- Family and Parenting
He breaks her heart......AGAIN! ( Part 3 of Teen mom's and their mother's )
....And she dances
The way two people interact with each other in a relationship can be compared to learning how to dance. In order to be a successful dancer you need to have good choreography, an ample amount of rhythm, flexibility, and a sense of humor. When you first begin your courtship dance the first thing you need to do is learn some steps. These steps can be achieved smoothly if you can find a rhythm with each other. Most relationships start with a slow tempo and build gradually. In great relationships the tempo and choreography is in unison. As new steps are added and the tempo increased the partners adapt easily to make the dance fluid. Unfortunately the dance my daughter learned could be compared to " Slam dancing."
When my daughter became pregnant at 17 her courtship dance suddenly had several leaps and jumps added to the already difficult choreography. Along with the step changes came a good deal of loss in flexibility and humor. Her boyfriend Jr's feelings after hearing the news of becoming a father at 17, I would suppose were rather normal at first. Shock and fear was to be expected, but DENIAL? The denial started roughly around the same time as reality was kicking in. The denial I believe was his way of trying to escape from the reality of the situation. My daughter had not been with any other boy during the last 6 months so the denial was quite imaginary on his part. Their dance was quickly changing. He was moving in one direction and her in another. My daughter being terrified at the thought of becoming a mother tried to dance on her own, the steps were so unfamiliar she tripped often and stumbled frequently. Her boyfriend couldn't care less about learning a new dance. Unless of course it happened to be with another partner. When Mandy learned of his new partner she became the " Black swan." Her steps were dark, cold and calculated. She began to draw strength from her anger. Determination replaced doubt. Her child could not afford for her to fall apart at the thought of dancing alone. Slowly, methodically and with much grace she began to choreograph her own dance.