10 Things You Should Say to Your Children
Our children are so precious, we need to let them know just how important they are to us every day! Of course there are a million and one important things that you should say to your children. However, that list may be a little long! Here are what I would consider to be the top ten things we should say to our children.
1. I Love You
Tell your children you love them, often! “I Love You! No matter what, I will always love you.” A parent’s love is unconditional. You children will love you unconditionally also. Good parent or bad, children love their parents. They need to know that no matter what they do, you will always love them. Tell them you love them everyday!
2. I'm Proud of You
When your children so something they are proud of, let them know that you are proud of them too! Your children need to know you are proud of them for their accomplishments, not matter how small. They look up to you and you need to give them encouragement. If they know you are proud of them, it will help build their confidence in themselves and nurture their self-esteem.
3. I'm Sorry
Say you're sorry when needed. Don’t be hesitant to tell your children you’re sorry. If for some reason you say or do something that you really shouldn't have, tell your child, you are are sorry. Some people think that saying your sorry is a sign of weakness, I don’t agree. I think it is a sign of strength. You are being strong enough to admit you made a mistake and apologize for it. Your children should learn to apologize when they do or say something hurtful. Remember, they learn from your example.
4. It's Ok to Cry
Let them know that everyone cries sometime. You can cry when you are sad or when you are hurt. Crying is a natural response to pain, either physical or emotional. Everyone cries from time to time, it is a healthy release of emotion. You shouldn't keep your emotions all bottled up inside. Crying doesn't make you a wimp or weak. Tell your children that sometimes even big people cry.
5. You Made a Mistake, It's ok.
Help them learn from their mistakes. Tell them that no one is perfect. Everyone makes mistakes from time to time. Don’t make them feel like they have to be perfect. That puts too much pressure on them. Try to teach them to learn from their mistakes. Tell them of some mistakes you have made, let them know that you are not perfect either. Try to also teach them to learn from others mistakes, don’t wait to make the same mistake themselves.
6. It Was Just An Accident
Accidents happen. Don’t punish your child for something that they did not intentionally do. Explain to them why it happened and how to keep it from possibly happening again. I can remember my parents saying, “It was an accident, you are not in trouble, you didn't do it on purpose.” I felt bad for my friends that would get yelled at and punished for something that they didn't mean to do. I always tried to remember this when I was raising my children.
7. I'm Listening to You
Listen to your children! One of my biggest pet peeves is to hear a child continually saying, “mama, mama, mama” and the mother not paying any attention. We teach our children not to interrupt when someone is talking, but then we never listen to what they have to say. When your child is trying to tell you something, take interest in it. Show them that you care about what they have to tell you. If you will listen to them, they will learn that they can wait until you are finished talking and you will listen to what they have to say. Did you ever wonder why some children don’t listen to their parents? Maybe it’s because the parents don’t really listen to their children.
8. It's Ok To Be Scared
Find our what scares your children. Let them know that it is ok to be scared sometimes. Everyone is afraid at one time or another. We usually fear the unknown and there are many things that children haven't experienced yet. Learn what it is that scares them and try to help them overcome their fear. Remember too, that sometimes a little fear can be a good thing. It keeps you cautious.
9. What Do You Think?
Ask your child's opinion. Let them know that their opinion matters. This will also help you get some insight on how they feel about decisions that are being made. This doesn't mean they are going to be the decision maker, it just means that you value their opinion. This will help them feel like an important part of the family.
10. You Did a Good Job
Praise your children. No matter how small the task, let your children know when they have done a good job. Your children need your approval when they do something right. Brag on them when they deserve it! Confidence building is an important part of growing up.
Check Out Some of These Books
It never hurts to get a little information or maybe just a few ideas from the "experts". Lord knows, our kids didn't come with instructions!
Books on Raising Your Children
You May Also Enjoy:
- 5 Things You Shoud Never Say to Your Children
All of us have said things that we wish we had not. Our children are precious gifts from God, but they can “push our buttons” sometimes. - How To Take Better Pictures of Your Kids
Anyone who has children has taken tons of photos of them. You want to catch all of those cute little things they do. Taking really good pictures of little children is no easy task. I hope to give you some ideas here to help you take better pictures o - Who Is In Control of What Your Children Eat?
I know it is easy to just say yes, when the kids want pizza or hamburgers, but I think we say yes too often! Parents need to take control again. With childhood obesity a growing problem, we as parents, are the only one who can prevent it from happeni
© 2012 Sheila Brown
Comments
Absolutely true, that is the right way to guide them , nurture them and teach them to be confident .Encouragement goes a long way for all creation too. Thank you so much.
I so agree with you, Sheila. Children need to hear those words from the adults in their lives. Words really do matter, they help shape our babies.
