the time) who had to work at the particular security guard company in order to help my wife put food on our table, but this hub will show that I was wrong. All wrong. First-hand experience is to me, the best teacher when “we” are in doubt about something being right or wrong. Well at least I did get to work about three months of that security work guard and I was the better for it.

After those days I have thought on and off, about “that” question: who is the loneliest man or woman in the world (by my estimation)? Here are a few examples: Spiritual books sold by one man door-to-door, Military Recruitment Stands where one soldier is in this stand, such as an apple stand without apples, stands hour-after-hour and tells the interested men or women how good the U.S. Army is and how good it would be for them to sign-off and put in six-years of their life and the hub about Traffic Cops that preceded this one. And still, I found myself knowing that I was still wrong. So I kept searching.

Then there it was on that fateful night before last. And was I happy! I had stumbled upon an idea of Who Was The Loneliest People in Films? The answer WILL open your eyes. So now, I am going to start talking to you about whom I am showing you whom I am talking about.

Have You Ever Considered The

woman or man who for some reason, is always standing (or sitting) in the dangerously-Claustrophobic ticket booth with glass surrounding the person who is selling tickets. Not a tough gig by any means, but I would wager that this gig is also boring to the bones. The person who was hired to do this job would have to fit into the following description . . .

• Not have a working high-school or college degree

• Be able to give customers change when they hand them the big bills

• Occasionally smile to the customers to prove that they are appreciated

• Wear clean clothes to work

• And shoes

• Have a working-knowledge of the Iraq Language if the theater company sends him or her as the company rep and possibly train the few interested Iraqi’s on the fine art of being a ticker booth technical adviser

The Ticket Booth Cannot

• Use vulgar language at anytime, because this might run good customers away

• Wear clean clothing and keeping shirts and pants buttoned and zipped for this employee must not be responsible to causing a worship law to be broken by the ticket booth manager and any Iraqi citizen who wants to buy a ticket for the new film, “Top Gun.”

• This employee is not to flirt with any Iraqi woman or man as the booth company can be shut-down by the U.S. State Dept. and the booth employee fired and sent back to run a theater booth somewhere in Zion, Ill.

It's No Wonder That

booth managers do not keep their jobs for certain lengths of time. It is still a mystery because even the ticket booth factory and advisers cannot pin-point the problem why there is such a turn-over in the ticket booth industry.

Things that could be going against ticket booth employees:

• Depression—just the idea of sitting or standing for a day or most of the night in a hot or cold ticket booth and when the customers go into the theater . . .the excitement of seeing the customers is over. Now it’s two or three hours between new customers and “One Timers.”

• Rodents such as rats are now beginning to be a problem for ticket booth employees. The rodents are small enough to eat through the flimsy outside walls of the booth and sneak into the booth to get any corn or potato chips the employee might have dropped on the floor and if there is any money dropped to the floor, the wiser rodents can make a great living picking-up change.

• Weather problems such as heavy rains or snowfalls can help make ticket both workers to call it a day between films. There is no heat or air conditioners in ticket booths because the booths companies are too cheap to make them “Employee Friendly.”

The Number One Reason

why ticket booth employees do not work a long time is . . .there is NO Restroom Facilities inside a ticker booth. Employees must learn how to “hold it,” even when a ticket customer is standing into the booth manager’s face asking stupid questions about the film being will the customer be charged for the film going past 120 minutes as advertised on the movie poster? Or this one: will the ticket customer be allowed to sit on his/or her back-end in the aisle as a respect of their “Worship of People’s Shoes?”

Any ticket booth employee who just lets Nature do the calling before he/she can get to a rest room, is commended for not causing health problems . . .and the urine does a great job of killing the rodents that are beginning to live in the floor area of the booth.

April 12, 2020____________________________________________________