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10 Things You Should Say to Your Children
Our children are so precious, we need to let them know just how important they are to us every day! Of course there are a million and one important things that you should say to your children. However, that list may be a little long! Here are what I would consider to be the top ten things we should say to our children.
1. I Love You
Tell your children you love them, often! “I Love You! No matter what, I will always love you.” A parent’s love is unconditional. You children will love you unconditionally also. Good parent or bad, children love their parents. They need to know that no matter what they do, you will always love them. Tell them you love them everyday!
2. I'm Proud of You
When your children so something they are proud of, let them know that you are proud of them too! Your children need to know you are proud of them for their accomplishments, not matter how small. They look up to you and you need to give them encouragement. If they know you are proud of them, it will help build their confidence in themselves and nurture their self-esteem.
3. I'm Sorry
Say you're sorry when needed. Don’t be hesitant to tell your children you’re sorry. If for some reason you say or do something that you really shouldn't have, tell your child, you are are sorry. Some people think that saying your sorry is a sign of weakness, I don’t agree. I think it is a sign of strength. You are being strong enough to admit you made a mistake and apologize for it. Your children should learn to apologize when they do or say something hurtful. Remember, they learn from your example.
4. It's Ok to Cry
Let them know that everyone cries sometime. You can cry when you are sad or when you are hurt. Crying is a natural response to pain, either physical or emotional. Everyone cries from time to time, it is a healthy release of emotion. You shouldn't keep your emotions all bottled up inside. Crying doesn't make you a wimp or weak. Tell your children that sometimes even big people cry.
5. You Made a Mistake, It's ok.
Help them learn from their mistakes. Tell them that no one is perfect. Everyone makes mistakes from time to time. Don’t make them feel like they have to be perfect. That puts too much pressure on them. Try to teach them to learn from their mistakes. Tell them of some mistakes you have made, let them know that you are not perfect either. Try to also teach them to learn from others mistakes, don’t wait to make the same mistake themselves.
6. It Was Just An Accident
Accidents happen. Don’t punish your child for something that they did not intentionally do. Explain to them why it happened and how to keep it from possibly happening again. I can remember my parents saying, “It was an accident, you are not in trouble, you didn't do it on purpose.” I felt bad for my friends that would get yelled at and punished for something that they didn't mean to do. I always tried to remember this when I was raising my children.
7. I'm Listening to You
Listen to your children! One of my biggest pet peeves is to hear a child continually saying, “mama, mama, mama” and the mother not paying any attention. We teach our children not to interrupt when someone is talking, but then we never listen to what they have to say. When your child is trying to tell you something, take interest in it. Show them that you care about what they have to tell you. If you will listen to them, they will learn that they can wait until you are finished talking and you will listen to what they have to say. Did you ever wonder why some children don’t listen to their parents? Maybe it’s because the parents don’t really listen to their children.
8. It's Ok To Be Scared
Find our what scares your children. Let them know that it is ok to be scared sometimes. Everyone is afraid at one time or another. We usually fear the unknown and there are many things that children haven't experienced yet. Learn what it is that scares them and try to help them overcome their fear. Remember too, that sometimes a little fear can be a good thing. It keeps you cautious.
9. What Do You Think?
Ask your child's opinion. Let them know that their opinion matters. This will also help you get some insight on how they feel about decisions that are being made. This doesn't mean they are going to be the decision maker, it just means that you value their opinion. This will help them feel like an important part of the family.
10. You Did a Good Job
Praise your children. No matter how small the task, let your children know when they have done a good job. Your children need your approval when they do something right. Brag on them when they deserve it! Confidence building is an important part of growing up.
Check Out Some of These Books
It never hurts to get a little information or maybe just a few ideas from the "experts". Lord knows, our kids didn't come with instructions!
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© 2012 Sheila Brown