Voted up!
Thank you for the useful tips, Sheila. To confess the truth I have never said that it is ok to be scared, and now I see that I should find out what my kids are afraid of :)
Great Hub! I remember when I was a child, even when i did something that was bad- I was always told that they loved me. no matter what. I have taken this into my parenting, and even though I sometimes forget to stop what I am doing to listen, I have made a conscience effort to change that bad habit of mine. You are very right- they watch us and learn from us, we have to set the standards. Thanks for the share
Great advice here for parents! As a teacher, it's great to hear only positive things to say to children. They need positive reinforcement and should be given opportunities for their voices to be heard and listened to. Maybe as adults we are guilty of being 'on their cases' too much, although in an education environment there must be order and rules to follow as you know!
Build trust, confidence and empower our youth, they are the future!
I agree with your list two and ten were sadly missing from my childhood, but I made sure they were in my own children's
An absolutely amazing hub! The best one is to say "I'm sorry". We forget that from time to time... After yelling at my children just because I'm tired, that actually takes an "I'm sorry":)
Perfect! Every parent should post this list on their refrigerator!!
Valuable thoughts here which parents should apply and I so agree it shows proper parenting.
No wonder this hub earned so many comments. This is definitely a great hub and as a parent myself, I do agree and learned a lot from it. Keep it up and hope to read more useful and interesting hubs from you...
Age advise and lovely pictures! Getting mad at a child for having an accident is stupid. And I once knew a woman who was very stingy with praise, she thought praise would give a child a "big head." That struck me as so sad, her kids were grown and I thought how they had not heard how wonderful they were from their own mother.
Well said Sheila.
I do not know why I have not commented on this before today. What we say to our children impacts them in so many ways. I can think of times when my daughter came back to me and thanked me for teaching her this or that about surviving emotionally.
You could not have singled out any 10 things more carefully than you have.
Voted up shared and woo hoo!!
Amazing hub. A must read hub for all parents!!
Wonderful write - Children are the most precious gifts God can give to us and parents need to realize they need nurturing, love, attention along with discipline that shows them how to correct their mistakes. Voted up - Children would grow up more balanced in life if more parents took your advice.
Excellent Hub. The one you listed about listening to your children is my pet peeve. I cannot understand why parents do not take the time to listen to their children and then wonder why there are problems. Well done.
Such a great hub! Sharing everywhere!
I hope and I think my three sons know how much I love and appreciate them. Great hub.
What a wonderful message and beautifully written. I was so
blessed reading this. Voted up +++ shared & tweeted.
Beautiful children. Many blessings for you and your family. :-)
I loved this hub sgbrown! I think you're right on with your assessments about a child's psyche needing nourishing words growing up. The bible talks about having the power of life and death in the tongue. I'm already telling my baby girl in the womb how much I love her and I can't wait to hold her coming out. I get goosebumps even talking about it.
Voting this way up and sharing! Heartfelt and great!
What a wonderful article. I agree that these are all things that we should say to our children on a regular basis. These are the words that will encourage our children to open up to us and trust us. Voted up!
This is very good advise for the parents. When children growing up esp in teen age they are confused and rebellious as they are neither counted in kids nor in adults. Voting it up and awesome.
Great ideas, and remember:
"No one ever told me I was pretty when I was a little girl. All little girls should be told they're pretty, even if they aren't." ~ Marilyn Monroe
Voted up and beautiful! :)
I can't agree with you more on this hub! I can't tell you how many times, as a teacher, I've given this advice to parents. You are so spot on! I bet you and your husband were wonderful parents. Your grandchildren are just adorable. Such sweet precious children from the photos.
Thank you so much for lending your parenting advice to others. So well done and well said.
Loved it ;-)
Hi Sgbrown,
I don't have children but growing up my father didn't do half the things mentioned on the list. Not long before he died he apologized and told me he loved me and was proud of me.
Voted up, awesome and sharing.
Take care :)
Wonderful, Wonderful! I'd like to add two more: 1) I don't know, let's find out. Let's encourage learning, instead of teaching our children to think that Mommy or Daddy knows everything, which leaves them dependent and inferior.
And: 2) You worked hard and did really well. This is a subtle point. When we tell a child "You're bright," or "You're really good at math," we actually leave them feeling a bit powerless. We tell them they are good, but relying on something they can't change - innate talent. When we tell them that they are succeeding through effort (or curiosity, or any other activity), we are encouraging them to do more and get better and try new things. That is true empowerment.
Great hub! I agree with all of it. The not apologizing to children when needed is a pet peeve of mine. I think it teaches children how to be responsible for their own actions and to apologize when they need to, even when it is hard to do so.
