Weekly 10 Best Movie Quotes #4

This is a weekly posting of ten movie quotes that have made a lasting, memorable impression with audiences. In no particular order, here is this week’s best movie quotes. There are links to earlier and later installments at the bottom.

Remember to vote for your favorite quote at the bottom!!!

Also, If you have a quote that you’d like to see make the list, make a request in the comments section or let me know through a message. If it’s worthy, it will show up in a future post.

“Dr. Grant, my dear Dr. Sattler. Welcome to Jurassic Park.”

When Steven Spielberg’s masterpiece first graced the big screen, this quote became synonymous with that breathtaking moment when audiences first laid their eyes on the life-like, computer generated, prehistoric reptiles. John Hammond, whose the man responsible for reintroducing the extinct animals back into the living world, utters these words to the two paleontologists as they all marvel at a Brachiosaurus that is grazing on an enormous tree. As with Spielberg’s Jaws, this is before the transition takes place. The first half of the film introduces the characters and allows the audience to marvel at a few different species of dinosaurs before shifting into pure survival mode, as the characters try to figure out a way off the island. After the power fails, the dinosaurs gain free reign of the island, which includes the deadly carnivores and the survivors ban together to try to reestablish control and make a call for help. However, this line is stated during that peaceful time when Jurassic Park was still a one of a kind, up in coming, tourist’s dream and before it became a complete hellish nightmare.

“You know how when you grab a woman's breast. It feels like... a bag of sand.”

What started as a simple poker game with the guys quickly turned into a discussion on sex, which 40-year-old virgin Andy Sitzer had little experience with. The entire scene is nothing short of being completely hilarious, but this line brings the discussion to a head, as the guys quickly discern that Andy still has yet to seal the deal with a lady. This is the start of the group attempting various techniques and strategies to get the man some action, which will leave viewers rolling with laughter. It’s Steve Carell at his best, along with the all-star cast that accompanies him (including Seth Rogan).

“The truth is... I am Iron Man.”

Robert Downey Jr. seems perfectly cast for genius, billionaire, playboy Tony Stark and delivers various memorable lines throughout the superhero flick. However, this one tends to stick out, as it is not the norm. Although not hard to believe that his character is incapable of such cockiness or blunt honesty, but the concept certainly is abnormal for a superhero movie. Most heroes exhaust a good deal of effort keeping their duel lives from intermixing and their true identities secret. However, Tony Stark says the hell with all of that and admits to being the ironclad savior of the Marvel Universe during a live press conference at the film’s conclusion. The revealing is a perfect reflection of the character's confident, lovable attitude that grows on me more with every watch.

“What’s in the box?”

Poor Detective Mills already has an idea of what horrible surprises the box holds after John Doe (Kevin Spacey) delivers one of his psychopathic, delusional, self-righteous rants. I won’t ruin the ending of this excellent paced thriller, but if you haven’t seen it, damn is this scene intense the first time through. As John Doe attempts to complete his sick “work” (series of killings based on the seven deadly sins), Mills partner, Lt. William Somerset (Morgan Freeman) tries to defuse the situation and prevent the madman from achieving his goals. This final confrontation and quote always come to mind when I think of this movie and for good reason.

“This is the day you will always remember as the day you almost caught Captain Jack Sparrow!”

The stumbling, slightly crazed, pirate boasts this statement more than once, starting from the beginning of the film, but is never taken seriously. However, it is only throughout the course of the movie that we learn that Jack actually was a captain and was overthrown by his traitorous crew of mutineers. Johnny Depp’s performance as Captain Jack Sparrow is delivered with perfection and, while he spouts out numerous memorable lines, this one certainly stands out as one of the funniest.

Janice (Stephanie Nevin): “I've got the perfect girl for you!”

Jeremy Grey (Vince Vaughn): “Janice, I apologize to you if I don't seem real eager to jump into a forced awkward intimate situation that people like to call dating. I don't like the feeling. You're sitting there, you're wondering do I have food on my face, am I eating, am I talking too much, are they talking enough, am I interested I'm not really interested, should I play like I'm interested but I'm not that interested but I think she might be interested but do I want to be interested but now she's not interested? So all of the sudden I'm getting, I'm starting to get interested... And when am I supposed to kiss her? Do I have to wait for the door cause then it's awkward, it's like well goodnight. Do you do like that ass-out hug? Where you like, you hug each other like this and your ass sticks out cause you're trying not to get too close or do you just go right in and kiss them on the lips or don't kiss them at all? It's very difficult trying to read the situation. And all the while you're just really wondering are we gonna get hopped up enough to make some bad decisions? Perhaps play a little game called "just the tip". Just for a second, just to see how it feels. Or, ouch, ouch you're on my hair.”

