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Updated on February 18, 2011
Photo   by Stephan
Photo by Stephan

SAD, BUT b. Malin

A friend stopped me on the street the other day...she had such a sad look in her eyes. "Are you all right"? I asked gently. Seeing the tears forming in her eyes.

"No not really" she replied with a deep sigh. "Oh, I feel INVISIBLE and I don't know why...I know they don't mean to ignore me...and other friends tell me the same story...But Oh god it hurts, way deep inside. When it feels like "family" has cast you aside".

As I listened to her, I was reminded of when my kids were small and older women would stop to admire them...and say with a sigh...that very sad sigh, "Enjoy them while you can, they are "boys" and boys love their mothers until as a man, they take a wife...and you could be ignored for the rest of your life"!

Thank goodness I didn't find this to be true...but I learned my place as most mothers do...and learned to enjoy them, and the grandkids too.

My friend continued to speak. "Time flies...they have kids of their own and all those gadgets, especially the phone...but do they phone? NO they do NOT! But the grandkids are worse, they IGNORE...they TEXT everyone...They Facebook everyone...just not me...they ignore me.

"Oh they get involved with their "peers" and homework and...I tried to go on, but she put her fingers to her lips to say "stop" to me.

"No excuse is good enough for me she replied...My grown kids, I guess they do call every now and then...It's the grandkids, that have no time for me. So if I "croak" would they think it's a joke, to TEXT to their friends over and over again"? Once again, I could see tears in her eyes.

"I don't know what to say or how to comfort you" I replied..."A lot of people probably feel like you do...I'm sure at times...I do too. But I try to understand from their point of view".

"Oh crocodile tears...CROCODILE TEARS...let's see how they react when my "will" is read, after I'm dead...and they are left out... enough said. INVISIBLE to me....INVISIBLE TO ME"!


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    • b. Malin profile image

      b. Malin 6 years ago

      Hi KoffeeKlatch Gals, It really is so True...I based this Hub on many Conversations over the years...And yes there are those Family Members who MAKE the time. Thanks so much for your Thoughtful Comments.

    • KoffeeKlatch Gals profile image

      Susan Haze 6 years ago from Sunny Florida

      How sad. Unfortunately as they grow up and begin having their own lives some children and grandchildren tend to forget about those who have raised them. Fortunately there are many out there that cherish their families.

    • b. Malin profile image

      b. Malin 6 years ago

      You are so right Vendetta, and we are all Guilty of doing that...I'm so glad you got something from my Hub...Thought Provoking is Good!

    • VendettaVixen profile image

      VendettaVixen 6 years ago from Ireland

      Very thought-provoking piece, B. Malin. It made me think of my own gran, who lives on her own and sometimes becomes depressed - thinking that none of us appreciate her. Nothing could be further from the truth, but unfortunately, sometimes people get hung up on the bad things in life.

    • b. Malin profile image

      b. Malin 7 years ago

      Thank you, epigramman, I'm going to get back into the swing of things once again...The short stories are very TIME consuming...Hope you'll like the new ones as well.

    • epigramman profile image

      epigramman 7 years ago's always nice to go back and visit some of your buried treasure - and some memories have flooded back to me in this area of your hub portfolio - here is one that I've never seen before - and yes it's true - you have a wide variety of subjects to talk about - and it takes a great writer like yourself to pull it off with aplomb.

    • b. Malin profile image

      b. Malin 7 years ago

      breakfastpop, mine are the same way... I'm glad my kids are (for the most part) Happy and Healthy and leading very active lives. We don't live near it does take planning to get together...but we do, and it works!

    • b. Malin profile image

      b. Malin 7 years ago

      Christopher, what you say is so true...there are also two sides to a story. Thanks for your thought provoking comments.

    • breakfastpop profile image

      breakfastpop 7 years ago

      I hear this all the time, constantly. I have two daughters who are married and have children of their own. They lead very busy lives but we always have time for each other. My grandchildren are young and still seem to adore me, but I do realize that once they grow up it will be 'Hi Gram, Bye Gram." That's okay, it's life and I know that we love each other.

    • Christopher Price profile image

      Christopher Price 7 years ago from Vermont, USA

      b. Malin,

      I can understand your friend's pain from being ignored, but I think she could stand a little reality check. If her children and grandchildren are healthy, happy and busy she should try to find the joy in that situation.

      She could be taking a turn at the hospital sitting with a terminally ill grandchild, or finding room for them at her house because they became homeless during these tough economic times. Or she could be the guardian of her grandchildren, raising them while their mother is in rehab and the father is serving in the military in a war zone.

      So many scenarios are so much worse than not being on everyone's speed dial.

      Hopefully the holiday season will encourage her family to gather together more often.


    • b. Malin profile image

      b. Malin 7 years ago

      MeGunner, Speaking to people, you learn such amazing things...I just had to put it into a Hub, for others to think about. Thanks for your comments and yes, love the lady who gave birth to you and saw you grow into a successful Medical Doctor!

    • MeGunner profile image

      MeGunner 7 years ago from Lagos

      It's amazing that some parents actually feel this way... Thanks for remindinding me to be consciously in touch and in love with my mother...

    • profile image

      Bethany 7 years ago

      Sad...but true kids now always texting each other mostly friends hardly ever family!!!!