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Arriving late ...

Updated on October 31, 2010

Jason's birthday tea.

'Right, everyone out... come on, we're late already.'

'I can't get my seatbelt off, I'm too tired.'

'Come on mate, let's get into the pub.'

'Thomas, just do it.'

'Aww, but I'm too tired.'

'Good boy James, stay right by the car.'

'I did it right, didn't I Mummy?'

'You did James, well done.'

'Come on Thomas, James has done it without whining.'

'Alright, I'm getting out!'

'Don't talk to Daddy like that.'

'Da dur du du, ta dis, ta duts, du dut, du dut, tas dats, Momas!'

'I know Matthew, I said that. Matthew says you've not to talk to Daddy like that Thomas.'

'Tt, naaaw 'e didn't! He said he wants you to get him out!'

'Oh right, ha ha, come on then Matthew.'

'Have you got wipes and nappies Linda?'

'Er... yes. Okay. Everybody inside, come on, it's cold.'

'Mummy, Mummy, I can hear birds.'

'Oh yes, James. Wow, there are lots aren't there?'

'Yeah, wow!'

'Thomas, calm down, just open the door, stop jumping around.'


'Go on James, in you go. Thomas, come on now. Just leave the door, it closes itself, leave it, Thomas, LEAVE IT... Thank you.'

'Matthew, you can walk by yourself in here, can't you?'

'Ta dis.'

'That's right, come on this way then.'

'Go on James, keep going, right down to the end.'

'Did she say she'd be late?'

'No, I'd have said if she had, wouldn't I?'

'Alright, I'm only asking.'

'Thomas, just look around that corner, is she here?'


'No Thomas, walk to the end and look properly.'

'Huh, okay!'

'Is she there?'


'We'll find a seat Kev, you get some drinks?'


'Go on boys, over to that big table.'

'No, she's not here.'

'I know, go and sit down.'

'We CAN'T, she's NOT HERE.'

'Do not shout at me Thomas, go and sit down.'


'What do we all want to drink?'

'An apple juice, two small cokes, and a large one, same as always!'

'Alright, I'm only asking.'

'Right. James you sit down as well.'

'Matthew wants to sit next to me.'

'Da dit das du.'

'That's fine. Now everyone be quiet while I phone Laraine and find out where she is.'


'Just a minute.'


'It's ringing, be quiet.'



'Thomas, answer me.'


'Both of you! Be quiet, I'm on the phone.'

'Thomas. Matthew's sitting next to me now.'

'Yer, I know.'

'She's not answering. Oh... hiya, it's me, are you coming? ... to the pub? ... what? You didn't say next Friday, you just said Friday! ... Oh no! You're joking! ... you didn't tell me Jason was ill ... Oh no ... right.'


'No, no, it's okay. Don't worry about it... well, we'll have our tea anyway, and then we'll just go home, it's fine... no, don't feed bad, it's okay... yep, okay, see you next week, bye.'

'Mummy, are they nearly here?'

'They're not coming Thomas, I got the wrong day.'


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