Self esteem seems to be a problem more now then when I was a kid. I notice it a lot. My girls are very creative and I let them know how awesome they are all the time! I have had many times of saying sorry as I am by far not a perfect Mom. This is great advice for all parents :)
Thanks for the tips. As a dad, I am really interested to know that I am following majority of the above mentioned points :)
Nice hub and I agree with this list. I had helped me realize what I do right as a parent, and the things I need to work on doing more of. Looks like you are a proud Grandma.... great work!! :)
Just by looking at the photos, I would guess you are one of those wonderful grandma's that really treasure their grandchildren. I agree with all the things you have listed and it is a great reminder to consider the things we say to children. Great hub!
I also felt the same way, when my father was still living. He was skeptical about my technique in singing live on the radio as part of the serenading group of the station. But when I went home, he said that I have also a unique voice that can also compete with famous singers (lol). Hah! That boosted my confidence to continue my other craft, aside from writing, and that is singing and songwriting.
If only my father is living today, he would be proud of my singing, not my guitar strumming technique.
PS: Give my regards to Papa Johnny and your grandson. By the way, I also used to call my father, Papa. He's Papa Ely. :)
I think this is wonderful advice... kids need to hear these things!! Nicely done!
Hi sgbrown... I so love this hub you have completed, the pictures are priceless. Children are so much like little sponges and they absorb far more than we know.
It leaves me to thinking of what is happening so much in the world, you know with all these mass shootings and all. What kind of a home were they raised in, what was there school life like. If someone would have taken the time to listen and love these people could have all this senseless violence be stopped. Thus the reason to love as a parent...those horrible things spoken into a young life are not forgotten, they become a part of their belief system.
Hugs and Blessings
Great Hub, I know some parents out there that need to read this!!!
What beautiful children and grandchildren you have Sgbrown. These are awesome photos and you've captured the sentiment of each point with a great illustration. I like all the suggestions and especially the ones where you teach that children should learn to say "I'm sorry" by example and also understand that mistakes happen. Telling children we love them is so important to their development and self esteem. You've written a great hub. Up and shared.
Great hub! Voted up and shared.
I think it is so important to ask children their opinions. Maybe we don't do this quite enough as adults and that's unfortunate because we can often gather valuable nuggets of knowledge from our kids.
Hi Sheila. Ten simple, common sense tips for parents to abide by and this would be a much better world. This should be must reading for all new parents. Great job. Voting up, etc.... Have a Merry Christmas.
This is an awesome hub! If everyone practiced these 10 tips, we would have a much better adjusted society. I especially appreciate teaching children to learn from mistakes. Voted up and shared!
omg, your pictures are too cute =) I love your message in this Hub - praise, love, guidance, and acceptance! I have to work harder not to scold my children for accidents...its one area where I need improvement. Excellent Hub. I hope many many many other parents out there read your advice.
I agree with this Hub and thank God I did all those things - I can't imagine not being able to apologize to your own kids, and everything else - and yes tell them how much they are loved and how great they are.
What a great parenting hub! By saying these things and letting your kids know it's okay to make a mistake as long as we learn from them are wonderful self-esteem building strategies for well-rounded kids.
Votes and shares! :-)
This is great advice. I make sure that I tell my kids daily that I am proud of them and that I love them. I also have apologized to them before. We even ask them for their opinion. I want to show them that I care! Gonna go share this wonderful advice all over the place! :)
Wonderful! My kids are grown now, but I still love reading such material. You were simple, clear and instructional and the photos were a plus. Really great job. Voted up!
Best advice! These suggestions are very useful for me... Thanks!
Outstanding Hub!1 wonderful rules to live by.. kudos A+A+A+A+A+
What a beautiful, beautiful hub and sentiments. I recently found out that i am going to be grandma so I wrote a similar hub for my daughter not too long ago! I love this and will make sure she reads it, too. Thank you for your beautiful words and all those amazingly beautiful pictures! Up+ and sharing!
Excellent hub, all the points discussed are meaningful and mold a child's personality in the long run... Thanks and definitely voted up.. :-)
Fantastic Hub.. You could not have been more accurate on this. Thanks for the share. Voted up for useful and awesome
I love this hub and this is excellent advice. Respecting and really listening to what your children say is important. I agree with all of it and never hesitate to say I'm sorry when I make a mistake. I've noticed they have learned to apologize for being a little cranky or not listening to me. I think I tell them I love them a million times a day but it can never be too much. Of course I'm not perfect but I also learn from my mistakes and agree they should learn from their mistakes as well and then go forward. Voted up and shared!
Sgbrown,
This hub again does have your stamp on it. It is a very useful advise and very practical ones. I know when I would have my own kids I would try to stick to your advise even though it may not be easy. Voted up and shared with my followers.
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