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FIVE values to teach a single child

Updated on November 9, 2012
our single son....playing in beach
our single son....playing in beach | Source

Ever thought the balance one requires to set in the minds of a single child while bringing up to face the world? It does not matter a girl or a boy child but the mind set is what matters most. There are several things which need extra care always from the very childhood to put in the mind of the child so that he/she can make a better living when fully grown up. The five things to imbibe in a child as soon as possible when he/she is single precious one to his/her parents are:

· Sharing – A quality to share with all is very much necessary as in future life this plays vital for proper growth of a child. An early understanding helps to cope nicely as one grows up with time but if we neglect then it becomes difficult to inculcate the same as the single child always enjoys an undivided attention with many gifts and presents. Later the child believes that every precious thing is his/her only. This quality affects the personality of the child in public also. Very often in birth day parties they simply refuse the gift to handover to the birthday child one has been invited to as a guest and creates embarrassing situation for the grownups. To encourage them to share things and feelings with the right person is also an important aspect. We should start very early among the own family so that it becomes all very normal with them.

· A sense of responsibility – A sense of responsibility is another important quality needed to be inspired very early to a single child. They need to be taught to be responsible human being from the early stage as its easier then to teach in later stage. It’s normally seen that the single children are over pampered by the entire family and thus they get easily spoiled. They do not know how to cope with responsibility and which becomes very troubling with growing age. Being a responsible human being is required for a proper personal growth. The single child must be given small responsibilities to fulfil from the early stage so that with time the jobs become normal for them. This helps them feel wanted also in the family and it’s much important to make them feel then just to say the things.

son pretty tired and not happy for clicking this pix so far
son pretty tired and not happy for clicking this pix so far | Source

· Sense of independence – Sense of independence is required to be developed from young stage for a better life ahead. Single children are normally taken care of excessively which is not good for them in turn. So it’s necessary to teach them practically to be independent in life. They should taught from early stage to take their own decision even if they face failure and become unsuccessful it’s required for practical approach in life. They need to be taught to go ahead in life alone as they have none to follow as elder sibling and none to show the path ahead as younger sibling. For their future life it’s necessary to be independent and it would be much easier to test and learn with simple decision at younger age then in growing up stage later.

· Adjustment and compromise – To adjust with any situation is very important aspect of life. A situation may not be as per our wish but if we know how to adjust with everything then life becomes much easier. Everything may not suit us but if we try then many unwanted things/situations we grow to adjust with during the process. A negative situation should not affect our mind to make us depressed but we must know that this will pass or else we have to know how to cope with what we don’t like and turn it to our advantage. Normally the single child does not have to compromise in their home but in practical life they do not get that much attention. Everyone needs to compromise and it’s necessary to teach them to take it easy in early stage only. People may not get everything as per their choice and thus they need to be taught to adjust and compromise from early age to be comfortable and easy in later life ahead.

Naughty mood and not ready to pose nice for a pix so far
Naughty mood and not ready to pose nice for a pix so far | Source

· To take ‘NO’ – Last but not the least, it is important to teach them to embrace NO nicely in life. A single child always gets undivided attention from parents and they tend to get YES to their many wishes and desires. But life tends to be different and little difficult with growing time and age. So if we teach them from early stage to take NO nicely with small starting then it becomes normal with them. Practical life is not all about YES and affirmations. So it’s nice to accept NOs with grace and dignity. Even one should be taught to say NO graciously and with much determination. As it has been noticed that NO creates lots of problems and frustrations in many lives. So an early introduction with NO from give and take way is much needed in present world for a happy and simple life ahead.

We parents must try to give a simple and happy life to our children as much as possible. Present competitive world is very callous and it is growing to be more in coming days when our children will be parents. It is much necessary to be careful in case of a single child as they tend to be more sensitive and little extra effort from us will sure go a long way for their happy lives ahead.


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    • dghbrh profile imageAUTHOR


      6 years ago from ...... a place beyond now and beyond here !!!

      Thank you @rajan jolly, for your insightful comment here. Its much appreciated. You are quite right in your view there.

      God bless you


    • rajan jolly profile image

      Rajan Singh Jolly 

      6 years ago from From Mumbai, presently in Jalandhar,INDIA.

      Very useful and important lessons for a single child to be taught, deergha. Singla chils ia really pampered a lot and teaching these values will help him face adversities better in life. Life is not a bed or roses all the way.

      Voted up, useful and interesting. Shared too.

    • dghbrh profile imageAUTHOR


      6 years ago from ...... a place beyond now and beyond here !!!

      Thanks you dear shiningirisheyes...for your nice comment here. Its always a pleasure to have you here. You are absolutely right again. When we are around and when they are kid its almost all right. But what we parents are always bothered is about the future. So its important to teach them to be all very responsible for a bright time ahead. Its nice to know that you agree with my thinking.

      God bless you


    • shiningirisheyes profile image

      Shining Irish Eyes 

      6 years ago from Upstate, New York

      You perfectly chose five very important lessons for instilling in a child. When these lessons are grasped you are offering a child a much happy and content future as they go into the world.

    • dghbrh profile imageAUTHOR


      6 years ago from ...... a place beyond now and beyond here !!!

      Thank you @gmwilliams for stopping by here. You are very kind and I am really honored. It seems my effort so far is of some value at least. We often tend to overlook the need to cultivate good values in a child when he/she is young enough thinking we have much time. In case of single child its more then anything else. Then time runs out of our hand and it is always to late. We should act when we still have time in hand . Your view is much appreciated here.

      God bless you



      Thank you @ midget38 for stopping by and your comment here with shares. It is actually required to inculcate good responsible behaviors as soon as possible and this is more in case of a single child.

      God bless you



      Thaak you @ Chatkath...for stopping by and it is always as you said above and we tend to over look what is to be done as we get tired to meet the days end. But time rolls on and when we realize it becomes to late to recover the damage. I hope you son and daughter in law becomes helpful by my this piece of work. I am really honored truly. Best wishes always


    • Chatkath profile image


      6 years ago from California

      Parenthood is such an awesome task - I don't think that anyone can ever be truly prepared which is why articles like this are so very helpful. My son is an only child and even with only one, as a single parent I found myself so busy trying to survive the day-to-day that many of the values you mention did not get the attention they should have. In hind sight there are so many things I would have done differently....

      I guess that's what grand-kids are for and I am enjoying mine immensely. (lol) I will forward this hub to my son and daughter-in-law! Great Job! Rated up and useful!

    • midget38 profile image

      Michelle Liew 

      6 years ago from Singapore

      Deergha, very true indeed. Actually, every child needs to imbibe all the qualities you have mentioned! Thanks for sharing, I share too!

    • gmwilliams profile image

      Grace Marguerite Williams 

      6 years ago from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York

      This is indeed a GREAT article. Many parents of a singleton tend to infantilize the child much to his/her detriment. Having a single child is NO EXCUSE for parents to overindulge and infantilize the child. All child need to be taught competency, independence, and responsibility. This hub should be REQUIRED READING for all parents of a single child.


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