Things I've Noticed 3: Kid's Cartoons Are TERRIBLE for Kids Now.

Seriously, folks, I love me some Family Guy, Robot Chicken, American Dad, and Super Jail as much as the next chick....but I wouldn't let my 7 year old watch it, now would I? Don't get me wrong, I'm not one of your average TV Nazis, censoring the universe. Hey, I watch (and laugh outrageously) at all the crappy shows, too. I'm just saying that if you have small kids, they really shouldn't be watching this crap. I mean really, Ren & Stimpy and Beevis & Butthead were on at midnight FOR A REASON...so kids couldn't watch it. (We did anyhow, but it wasn't with our parents permission that's for sure!)

Now these types of shows are played all day, on kids channels and major networks, all the time. Now, I ask again, am I going to be letting a 7 year old watch these shows? Of course not! I'd say these shows shouldn't be watched by any child under 9, or 11 if they are running low on common sense.

And why, you ask? Because it is my job, as a parent, to teach my children good things, like hurting people is wrong, and stealing is wrong, talking back to your elders is wrong, running around acting like an idiot is wrong, etc...obviously Family Guy is an adult cartoon. That isn't even a debate. What this blog is about is the sneaky ones that disguise themselves as kid shows, while really just teaching them to misbehave.

Here's a few examples:

TELETUBBIES

Have you ever actually sat down and watched this damn show with your kids? OF COURSE NOT! It sucks. But one day, I did. You know what I saw? The little freaks were running all over the damn place, making huge messes and breaking stuff. Okay, kids do that. What's the moral, you inquire?

THERE WASN'T ONE.

The entire show was centered around this machine, called the "NuNu", running around after them cleaning up. They never stopped the whole time, and never apologized. They never got in trouble, nothing bad happened, they just got away with it. I WAS SO MAD. The whole show was just a bunch of fluff and colors for small children to stare at blankly and never learn a damn thing. Yet more pandering to the masses. No child that I am rearing will ever watch that crap-fest again.

Spongebob Squarepants

Guys. Here's a small tip. IF YOU ARE ENJOYING/LAUGHING YOUR BUTT OFF AT YOUR KIDS CARTOON, it probably isn't quality TV.

I don't know about you, but MY kid is nobodies fool. HE GETS THE DIRTY JOKES AND INNUENDOS. Has since he was about 5. If he can do it, so can your kid! I found this out through trial and error. He is allowed to watch shows on this list NOW, but back then I freaked out. OH NO!!! I'M RUINING MY CHILD!!! AHHH!

Yeah he was my first kid haha

But anyhow, totally inappropriate for a "children's" cartoon to have that kind of stuff, and for ANY TV program to assume the jokes and stuff will go over kid's heads, just to try to draw in a larger audience.

Another pointer: If your small boy asks you why Spongebob is allowed behind a wheel of a "boat", and when you tell him it's just school, he's learning, your boy says "I don't know...he's dangerous. They should kick him out."...you know he's old enough to watch.

(Spongebob really is funny though. Don't tell the kids.)

iCarly

Once again, if your child's show makes you laugh, then the phrase of the day is "PARENTING: YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG".

Ok, this show has a bunch of kids with no adult supervision running amok, airing a live webcam show, and basically wreaking havoc. The girl Sam is super violent, always hitting people for no reason, and never has consequences. AND IN THE SHOW SHE'S CONSIDERED THE COOL ONE. Rewarding bullying. GOOD JOB NICKELODEON.

The Fairly Odd Parents

Oh, little Timmy....you have so many issues. Your parents ignore you and leave you home alone for hours at the age of 11, and when they are home, you are allowed to wander the streets alone and unwatched for entire days, your "fairy godparents" are complete idiots, your babysitter is abusive and neglectful, your teacher stalks and plots against you....and NOBODY EVER PICKS UP ON ANY OF THIS.

A good ending to this show would be Timmy getting taken away by DSS and the parents and Vicky, the sitter, and the teacher all going to JAIL.

Calliou

This is one of the worse shows for small children I have ever seen. Calliou spends his whole day talking like a baby and whining, throwing tantrums, etc...pretty much being the worst part of toddlerdom all episode long, and his parents just let it happen. They don't correct his poor attitude and spoiled behavior in any way, they either give in or just say oh well and move on. This show gets a D-.

Really guys...

Now, those are just a few, I'm sure we all know there are TONS more. But c'mon, what happened to awesome shows with daily morals like G.I. Joe, Thundercats, Power Rangers, Ninja Turtles, My lil Pony, Smurfs, and Transformers? I mean, they didn't have to go all 'Leave it to Beaver' to teach kids things, did they? They still had values while being completely awesome.

Maybe I'm biased, as I hate TV nowadays in general, but seriously folks...kids shows these days are too grown-up.