ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

What you can do with that dreaded fruitcake

Updated on May 29, 2014

Four ways to get rid of that awful fruitcake

I'm sure everyone at some point in their lives has been given a fruitcake. Maybe it's from a well-intentioned friend, or maybe it's from a not-so-good friend who's trying to send you a message (Go away or I'll keep giving you fruitcake!). However you got it, now's the time to get rid of it. And here are some fun ways to do it.

The fruitcake mop

The fruitcake mop
The fruitcake mop

Do you like fruitcake?

See results

Recycle it




I know you've heard of re-gifting. Everybody does it. And fruitcake is the perfect re-gift gift. Just repackage it and give it to someone else (preferably someone you don't like too much because you certainly wouldn't want a good friend to think you hate them).

A cheap way to spruce it up before regifting it is to get a clear gift basket bag from the dollar store. Just stick the fruitcake in it and fancy it up with a ribbon or bow.

Threaten the kids

Kids won't pick up their toys? Threaten them with fruitcake for snack. You'll have a clean house in no time. Kids won't eat supper? Start slicing off a big chunk of fruitcake. Their plates will be clean in record time. Any time they misbehave just pull out the old fruitcake. You'll have the best behaved kids in the neighborhood.

Use it for target practice

Have you ever watched CSI where they shoot bullets into that gel stuff? It always stops about halfway through. I think fruitcake would have the same effect.

Toss it!

No. I don't mean throw it away. I mean, literally, toss it. Every year in January, the folks in Manitou Springs, Colorado hold a fruitcake tossing competition. But don't think that just because they are tossing cakes, it's not a serious competition. Judges take the event seriously and make contestants adhere to standards such as weight divisions (two and four pound fruitcakes), launching distances, fruitcake contents (must contain glacéed fruits, nuts, flour and be edible) and launching devices (non-fuel devices only). Participants win trophies for:

  • Catch the Fruitcake - Team members catch fruitcakes launched from their team's device.
  • Accuracy with Targets - Targets are placed at distances of 75 feet, 125 feet and 175 feet with the objective to land or hit a target.
  • Most Creative Launch/Crowd Pleaser - Teams are tasked to execute an inventive launch as judged by the crowd.
  • Best Showmanship - Peoples Choice Award - Teams are judged by costume, decorated devices and slogans.

This sounds like a great way to get rid of that dreaded fruitcake!

If you actually like fruitcake....

You could try to break the fruitcake eating record. All you'd have to do is eat more than 4 pounds and 14 ounces of fruitcake in ten minutes.

Did you know.....

Only 28% of people actually eat the fruitcake they're given?

Do you have a friend you'd like to get rid of? - Send them a fruitcake!

FRUIT CAKE Boxed 3-1lb Regular Recipe Claxton Fruitcake
FRUIT CAKE Boxed 3-1lb Regular Recipe Claxton Fruitcake

Check this out! This 3 box set will allow you to rid yourself of 3 annoying friends at once! But beware! This plan might backfire because this fruitcake has excellent reviews on Amazon.

 
Jane Parker Light Fruit Cake Ring (48oz)
Jane Parker Light Fruit Cake Ring (48oz)

You can send two messages in one with this "Lite" fruitcake.

 
Paradise Extra Fancy Fruit Cake Mix, 16 Ounce Tubs (Pack of 3)
Paradise Extra Fancy Fruit Cake Mix, 16 Ounce Tubs (Pack of 3)

This will tell them they aren't even worth the time and effort to bake an actual fruitcake. That'll show them!

Either that or they'll take it as a sign that you want them to make you a fruitcake. Yikes!

 
Trappist Abbey Monastery Fruitcake 1 lb
Trappist Abbey Monastery Fruitcake 1 lb

Okay. This fruitcake is made by monks so maybe you shouldn't use it to try to send a message.

 

Photos and text; © 2010-2013 Catherine Taylor. All Rights Reserved

Reproduction in whole or in part without permission is prohibited.

So what do you do with your fruitcake?

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • CampingmanNW profile image

      CampingmanNW 3 years ago

      Excellent lens! I think that at sometime or another, EVERYONE has received the dreaded fruitcake Christmas gift, that is instantly re-gifted and re-gifted and so on until the holiday is over and the last recipient just tosses the cake. Thanks for a fun lens about an unpopular item. Cheers.

    • profile image

      JoshK47 4 years ago

      Toss it! Great lens - blessed by a SquidAngel. :)

    • profile image

      SandyPeaks 5 years ago

      Please send it my way - I like it!

    • CarolynPile profile image

      CarolynPile 6 years ago

      I like the mop best. Or maybe they could be used to retread tires.

    • lasertek lm profile image

      lasertek lm 6 years ago

      I'm no fan of fruitcake. I just can't describe how it tastes.

    • darciefrench lm profile image

      darciefrench lm 6 years ago

      I eat it! Cute and funny lens on fruitcake recycling.

    • MargoPArrowsmith profile image

      MargoPArrowsmith 6 years ago

      lol I loved the mop! Great fun! Especially since you like the stuff!

    • profile image

      anonymous 6 years ago

      This is funny. I love my sister fruit cake, its the best I have ever had.