Avoid These Disciplining Mistakes And Adopt The Right Ways Of Parenting
Avoid These Disciplining Mistakes And Adopt The Right Ways Of Parenting
As a parent, if your child does not heed to your directions, you may be frustrated. There are parents who respond to such situations by doing all the tasks themselves. Few other parents yell at their kids. Yet a few others keep nagging them till they comply with their directions.
Experts advise that if your children do not heed to your directions, you should examine and check if your way of giving directions is right. According to these experts, you may be committing certain mistakes due to which your children are behaving like this. The following solutions may help you fix some of the commonest discipline mistakes you may be committing. In fact, these mistakes help you learn the right ways of parenting.
1. When your children are not showing respect
You may expect your children to respect you but you must remember that respect is a two-way road. When you yell, speak harsh words or insult your children, you are not showing respect to them. So, they also learn your behavior. Not giving respect to children and expecting them to respect you is a cardinal sin. So, you must think how you like to be treated by them. Learn to look at things from their perspective and handle them with respect. Remain calm whatever may be the situation and stop yelling or insulting your children.
2. Do not try to discipline your children when you are angry
Anger will not go well with the efforts you make for disciplining your children. When you are angry, you may exceed your limits. You may even focus on those things that are not related to the current situation you are facing. So, the best way is to remain calm for some time and once you are able to think with a cool mind, you can discuss the situation with your children. If you are not able to remain calm, move away from the scene or go for a stroll outside.
3. Be consistent
If you are particular about correcting a specific behavior of your children, you should adopt a consistent approach. If you yell one day and never bother about the behavior another day, you may confuse your children. Instead, you should pass on clear, simple and consistent directions so they will correct their behavior soon. But your expectations should be realistic.
4. Never explain elaborately
If you are in the habit of explaining what you expect from your children in an elaborate manner, stop it forthwith. Children do not like excessive preaching. They may even lose track and stop listening to the points you want to emphasize. If you adopt a direct, basic and simple approach, you can drive home the points you want them to understand.
5. Use positive language
Do not focus on the mistakes your children should not commit. Instead, focus on what they should do. This approach will set the right tone for beginning your interactions with them. Explaining in a simple manner along with appropriate examples will help them understand easily.
6. Disciplining does not mean punishing
The purpose of disciplining is to teach your children their boundaries. If you give them firm guidelines in a lucid manner, there is no need to think of punishing them. In fact, disciplining children is not for finding an opportunity to punish them. It is for teaching them to regulate themselves so they can make the right choices in their life.
7. Do not preach what you do not practice
If you tell your children that they should not speak lies, you should set an example to them by refraining from telling lies. Likewise, if you want your children to talk politely, you must stop yelling or shouting at others. Most of the children consider their parents as their role models and hence, if your behaviors are not right, you can not expect anything better from them.
Parenting principles can not be uniform because the personality of every child is different. So, parents should try various approaches before opting for the right one that suits their children.