The wedding crasher is brutally honest in this scene, as he is throughout the entire film. Speaking rapidly in a surprisingly understandable pace, Vince Vaughn delivers this speech fluently without missing a beat. As with many of my chosen quotes, there are a plethora of great ones in Wedding Crashers, but this one is certainly unforgettable and memorable. Not only is this speech hilarious, but also speaks a certain truth about dating in general and is probably why this moment is not easily displaced.

“I take away his weapons. Both of them”

Considering the sick, psychopath that Hartigan (Bruce Willis) is describing during his narration is a child rapist; it’s not hard to figure out what the man’s other weapon was besides his hand cannon. In a brutal display, Hartigan attempts to prevent Roark Jr. (Nick Stahl) from victimizing anymore young girls, but finds out later that he was uncussesful. However, this line is narrated once again when Hartigan disables a rebuilt Jr., who he nicknames the yellow bastard. What can be said, the quote is perfect because it’s brief, but purveys the blunt, brutal approach of the seasoned cop.

Mufasa’s Ghost: “You have forgotten who you are and so have forgotten me. Look inside yourself, Simba. You are more than what you have become. You must take your place in the Circle of Life.”

Simba: “How can I go back? I'm not who I used to be.”

Mufasa’s Ghost: “Remember who you are. You are my son, and the one true king. Remember...”

While his death was the reason for Simba’s (voiced by Matthew Broderick) initial exile and doubt in himself, Mufasa’s cloudy apparition bestows a new sense of hope in the banished king. Even where Nala (voiced by Moira Kelly), who becomes the lion’s love interest, failed to convince him, it was the ghost of his father that came through as the voice of reason and convinced Simba to return to the pride lands and retake his kingdom. Following Mufasa’s words, Simba goes back to Pride Rock, where he dethrones his cynical uncle, Scar (voiced by Jeremy Irons).

“Come with me if you want to live.”

Kyle Reese’s offer of life to Sarah Connor (Linda Hamilton) would become a reoccurring phrase throughout the entire franchise. As the futuristic assassin moves in on his prey (Connor) in a nightclub, Sergeant Reese intercepts the cyborg and temporarily immobilizes the killing machine before uttering the legendary line. Sarah Connor would once again be given a similar offer by the T-800 (Arnold Schwarzenegger) in Terminator 2: Judgment Day in an eerily familiar rescue from a termination attempt. This would be used once again in Terminator Salvation and in the pilot episode of Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles. However, it still seems to be the most effective in the first two films, especially the original.

“I said it looked like a battleship, not that it was a battleship.” _{For Graw}

If you’ve read my review on The Wicker Man or have actually sat down and endured that mess for yourself, then you know that the movie is one that’s so bad it’s good. However, here is one that could certainly give Nicholas Cage’s shenanigans a run for its money. Although we should note that this came out way before The Wicker Man remake and was a monster B movie, wow does this film ever raise the absurdity meter to a whole new level. The unfortunate actors take the film so serious and, from what I understand, had no idea what the monster was going to look like as it was inserted in later. This makes sense since they wouldn’t be able to pull of such believable performances, without busting out laughing if they only knew the bird’s true appearance. Take a look at the picture below to see how ridiculous the giant claw actually is and give it a watch to truly see some really descent acting that is completely ruined by the ludicrousness of the monstrous bird. But damn, I haven’t even started in on the awesomeness of this quote.

For the few of you reading this who have actually ventured a watch at this “classic,” you know that this quote quickly becomes a catch phrase throughout the movie. Everyone, including government officials, begin referring to the creature as “a flying battleship” or “as big as a battleship” and not on just one occasion. Why they chose a battleship over, well anything that flies is beyond me. But going with something that traverses water, as opposed to the sky, makes about as much sense as the bird’s appearance, bizarre flight pattern, antimatter shielding, and extraterrestrial origin. If you have some free time and are willing to let all common sense and expectations go, I say give it a watch.