ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Are You A Successful Parent?

Updated on March 22, 2017

Many parents may, in the heart of hearts, dread parenting but they will hasten to emphasize that they love their children. But why do they dread parenting when they have abundant love for their children? It is because there are no set rules that may help them in their parenting ways nor is there a guide to tell them that they should act in a specific manner in a specific situation. Further, a method that suits a particular child in a particular situation may not work with another child in the same situation. In short, the word "success" in parenting is a myth, though parents love believing that they are successful in raising their children. The fact is that parents will be able to determine the right parenting methods only retrospectively.

So, the question is which is the best method to raise children? Experts firmly say that consultant parenting is one of the best methods that can work for almost all types of children. Let us now look at a few types of parenting.

There are parents who may never want their children to feel bad and hence, they may be ready to make all possible efforts for mitigating situations that may cause discomfort to their children. There are also parents who go a step further and insist that their children should get only specific teachers whom they have zeroed in on. Of course, almost all the parents keep in touch with their kids' schools for knowing how they do in their studies. In other words, all these parents keep challenges away from their children. This type of parenting is popularly known as "helicopter parenting."

It appears there is a turbo version to this type of parenting. In fact, this version seems to be more ubiquitous these days and it can mostly be seen in affluent families. Dr. Madeleine Levine, who has authored the book “The Price of Privilege,” points out that helicopter parents are forced to over-burden themselves, thanks to their attitude of making every decision on behalf of their children. These parents are not aware that they are sending wrong messages to their children. The result is these kids will not be strong mentally. Their feeling of personal worth will be very low as well.

The other type of parenting called the drill-sergeant parenting also robs the personal worth of the kids. In this type of parenting, children are constantly commanded and directed which means the kids are never allowed to take ownership of their problems. In fact, children of drill-sergeant parents will feel humiliation, pain and weakness.

You may ask which is the most successful type of parenting? If you adopt methods that instill a feeling of self-efficacy in your children, you can be certain that you are successful as a parent. One of the main steps to succeed in becoming such a parent is that you must make your children responsible for their decisions. Being a consultant parent, you must focus more on their actions. To elaborate, you will be allowing your children to make decisions, take actions and learn from the natural consequences of their actions.

For example, if there is a tricky situation, you can ask them what they think and if they have any solution. Instead of you offering the solution, you can make your children think and come out with a solution. In the initial stages, there may be wrong decisions but the lessons they learn will be invaluable. In due course of time, they will be able to assess various types of situations in the right manner and come out with perfect solutions. To summarize, you must make conscious efforts to become a consultant parent.

We often come across parents who help their children surmount the turbulence they face when they are in the middle school. Children are in general adolescents when they are in the middle school. By helping them overcome the turbulence they face, these parents deprive them of the elation they may experience when they surmount the challenges themselves. A study reveals that such adolescents may soon start feeling emptiness and when they grow up further, they may lack the practical skills that are needed to face real-world challenges.

Of course, there may be times when you may have to intervene and help your children. But by allowing them to take responsibility and face various types of situations, you will be providing them with what is known as 'autonomy,' the most important ingredient that can help them grow into successful adults.


    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    No comments yet.


    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

    Show Details
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)